Second in command
by ConvictionSC
Summary: Captain Miles Colburn, XO of the SR2. When his dark past catches up with him, will he lose everything? OC story. AU as of ME1. Takes place in ME3/post ME3/aftermath. Original ending. No ghostboy/colourcoded options. NOT an SI/time-warp/xbox story. Details/pairings in chap 1. POVs vary widely. Thanks for reading!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: (For pairing info, scroll down to the very bottom)**

**Okay, if you read my previous story, Dear Diary, I mentioned about writing a possible sequel, namely Ashley's point-of-view. However, due to good old Carleen, I suddenly got an inspiration for a new story. However, I'm not abandoning the sequel thing. If you're reading this, post a comment specifying if you would like me to do this or that story first. I'll still do both, at the same time. But I'll focus on the more popular one.**

**Do note that this story would be majorly AU. Kaidan and Ashley both survive. Wrex died. And this story takes place during the start of the third game. Event chronology will not be strictly followed. For example, some missions will not be mentioned at all, or some other character would be injured on Mars instead of the Virmire survivor.**

**So, this one's about my own OC. His name is Miles Colburn. Don't ask me where I got the name. It just popped up. He has brunette hair (don't know if that's the correct term), and blue eyes. Deep blue, like sapphires. I always liked that colour. **

**He's a Vanguard. He's from N7. He was first nominated to be humanity's first human spectre, but he declined. So Shepard took the title. He tends to over analyze stuff. Always suspicious. He disguises this with a pretty convincing sense of humor and friendliness, so everyone takes him somewhat like Joker. Well, _almost_ everyone. He excels at playing politics, but doesn't like it. Thinks it's a waste of time.**

**He'll be introduced to the characters as the Normandy's new XO. His cabin is well, across Shepard's. Think as if they added an exact same mirror room on the deck 1. Except for the fact that the armory is replaced with a shelf full of alcohol and liquor. **

**This character has... An unusual way of handling things. Shepard's blonde, with light blue eyes, and impossibly sweet as can be. What can I say. Shepard's god-like anyway. Colburn is, well, not so much. Imagine him as somesort of a paragade. He's nice and polite to his teammates, civilians, c-sec officers, dadada. But he wouldn't hesitate to go all renegade on cowards and politicians, especially the latter.**

**He hates delegating duties to people, as he thinks that "if you want something done right, do it yourself.". As I said, he does things differently. Paragon Shepard would go "teammates safety first" or "Don't give up!". Colburn would go "we have to complete the mission at all cost" or "give anything less than your all and you'll die." He doesn't like to sugar-coat facts.**

**Do take note that Colburn isn't the "plays xbox then gets stuck inside the game world." kinda guy. It's as if he was a real person, like Shepard or Garrus.**

**I hope this notice clears all doubts. I'll write the real chapter 1 tonight. Updates will be longer, but not as often compared to Dear Diary.**

**Ps: Shepard's blonde, is a sentinel, and is a unrealistic goody-two-shoes who doesn't get mad. He's also a spacer and war hero. I'm trying to make him extremely unrealistically perfect as possible. (I know, you'll hate me)I personally hate this kind of characters, but I had to have Colburn's character contrast with somebody. Oh, and Shepard's single in this story. Colburn... Not decided yet. We'll see how it goes. His background will be explained throughout the chapters as it serves as kind of a sub-plot I guess.**

**Update, 3 May 2012: Just to clarify, in the MEverse, there are only two distinctions in the military. One is the ground infantry, aka the army. These soldiers are the ones you see during the final assault on Earth. They're stationed almost permanently at large bases and forts on Earth. **

**The second, are the marines/navy. There's a distinction between marines and navy in real life, but they're one and the same in ME. These are the people that are serving aboard ships such as the fleets and the Normandy. (Oh, and those that are posted at colonies like Horizon and Eden Prime like Ash, are under marines as well. Why? Because they're not serving on Earth!) Colburn belongs to the army, he served on Earth prior to the start of this story. As has been mentioned before, his father had managed to prevent him from being transferred to the navy, which would mean that Cole would be outside of his jurisdiction. **

**You guys understand what I'm talking about? I hope so. Anyway, to be clear, I'm listing just a few of the ranks in ascending order of authority/rank.**

**Army: Lieutenant Commander, Staff Commander, Captain, Rear Admiral, Admiral, Fleet Admiral.**

**Navy: Lieutenant Commander, Staff Commander, Major, General, Admiral, Fleet Admiral.**

**The ranks, as you can see, merely have different names. Captain and Major are essentially the same rank, but you can't use them interchangeably. I might be a General, but I ain't got power over a Captain, since we're under different chains of command. The reason I'm clarifying this, is because whenever I try to correct people, they go _Oh really? I don't believe it. The US army doesn't even have the rank of Lt Cmdr!_**

**Well guess what? This isn't freaking real life for Christ's sake! You can't just use real life ranks for fiction! Go check the freaking codex before you come troll me, you twats!**

**And yes, I check and scrutinise every bit of the official info and codex by BioWare before I use terms and ranks. Call me a nerd or an idiot or whatever. I just like my stuff to be factually correct as possible. So, it really irritates me when other authors use false and incorrect terms like nobody's business. It just pisses me off, you know? I'm tired of idiots questioning me and making me explain the same damn thing for thousands of times and wasting my life, and after days, they go, _oops, sorry. You're right, I didn't check the game codex earlier!_**

**Moral of the story: Check the freaking codex before you come troll me! I even have the link for you here! Just go copy and paste it! **

** masseffect(dot)wikia(dot)com/wiki/Codex/Humanity_and_the_Systems_Alliance#Systems_Alliance:_Military_Ranks**

**Oh, and you might be wondering, isn't Kaidan the superior officer then? Well, Shep's not supposed to be part of the Alliance anymore actually, ever since he was appointed Spectre. But Hackett just had to complicate everything and make him an "unofficial officer", meaning his position isn't part of the aforementioned list at the link above. His authority just comes from his Spectre status and as CO of the Normandy, really. I think everyone's just in awe of him. Most of the time, people doesn't have to listen to his orders. He's probably the most powerless officer throughout the Alliance. 'Commander' is merely a title. Too bad those idiots are too stupid to notice.**

**Update, 26 May 2012: Here's an update on the pairings so far, though any of these can change at any time, including Cole and Ash. Garrus and Tali's though remains to be seen, but I'll let you in a secret: everyone knows they have a crush on each other.**

**Again, Shepard's a bachelor in here, a _very eligible bachelor_, I might add.**

**Colburn/Ashley**

**Kaidan/Liara**

**Tali/Garrus**

**Update, 1st June 2012: As there are readers here were literally jump straight in (they've never ever even heard of Mass Effect before, let alone know anything about the universe, here's some stuff for you to get familiar with.)**

**The following are a list for characters, along with their species. Yes, you have to wiki and google-image every single one of them to understand.**

**Commander Shepard / Human**

**Garrus Vakarian / Turian**

**Tali'Zorah vas Normandy / Quarian**

**Ashley Williams / Human**

**Kaidan Alenko / Human**

**James Vega / Human**

**EDI (pronounced as Eeee-Dee) / Artificial Intelligence**

**Javik / Prothean**

**Liara T'Soni / Asari**

**Steve Cortez / Human**

**Miranda Lawson / Human**

**Subject Zero aka Jack / Human**

**Kasumi Goto / Human**

**Zaeed Massani / Human**

**Mordin Solus / Salarian**

**Urdnot Grunt / Krogan**

**Samara / Asari**

**Thane Krios / Drell**

**Jacob Taylor / Human**

**The Illusive Man / Human**

**Jeff Moreau aka Joker / Human**

**Kai Leng / Human**

**Urdnot Wrex / Krogan**

**Urdnot Wreav / Krogan**

**Admiral Steven Hackett / Human**

**Admiral David Anderson / Human**

**Ken Donnelly & Gabby Daniels / Human (Go YouTube search the two names together and you'll get what I mean)**

**Engineer Adams / Human**

**Mess Sergeant Rupert Gardner / Human**

**Doctor Karin Chakwas / Human**

**Samantha Traynor / Human**

**Aria T'Loak / Asari**

**Kahlee Sanders / Human**

**Legion / Geth**

**Admiral Han'Gerrel**

**Note: The characters of Captain Miles Colburn as well as General Tantus Bexcal are purely mine.**

**That's all for now. There are also terms you need to know, so go wiki them!**

**Sentinel**

**Soldier**

**Vanguard**

**Adept**

**Engineer**

**Infiltrator**

**Biotics**

**Normandy SR1/SR2**

**Omni-tool**

**Omni-blade**

**Shuttle (You have to search long with the words 'Mass Effect' to get the results)**

**The Systems Alliance**

**Ceberus**

**Reapers**

**Citadel**

**Omega (Again, search along with 'Mass Effect')**

**Jon Grissom Academy**

**Sur'Kesh**

**Tuchanka**

**Thessia**

**Rannoch**

**Alchera**

**Also, you'll need to read up on the plots of all three games: Mass Effect 1,2,3. If you don't, you'll get lost very easily. There are a lot more terms I haven't mentioned, but if you see them along the way while reading, and you don't know what that is, better go wiki them.**

**Last but not least, here's a list of all the species in the galaxy.**

**Human**

**Turian**

**Quarian**

**Salarian**

**Asari**

**Krogan**

**Batarian**

**Hanar**

**Drell**

**Elcor**

**Volus**

**Vorcha**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Okay guys. This is the first chapter for this story. Honestly, I'm more nervous about writing this than my Oral exams tomorrow. It's my first attempt at this kind of stuff, so it's probably gonna need a lot of improvement. Leave a comment on how I can do so. Thanks for reading.**

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_Colburn_

Colburn was a busy man. His schedule on a "normal day" included typing reports, testing out prototype weapons for the Alliance, and smart-assing Udina anyway he can during their weekly meeting, which included Hackett as well as Anderson. What his VI _didn't_ inform him, was a Reaper invasion. Or that he would get slammed into a wall, though not necessarily in that order.

He blinked his eyes repeatedly and tried to regain at least some sense of spatial awareness. _God. What's going on? _He scanned his surroundings. The whole place was in total chaos. People were rushing about. Guards on duty held up their rifles, looking around frantically. A familiar voice buzzed through his earpiece.

"Captain, this is Admiral Hackett. Can you hear me? Colburn?".

Colburn snapped out of his daze. "Yeah. I'm right here. What the hell's going on? Wait, don't answer that. I think I know the answer. _But... So fast? _The reports said they were still three days away! _Gah,_ shouldn't have trusted them to be accurate. _God damn it!"._

"We underestimated them. Whatever's the case, they're here now. Captain, I need you to get to the Normandy asap. Major Alenko and Lieutenant Commander Williams are already on their way.".

Colburn hurriedly got to his feet and made a mad dash to where the Normandy was docked. "Where's Anderson and Shepard? This war's over without either of them."

"Anderson and Shepard were at the meeting with the Alliance Council when this whole damn thing started. But rest assured. They're making their way to the frigate as well. Just focus on getting to the ship unscathed. I don't want the crew to lose their XO before they even met him.".

_XO?_ Colburn mused over the sudden promotion. "You know Admiral, a couple more times like these, I'll outrank you in no time. I should probably send a thank-you note to the Reapers, no?".

Colburn finally reached the docking bay. He saw Alenko gesturing for him to hurry, and ran inside the ship with the airlock closing right after him. Colburn shot the Major a quick smile before saying; "I'm here Admiral.".

"Go get Shepard and Anderson. Don't let me down. That's an order. I need to go. Hackett out.".

"Aye aye Sir.".

_-After rescuing Shepard, en route to Mars. At deck 5, the Hanger.-_

"I'm Captain Miles Colburn, Commander. I've been appointed by Admiral Hackett as the XO of the Normandy SR2. I wish we'd met under better circumstances, but looks like the Reapers got too impatient.". Colburn stretched his hand out to Shepard for a handshake.

Shepard reciprocated the gesture. "Nice to meet you too, Captain. But I'm a little curious. Firstly, if you're a Captain, that means you're part of the ground infantry, and not a marine. Shouldn't you be assigned elsewhere? Secondly, Anderson didn't tell me anything about an XO. No offense, I'm just wondering.".

Colburn let out a small chuckle. "None taken. Practically everyone asked me the same thing. During those six months, Hackett and Anderson had already planned to appoint me as the XO of this ship - that is if we managed to convince those thick-headed Council members to release you and this ship. I actually thought that they were never gonna do that. Who knew, the invasion sped things up.".

Colburn immediately noticed the sombre expression Shepard's face took. "Sorry. Didn't mean it. Maybe I should just shut up for the time being.". An awkward silence filled the room.

Lieutenant James Vega barged in the room from the elevator. "Okay. This feels wrong. Just wrong, on all levels. Why the hell are we leaving? The fight's on Earth! We're damn soldiers. We're supposed to fight. That's it, drop me off. I'm going -".

The usually calm, polite and awfully nice Commander Shepard suddenly interrupted. "You think I want to do this Lieutenant! I'm a soldier too. I know it feels bad and awful that we're leaving the fight. But that's not our fight. Our battles are somewhere else. Besides, you heard Anderson. We had to follow orders. You wanna go back, you get a shuttle back to Earth when we dock at the Citadel!". Again, a deafening silence took over. _Damn it Vega, why did you have to shoot your mouth off?_

This time, Ashley spoke up. She was so silent the entire time, Colburn had forgotten she was present too. On the other hand, even thought Kaidan didn't utter a word, he made himself known with the occasional 'cough'. "I don't get it. What does Hackett want by sending us to Mars? What's so important down there?".

Shepard seemed to recover from his sudden outburst. "I don't know Ash. But if Hackett made it a priority instead of the Citadel, there must be something that could turn the tide in our favour. He always has a good reason." Shepard paused for a moment before continuing; "Ash, Vega, you two are coming with me. Go get suited up. Kaidan, Miles, the both of you stay onboard. You guys will be our backup in case anything happens.".

An unanimous "Aye aye." resonated throughout the Hanger in response. Everyone then dispersed and filed out to return to their respective duties. Colburn was the last to exit. "Oh Commander, it's 'Cole'. And, I want to apologise for just now.".

A smile found its way back up Shepard's face. "Acknowledged. Likewise, it's Shepard.". He took a step, and continued; "Also, your apology is noted,though acceptance is pending." before making his way to the CIC. Colburn couldn't resist letting out a hearty laugh before following.

**Afternote: It took me quite some time to get this piece completed, and I will probably not be doing the second one until I get a review. No, I'm not threatening. I just need to make sure that I'm going on the right track. Or else you guys would get shitty writing, no?**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Now, some of you might be thinking that I didn't explain Colburn all too well. Don't worry. His background would be fleshed out in future chapters, hopefully soon, yet not too soon. What am I talking about! His background would serve as a sub-plot to this series. By the way, I'm open to suggestions for pairing in this story, as I'm an Ashley fan. Which means Colburn will most likely go with her. But in the name of fairness, I'm letting you guys get a vote in this, so as to prevent any clouded judgement. But Shepard is going to stay single. He's trying to save the galaxy. He doesn't have time for puny things such as romance... Anyway I hope you guys like this thing so far, and I look forward to your comments and reviews. :p **

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-Normandy cockpit, at the same time when Shepard and his team is on Mars.-

_Kaidan_

Colburn and Kaidan were at the cockpit, overseeing the mission. That of course, only lasted for the first five minutes. They'd spent the next half hour chatting, mostly about the Major's and pilot's time with Shepard aboard the SR1. Of course, they all still kept their eyes vigilant on the radars and statistics and whatnot, but chatting helped everyone feel more at ease. After what happened to Earth, they could all use a little R&R.

"So... Kaidan, does Shepard always go into sudden outbursts?".

Kaidan pondered for a moment. "Well, as nice as the Commander can be, he's human after all. Maybe seeing Earth like that just made him snap a little you know?".

Colburn seemed amused at the reply. "I thought you would sound a little more confident. I mean, you guys went through thick and thin with him.".

Joker cut into the conversation as well. "Maybe. But I don't really feel that way anymore. Not since Ceberus resurrected him. I mean, who knew what they did to his brain?".

EDI chimed in too. "That is most likely inaccurate, Jeff. During the initiation of Project Lazarus, The Illusive Man had issued strict orders against the implantation of mind-controlling devices. The whole objective of the Lazarus Project was to revive the Commander while retaining his mental outlook or characteristics intact and unchanged."

Kaidan couldn't help but retort. "Maybe. But you can't deny. Having the Humanity's greatest icon lying on the operating table, completely unaware and helpless... That's a hell of a temptation. If it were me, I'd definitely jump at the chance.". There was a short pause, and then he added; "Besides, we're talking about Ceberus over here.".

Colburn was starting to express his own view, but he was interrupted before he got to the third word. The voice was coming from the comm._ "Shuttle to Normandy, shuttle to Normandy. Can you read me?"_

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_James_

This _had_ to be the worst day of his military career, or even his whole life. James was incredibly pissed off as of now. What kind of a soldier leaves the fight and goes out playing nice with fucking politicians who can't seemed to think straight? _The noble ones, _his mind seemed to reply. Deep down, Vega knew that Shepard was right. Earth wasn't their place to be, for the moment at least. They were needed more elsewhere. But just the thought of running made him fuming mad. He never ran. It made him feel like a coward. He'd rather die fighting a whole army of husks than go talk in riddles at the Presidium.

As if that wasn't enough, Shepard even told him to go back and man the shuttle, rather than having him help out in the firefight. _Was it because of the incident at the Hanger earlier? _Nah. Shepard wasn't one to hold grudges. Even if he did, the Commander would be sensible enough to not mix personal and professional issues together. But that irrational part of him couldn't seem to help but think that way. Vega had ran into these kind of commanding officers more times than he would like to remember. And now, the shuttle had broken down in the middle of nowhere. _God, is this some kind of sick joke?_ First the Reapers, then the argument with Shepard. And now even the fucking shuttle seemed to go against him on purpose, as if it could sense his irritation. He was going to have to find something to destroy later on.

The sound of Joker's voice broke his train of thought. "Normandy to shuttle, we read you loud and clear. Are you okay Vega?".

"Yeah. I'm fine. The shuttle just seemed to shut down all of a sudden. I'm stuck now. The engines went offline without warning. It isn't responding.".

"Hang tight. Send us your coordinates. Cole and Kaidan are on their way.".

"I'm not going anywhere.". _They better make it quick._

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_Colburn_

They finally reached the shuttle. The low visibility and interference didn't make the search a walk in the park. _Thank God the shuttle was blue. If the shuttle was red... _Colburn shook off the horrifying thought. They landed next to the blue hunk of now-useless-metal and got out.

"Jesus. About damn fucking time. I was wondering where the hell you two went.".

"Is this how the damsel in distress greets his knights in shining armour?". To prove his point, Kaidan gave an exaggerated look of mock indignity.

"Maybe we should've left him here to rot after all.". Colburn further reinforced his statement with a wistful expression. But he quickly got back to business. Time was running out. Shepard could need reinforcements anytime soon. "So why are you all alone? Where's Shepard and Ashley?".

They're still at the base. The Commander sent me to patrol the perimeter for any Ceberus presence. We met an Asari called Liara on the way.".

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_Kaidan_

_Liara? What's she doing here on Mars? _

"Well. Looks like they met an old friend. Come on, let's get back. They might need assistance anytime.". Oddly, Colburn seemed to indifferent about Shepard and co. meeting an Asari on Mars. "Besides, I'm sure Kaidan here would like to catch up with his old friend too, no?". Colburn gave him a wink, as if for good measure.

Kaidan shot his XO a dirty look. As if trying to ask, _what are you trying to say? _But his lips posed a totally different question; "What are we going to do about this shuttle then?".

Colburn shot back by feigning an innocent expression, while replying his verbal question with a "We'll just leave it here. Cortez said that it was old anyway. Besides, we now have excuse to request a new one.".

They boarded the shuttle without another word. Along the way, a question kept looping in Kaidan's mind. He couldn't quite figure out why Liara - or rather any non-human would be at a top-security-clearance lab only accessible to the most important of scientists. A sudden voice coming from the comm jolted him out of his thoughts.

"Damn it! Ceberus is getting away! James? Normandy? Anybody?". It was Shepard's.

"I've got this one!". And with that, Vega rammed their shuttle against the fleeing Ceberus one. The Ceberus shuttle crash-landed, while fortunately, theirs landed safely on the landing pad.

Colburn muttered a curse. "Jesus H Christ, Lieutenant! You trying to get us killed? We were just teasing you. Over-reaction much?".

"Hey, what else was I supposed to do? They were getting away. Besides, now you know not to get on my bad side.". Vega followed that up with a smug grin.

The distinctive sound of metal against metal burst through the air. They all turned towards the source of the gunshots. And there was Ashley, held up in the air by a humanoid robot, who was holding her by the helmet. _No, Ashley! _Kaidan was at a loss. He didn't know what to do. They were too far to run, and they couldn't shoot at the thing. What if they missed?

The next few seconds were a blur. First, he was trying to think of something. The next, something glowed blue beside him. The all-too-familiar mass of blueish-purple suddenly disappeared, then reappeared again, right at the robot. Ashley was on the ground, and already trying to get up. Colburn was nowhere to be seen. _Wait,_ there he was! Eyes shut, sliding down against the metallic wall of the burning Ceberus shuttle, the humanoid robot laying slump on the ground as well. _What? _It was then he pieced together what happened.

_Colburn had biotic-charged the robot._

**Afternote: Well folks, hope this chapter is lengthy enough. Now I've got to get back to my homework. Looking forward to your reviews!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Here's chapter 3. Hope you guys like it. As usual, reviews and criticism are deeply appreciated. And just a note, since this is AU, Chakwas and Rupert are already onboard before the first Citadel visit. Yay! ME3 would've been more awesome with Gardner around.**

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-Aboard the Normandy, med-bay-

_Chakwas_

_Goodness._ Chakwas didn't think there was anything more dramatic of an entrance when Shepard, Alenko, Liara and Vega barged into the med-bay, with what seemed like a really burnt humanoid, an injured Ashley, and a knocked-out Colburn on their shoulders. But she immediately took that back when she say the bruises and burns on the XO's face.

"What _exactly_ happened Commander? And what's _that?_". Chakwas cocked her head towards the heap of blackened metal. But she didn't waste time for an answer. She got to work instantly, already stripping the Vanguard of his armoured plating so that she could check for further injuries on the rest of his body.

"Colburn biotic-charged that _thing._ The manoeuvre managed to take the robot out, but it also caused the both of them to crash against a burning shuttle. How bad is it doctor?".

Chakwas couldn't help but sigh. Colburn's condition didn't look life-threatening, but given her experience, she knew that the actual severity of his injuries could not be judged based on the superficial wounds alone. "I'll do my best Commander. But he needs proper medical care, _fast._".

Liara cut in. "We have to get to the Citadel.".

"Joker, get us there asap.".

"Aye aye.".

No one said another word. There was only the almost inaudible humming of the ship, which was seemingly amplified by the silence. Everyone just watched Chakwas and Colburn intently. Centuries seemed to pass, or maybe just minutes. No one seemed to care. They all just stared. The uncomfortable silence was finally shattered by the sound of Samantha Traynor's voice. "Commander, Admiral Hackett's requesting to meet you on vidcomm.".

"Alright. I'll be there right away.". Shepard's voice was calm and collected, but Chakwas could detect the underlying tinge of annoyance. "Doctor, let me know if there's anything new.".

"Will do Commander. I've got everything under control.".

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_Shepard_

As Shepard walked towards his destination, his mind wandered off elsewhere. _Colburn. Damn._ He should've acted faster. That way none of this would've happened. _Do what? Shoot that thing? What if you missed?. _A horrifying image of a round emerging from the barrel of Shepard's pistol then burying itself inside Ashley flashed through his mind. _JESUS! _Shepard quickly shut the nightmare out of his brain. _Later, Shepard. Not now._

"Shep- Can you hear-". Hackett's static-ridden voice pierced through the air. Shepard could see the blue holographic image of the Admiral's form flicker.

"EDI, can you clear this up?".

"I'll do my best.".

The image of Hackett stopped flickering and the audio became much clearer.

"Commander, Shepard. Can you read me?".

"Yes Admiral."

"Did you find the thing we were looking for?".

"Yes, but it almost slipped out of our hands. Ceberus was there as well. Apparently The Illusive Man knew about the Prothean data over there too. The other thing, was that those Ceberus troops seemed to enter without resistance. There were no signs of forced entry."

"Ceberus? The research facility on Mars was top secret. Even scientists with A-level security clearance only knew about the existence of the base, but not what it was for. To have knowledge of what was going on in there... Whoever's the mole would be really high up in the hierarchy. But this problem will have to wait. What did you manage to get from the data?".

Liara interrupted their conversation. _Wait, what?_ Shepard couldn't remember hearing her enter the room. "It appears to be a weapon of mass destruction of Prothean origin. This could be our solution to the Reapers. However, I need more time and manpower to fully decipher the encryption code.".

Shepard made sure to add; "We're heading to the Citadel now. Lieutenant Commander Williams sustained minor injuries. Captain Colburn got knocked unconscious. Doctor Chakwas is attending to him as of this moment."

"Colburn?". Hackett's voice sounded genuinely concerned. But if it was because of Colburn, or if it due to him worrying about the issue of a traitor, Shepard wasn't sure. "Well then let's hope God's watching over him. Apart from you, he's Humanity's best shot.". He paused for a moment, before continuing; "Well, make sure to get request an audience with the Citadel Council. Inform them of what we've found, but don't tell them where or how we got it. The last thing we want is everyone getting suspicious of each other. Especially with the Reapers still out there. Send over the data to me as well. I'll have my own guys to run tests on it. Take care. Hackett out."

Liara and Shepard walked out to the War Room.

"You don't sound convinced, Shepard. About this fighting chance against the Reapers.".

"You have to admit, it's a little hard to swallow. I mean, thousands of other cycles failed to stop the Reapers, even the Protheans. What makes us think we're so special? And to get hold of a weapon that would destroy them for good, just hours after their attack on Earth... Everything just seems too good to be true.". Shepard slammed his palms against the console. "Listen... Just go see what you and EDI can find out from that _thing._ I'll go check up on Ash and the others.". He walked away before Liara could reply.

As Shepard walked to the elevator, his thoughts began to run wild again. Was he too harsh at Liara? This whole thing wasn't even her fault. _Nice job, Shep. You screwed up, __again. __As if letting your XO get critically injured wasn't bad enough. He wasn't even meant to be there. _Shepard got out at deck three. He started to walk towards the med-bay, but turned around mid-step and started to head towards the lounge instead. He needed a drink if he wanted to wrap his mind around all that had happened in the last couple of hours.

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_Kaidan_

Vega and Kaidan had left the med-bay not long after Shepard went to meet Hackett, with Liara heading to where the Commander and Admiral was while Chakwas tended to Ashley. Kaidan went to clean himself up. The hot water from the shower helped clear his mind. It was still processing all that had happened. While he was hesitating, still unsure of what to do, Colburn had simply charged at that thing without a second thought. The move was surprising, to say the least. Cole was the kind of man who would think and play through all possible scenarios before making a single move, as if the whole thing was a game of chess. He never did something without careful consideration, or at least Kaidan had never seen the reckless side of him before. _Maybe it was just the whole protector instinct kicking in? _Kaidan didn't know. Finally contented that his skin was red and raw, he stepped out of the shower. Kaidan was tempted to return to Colburn and Ashley, but he kept the urge under check and went back to work. After finally enduring to what seemed like a millennia, his shift was over. He was officially off-duty. He had to control himself from running towards Chakwas.

Kaidan walked into the med-bay, and immediately the sight of Ashley caught his eye. She was already out of her armour, and there was a bandage wrapped around her head. But she looked well. Ashley was sitting right beside where Colburn was laying. Just watching him with her brown eyes, gaze intense. Chakwas was doing her work at her desk. Kaidan managed to croak out a "Hey Ash.".

He received an equally flat "Hey.". Kaidan didn't blame her. He knew what she was going through, because he was experiencing the same thing as well. _Guilt._

"Go get some rest, I'll take it from here.". Ashley started to argue, but he cut her off. "That's an order, LC.". She still looked defiant, but relented anyway. She left the med-bay without another word. Kaidan then moved over to where Ashley sat just a few minutes before.

_And now it was his turn to pray for him to wake up._

**A/N: Oh yes, just a note, the squad-mates in this series all have their own personal rooms. It's just ridiculous imagining Kaidan and Ashley each occupying half of the observatory deck. After all, they're superior officers. For the Alliance's finest tin can to not have proper quarters for its officers is just ridiculous. For equality's sake, all of their rooms are on deck three, except for Colburn's, which is on deck one since he's the XO. Hope you guys like this chapter. My longest so far.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I hope you guys are enjoying this series so far. It's much more challenging than Dear Diary, mainly because I'm writing from the perspective of several different people, rather than just one person alone. Also, you most probably would've noticed grammatical and spelling errors. That's because I'm using Polaris Office on my phone to type and upload everything up. The app sometimes randomly deletes words in the document. I read them through twice before uploading but a few always manage to get past my eyes. Thus, please tolerate with the errors. I'm finding a way to get past this problem. You guys know what I'm going to say next anyway. Reviews are deeply appreciated.**

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-Huerta Memorial Hospital-

_Colburn_

Colburn's eye shot open, then shut again almost immediately. _Jesus._ He felt a faint ringing at the back of his ears. And the worst headache ever. The piercing sunlight didn't help. _Sunlight?_ Colburn opened his eyes again, this time slowly and carefully. Monitors lined up on one side of his bed. He removed his hands from under the covers to examine them. _White covers? _Then he proceeded to turn his head to the left, where the sunlight seemed to come from. A panoramic view of the Presidium greeted his eyes. _Wow. This looks so... Peaceful. You can almost forget about the was with Reapers throughout the rest of the galaxy. __Almost._

"Yeah, it's beautiful isn't it? So... calm.". The familiar British accent registered itself inside Colburn's brain. He turned his head towards the far side of the room, and immediately saw the dark-haired woman. He must've been really engrossed to not notice her.

Colburn's lips curled into a smile. "Hey, Sam. What are you doing here?".

"I think it's pretty self-explanatory. Unless you bonked your head too hard and became retarded.".

"I don't think that's how you're supposed to talk when you're visiting a friend at the hospital.".

Traynor gave him a smug grin of her own. "Maybe. So how are you feeling? You had us all worried sick, especially the Lieutenant Commander. She just sat there beside you, refusing to budge until Major Alenko pulled rank on her.".

_"What?" _Colburn's eyes widened in disbelief.

"You should've seen that look on her face. Guilt was written all over it.".

"I think I'd rather _not. _She shouldn't feel that way you know._"._

"Tell _her_ that, not _me._ Anyway, I informed Lea about you."

"Traitor!"

"Am not! She deserves to know! I thought she was family to you!".

"She is! That's why I don't want her to know. I'd bet you wouldn't let her know if something happened to you too."

"_Fine._ Guilty it is. It's really glad to see her excel at Grissom though. And more importantly, she's enjoying it.".

"Good to know. Tell her I'm fine. It's no big deal.".

"A concussion, three-day coma, burns, and you call _that_ fine? I don't think I want to know what's considered _injured_ for you.".

"No you don't indeed. Wuss.".

Traynor opened her mouth to retort, she got cut off by another voice behind her. "You sure you don't want to watch your language since you just woke up?".

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_Traynor_

"_Ashley?_" Colburn seemed to be in disbelief. Sure enough, the sight of the brown-eyed woman greeted her eyes as she turned her head towards the door.

"Well, I guess I should get a move on. Or else Shepard would be wondering if I got abducted or something. Happy chatting.". Traynor acknowledged the other woman with a nod before leaving the room, leaving the two alone.

As she made her way back to the Normandy, Traynor couldn't help but reminiscence about her first encounter with Colburn. Both of them were members of "Save Terra's Future", an organisation that was focused on helping young teens who were orphans, trying to survive in the slums of Earth. A relative huge portion of the members were working for the Alliance, and it came in handy as the teens they rescued were often on the run from gangs and bullies. These children were then provided with a home at the STF Academy, and provided with free education, food and lodgings. Once they are old enough, they will then be sorted according to their respective strengths, and then recruited by the Alliance into posts suitable for them, or sent to Grissom for further training.

It was there that they met each other. Members were often paired randomly into squads, and then sent to roam the slums, looking for those troubled teens. It was that particular time when they found Lea. Dark brown hair, bright eyes and energetic with a nice heart, but on the run from a a bunch of troublemakers. Thank God that she ran into them. They were the only pair in that area. Who knows what would've happened to her if she didn't. The three of them had kept in close contact ever since, and it was a pleasant surprise when both Traynor and Colburn were assigned to the SR2. The both of them had been like an older brother and sister to Lea, that they naturally thought of each other as real siblings.

When Traynor had heard about what happened to him, she didn't even try to hide her worry for him in front of Shepard or any of the crewmates. That, of course, raised a few eyebrows as to the true nature of their relationship, but they themselves knew better.

As Traynor walked through the airlock, she thought; _Yeah, he'll be fine. The toughest nut to crack in the galaxy - apart from Shepard that is._

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_Ashley_

Ashley wasn't sure of what to say. To claim that she was a total nerve-wreck was a gross understatement.

"So are you just going to stand there or do you want to sit down?". Ashley's mouth hung open, wanting to reply but not sure how to. Colburn let out a small laugh after noticing her expression. "Relax. Take a seat. I don't bite.". She promptly sat down, but didn't say anything. _God, why is this so hard? I'd rather take down a Reaper single-handedly. _"So... I take it that you're here to thank me? ". Ashley wanted to say _'Yes',_ but she just pursed her lips and nodded. "Okay... You're welcome. Is there anything else? If you're still feeling guilty about _this,_ don't be. It's not your fault.". _Well, that gave her an opening._

"It is! You wouldn't have charged it if it didn't had a hold on me. You did it to _save __me_."

Colburn arched an eyebrow. "Are you trying to tell me I shouldn't have?".

"Yes! ... No! I - Ugh. I don't know! I just... Can't stand it when someone does something like that for me. I'm... Not good enough...". Her words trailed off.

"I don't think you should, or rather, justified, and allowed to feel that way anymore. You broke the Williams family curse. I remember how you told me about your family history, and how you were sure you would top out at Gunnery Chief. Look at you. It's _Lieutenant Commander Williams _now. The Alliance has already proven it. They've looked past everything. You earned this, as well as everything else in your life. Your rank, friends, respect from your subordinates. You deserve it. And I didn't save your life just to let you wallow in guilt that you aren't even supposed to feel in the first place. If you want to make my action worth it, then stop all this nonsense. And return me that gutsy Ashley Williams I know, not some wimp. Understand?".

She broke into a smile. "Thanks. You really do know how to cheer people up huh? Guess they didn't call you Mr Counsellor for nothing.".

Colburn returned an equally wide grin of his own. "I try.".

**A/N: Just for your information, in this series, Kaidan, Ash, and Cole have met and bonded over the course of that six months. And Traynor acts as his part-time mum I guess. Cole has relatively amicable relationships with almost everyone he interacts with. Well, _almost._ We'll touch on that 'almost' later in this series. Sorry for the short delay. Been having lessons at school till 8pm these days, and it's gonna continue for another week or so. So I'm busier than usual. As always, looking forward to your comments and reviews.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: You might not know it, but the previous chapter was written in 15 minutes intervals over the span of two days, at a variety of locations. From school, to bus, walking home, and even before bed. Ain't I awesome? Lol. Anyway here's chapter five. Sorry for the slight hiatus. Was studying for my exams, which starts on Friday. Didn't get any comments on the last two chapters at all. Hope to see some in the near future.**

-Menae, during the mission to rescue Primarch Victus-

_Colburn_

_Splat._, the sound of brain matter hitting the ground. Shepard looked up from the scope of his sniper rifle. "You're losing your touch, Shepard.". Colburn mused at the sight of Shepard's face when he realised that the round wasn't lodged _exactly_ in the middle of the Cannibal's eyes.

"Says the guy who got himself knocked out.". Shepard took a shot at an oncoming husk. This time, the shot hit home.

"Just admit it. You're getting rusty.". Colburn sent a shockwave in the direction of a group of Cannibals. They went flying in different directions.

"Stop flirting, ladies. We've got a Brute on our hands!". Garrus let off a well-aimed Concussive Shot at the Brute. The giant monster staggered a few steps back. Colburn swiftly followed that up by throwing a proximity mine towards the Reaper-modified Turian-Krogan hybrid. The mine detonated upon contact with the creature's metallic hide. The Brute was now stumbling. "Not bad, Cole! You're actually using the mine as a grenade!".

"Turians aren't the only ones who can improvise!". The look on Colburn's face put the word 'arrogant' to shame.

Shepard threw in an Incinerate blast. The Brute went down, this time for good. "My my, colour me impressed. But if you guys wanna win me, _fat chance!"._ Shepard's words were _just_ _overflowing with cockiness._

Colburn blasted a Cannibal over the cliff with a shockwave. He turned to look for more targets, but there were none left. "That all of them?".

"I think so. Garrus, where's Victus?".

"Right over there.". Garrus pointed a talon in the direction of a Turian in red-and-black armour. The trio started to make their way towards him, but _three Brutes_ jumped out of nowhere. "Guess we all get one last dance huh?". Naturally, the trio of soldiers and monsters alike broke up into pairs. Colburn biotic-charged the giant, and immediately rolled to the side, narrowly avoiding the Brute's talons.

"Watch it, Cole! I don't want to have to drag you back to the Normandy. You know how many pounds you weigh?". Shepard froze his opponent with a Cryo Blast, then shattered the gigantic ice sculpture with rounds from his sniper rifle.

"You do know I'm a Vanguard right? That's what we do!". Colburn unleashed a Nova, completely obliterating the metallic creature.

"Less talking, more action!". Garrus lined up a Concussive Shot, then proceeded to spray the beast with his armour-piercing rounds. The Brute fell to the ground.

"Commander Shepard! Nice job! We owe you our lives!". The trio turned their heads to see Primarch Victus running towards them.

"You're welcome, Primarch. But we came here because we need your help. We need you help us fight the Reapers, take back Earth.". Shepard's voice was now in its usual down-to-earth tone again, Colburn noticed. _Guess Shepard and Commander Shepard are two different people. _

"No offense, Commander. But as you can see, Palaven and Menae are under Reaper attack. These are my homeworld, along with other Turian colonies. I can't just leave to fight for Earth.". The Primarch's voice was irritated.

"I know, Primarch. But the Reapers can't be defeated by conventional means. That's why the previous cycles lost. They only cared about themselves. I need you. _The galaxy needs you. Please, _Primarch.".

"Give me a few minutes with my men. "

"Of course.".

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-medbay, while Shepard reports to Hackett-

_Chakwas_

"Captain, you have to stop fidgeting.".

"Doc, I told you. I'm perfectly fine. I don't need a check-up."

"A head concussion, my dear Miles, _isn't fine._"

"No one calls me that anymore... At least not since twelve years ago.". Chakwas saw the muscles on Colburn's face tense.

"It's been so long. Don't tell me you still hate him.". _Careful,_ Chakwas thought to herself. _Sensitive subject. This topic's like a mine-field._

"Well surprise, Doc! I still do, and even more so right now. _Can you believe it?_ I'm the XO of the Normandy, and I'm still a _Captain,_ not a _Major._ I even offered to drop two ranks down to get transferred to the Marines. Yet after six months, it still isn't approved! I'd bet it's him pulling strings again.". Chakwas glanced at the monitor. Colburn's heart rate was increasing, _drastically._

She tried to say something to calm him down, but got cut off. "Stop saying he's concerned about me. He's just a control-freak. Always was, and forever will be. _I'd bet he'd kill Hackett t_o keep me under his jurisdiction, though that's most likely impossible.". It was only after Colburn finished his piece that he finally realised the _oh-my_ stare the older woman was giving him. "What?". Colburn looked genuinely perplexed.

"Should I send you for anger-management therapy?". Secretly, Chakwas was thoroughly enjoying watching the young man scratch his head, thinking of ways to make a good comeback. Finally , she couldn't resist. Sympathy overwhelmed her. "Alright, get out of here.".

Colburn hurriedly scrambled out of the room. Then, Chakwas remembered. _Oh sod! He was supposed to get his check-up!_

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-Lounge-

_Colburn_

Colburn swallowed his God-knows-how-many shot of Brandy. The dark brown liquid burned his throat wonderfully. The stinging sensation helped ground him to reality. Pain and discomfort always did. That was why he always refused painkillers when he got injured, during missions. The only time he did, was during that eye operation. After the operation was completed, he rejected them immediately. He poured himself another glassful.

The conversation in the medbay was unexpected, to say the least. Why did they talk about _him_? _Oh right,_ they _always_ talked about that guy when they were alone. It was a secret that only few in the universe knew. Hackett and Chakwas, because of their friendship with _him,_ and Samantha Traynor because Colburn told her about it.

Colburn was a man who would trust his life to people he knew less than five minutes ago. But it would probably take him a millennia to entrust someone with a secret. Sure, he would risk his life for some random stranger without hesitation. But letting Lea know about a tiny secret? _Hell, he'd rather face twenty Brutes by himself. _Colburn always found it hard to really divulge his true feelings or thoughts to somebody. Even the heart-to-heart talks with Sam were occasional at most. Colburn's mind wandered back to the conversation minutes before. Sure, he kept things light by deliberately rambling in a humorous manner - he always did. Humour was his source of solace and solution to awkward or pessimistic situations. That's why a lot of people had the impression that he was a light-hearted person, who could see the bright side of anything and everything. But that was also_ exactly the opposite_ of who he really was. That mischievous, morale-raising young lad was just a facade. He just presented himself as what others _needed_ him to be, or _wanted_ him to be. The only time he _really_ let the _true_ him surface, was with Sam. Alone. And even that was under fifteen minutes, plus it only happened once.

Drinking was the only time when he could get rid of that disgusting mask. But even this luxury was very rarely enjoyed. He had to control himself, or the soldiers would only get a wasted drunk for a leader. Thus his usual outlet to vent all his frustration was sparring, which resulted in a close bond between him and James Vega.

"So, you just gonna drink everything without me?". The familiar voice jolted him out of his thoughts. He turned his head around to see Ashley take the seat beside him. There was no one else in the lounge.

"Hey, Ash. What are you doing here?". Colburn flashed his all-too-familiar smile, one that he had practiced at least ten million times.

"I could ask you the same thing."

"Just... Wanted to take my mind off stuff.".

"Want to share? I'm here to listen."

"Nah, I'm good. Just that everything that happened recently made me snap a little.". _If only it was true. _"Besides, you have your own troubles too. No need to add on it."

"Granted.". Ashley let out a small chuckle. _God, that sounds so... Snap out of it, Cole! It's just the alcohol! _"So, I guess here's to us.". Ashley raised her glass.

Colburn held up his.

_"To us."_


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: You have no idea how happy I am right now. Two more people onboard! KatieK98 and HollowReaper45. Add that to good old Carleen and Rainbowboobies, our crew adds up to four! Yay! Haven't reached the 'Five' milestone yet, but an improvement from Dear Diary's three at least. Updates will be a hell lot slower for the next three weeks. Maybe there won't be a single chapter after this, but I'll try not to make that happen. Anyway, glad you guys are enjoying this. For record, I'm holding a poll-ish sort of thing to see who you want to get with Colburn. Liara's strictly reserved for Kaidan though. State your preference in the comments. That said, here's your story.**

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-Colburn's room, while the Krogan and Salarian representatives are getting onboard for the summit-

_Traynor_

The silence was ominous. While she had explained everything to Colburn, the man stayed ominously quiet. Quiet Colburn was the worst kind of thing in the galaxy. _Even taking a Reaper one-on-one wasn't as bad._ There were three stages of Miles Colburn. When he was angry, raising his voice, throwing things, that was safe Colburn. It showed that he still cared. He would still help you, no matter what.

Humorous Colburn was... Worrying. Traynor knew the guy inside out. If he was deflecting concern with jokes, the average guy would have thought he was alright. But she knew better. Jokes meant that there was a lot on his mind, but he was unwilling to share. But if you could see him drinking, then he would be fine in awhile.

The worst kind, was silent, emotionless Colburn. It always sacred Traynor how those deep blue eyes, always so full of energy, could transform into something so _cold, unfathomable_. Colburn was already an unpredictable man in the first place. There was a whole universe within him, that he locked out to the rest of the galaxy. He just hid it well.

The image of him stabbing a Batarian merc with his Omni-blade, face expressionless, was deeply engraved in her mind. That was a few years ago, when she got harassed by this group of Batarian no-lifes. He stepped in from nowhere, and with no weapons but his Omni-blade, made quick work of them. The flurry of biotics and slashing had already stunned her, but it was his face that _really_ took her breath away. The Colburn she knew was gone. In his place was pure destruction. He gut them, slashed, punched, threw, slammed, charged, _everything. _And his face was blank._ Just blank. _He sent her back to his apartment after that. Told her to move to another apartment of his at the Presidium. _Shalta Ward was full of low-life scum_, he said. _And he acted as if he just took out the garbage for her, nothing else._

"So, did you manage to contact Lea?". The sound of Colburn's voice brought her back to reality. _Thank God, he's speaking. _But his voice was still emotionless. Though Traynor knew his brain was processing at FTL speed, trying to think of a way to salvage the situation.

"No... Not yet. But there's still hope. The fact that they managed to send out a distress signal proves that they're still fighting. All's not lost yet, Cole.". Traynor tried to paint it in a positive manner, _if that was even possible that is_. The all too familiar silence in the air left an unspoken question: _What now?_

The sound of EDI's voice broke the life-threatening quietness. "Captain Colburn, the Salarian Dalatrass and Krogan Warlord are onboard the Normandy. Primarch Victus and the Commander are making their way to the conference room right now.".

"Thanks EDI. I'll sort this out, Sam. I promise.". Colburn left the room without another word.

Traynor prayed that the politicians would be accommodating for once. Not for him, but for their own safety. Her surrogate younger brother had a low threshold for them. To piss him off, especially now... _Dear God._

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_Shepard_

Shepard would've liked to say that the summit was going smoothly. But of course, it didn't. As of now,_ nothing ever did. _The Salarian Dalatrass was adamant on not curing the Genophage. Shepard couldn't blame her. The Krogan were an unknown. And given past records, _a very_ _violent unknown. _Urdnot Wreave was _really_ getting on his nerves. If they didn't need the help of the Krogan, that arrogant trash-bag would just be a lump of meat right now and then. But they still needed the cure. That was the unfortunate truth. "Dalatrass, please. This is much bigger than them, or us. This is about the entire galaxy. Besides, they've suffered the Genophage long enough. We should give them a second chance.". Shepard despised himself for saying that. He didn't even believe half a word of it. _But whatever works_, he thought to himself. He stole a glance at his XO, who was uncharacteristically silent, just staring hard at the ground.

"The Commander is right. If we need the cure to gain the help of the Krogan, then so be it.". _Thank God the Turian's on my side. _

"You better think carefully, Salarian. You'll perish without the help of the mighty Krogan!". Shepard was seriously sick and tired of all the taunts. _It's like he doesn't want the Salarian to agree!_

The Dalatrass opened her mouth to make her stand again, but she got interrupted by a flying chair. It was Colburn. The chair hit the glass panel surrounding the table. It shattered. _Well that certainly got their attention. _

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_Colburn _

_God, Colburn was mad._ Fuming, even. Like a glass of vodka set on fire. His brain was still scrambled, trying to process the piece of news Samantha just gave him. It had taken him an effort the size of the Milky Way to control himself from breaking everything in the room. Sam didn't need to see that. She didn't deserve that crap. He knew she was as torn as he was. Maybe even more.

_And now this? Just agree to cure it already! What's up her ass? _And the annoying Krogan as well. It's like he had a dozen sticks shoved up his as well. And hearing Shepard stoop so low to plead the Dalatrass, his dignity almost gone. _That really pissed him off. _Time to end this nonsense.

"That's enough! All of you! This isn't working! So I'll tell you what's going to happen.". Colburn paused for a short moment to compose himself before continuing; "We're going to Sur'Kesh to get the females. End of story. I don't give a shit about how you feel. Earth is burning. Palaven is burning. We wasted our time talking to you when we could've been helping our friends and family right now! So I suggest you shut up and stop all of your nonsense, or we won't even have a war left to fight.".

Apparently- Urdnot Wreave was about to rub in another insult, but Colburn cut him off mid-sentence. He on a roll. "And stop your telling us how much we need your help, Wreave. For all you know, we would probably just start the second Genophage after this war is over! And that's because you pissed all of us off with your nagging. The Urdnot name would be _in shame_. And I'll jolly well do that. Believe me. So know your place! This isn't Tuchanka. No one needs to hear your nonsense.". To prove his point, Colburn slammed the Krogan into the wall. _Well that did the trick. _Colburn stormed out of the room.

He needed a drink.

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_Kaidan_

Kaidan found his bottle of Scotch. Whiskey in hand, he trotted to the lounge. _There he was. _He saw Colburn downing drink after drink, just staring at the large observatory window. Kaidan had never seen his friend like this. The guy was virtually the embodiment of 'Consolation'. Colburn had a reputation of being able to cheer anyone and everyone up. But recently, it looked like Mr Counsellor needed some counselling himself.

_Okay, take it slow._ "How's my favourite biotic doing?". Kaidan sat down on the couch beside Colburn.

Kaidan could see Colburn's lips curl up in amusement. "I thought that was Liara?".

Kaidan's eyes widened in horror. _What? How could he know? Think. Alenko. Think. _"She's my favourite _Asari._ How's that?". _Thank God. Not bad, Alenko._

"Much better.". Colburn lifted the glass to his lips again.

Kaidan waved at his prized bottle of whiskey. _Sorry whiskey, looks like it's either you or my best friend. I'll remember your valiant sacrifice_. "Stop drinking that. _This,_ is much better."

Colburn shook his head. "Nah it's fine. Leave it for your date. It's important to you."

_Here goes nothing._ "Traynor told us everything. Shepard knows. He's arranged for you to lead another squad to Grissom. You're leading. Everything's gonna be fine."

"_Fine?_ After that little circus trick just now, I don't know if it's gonna be fine."

"Heh. Shep told me he couldn't have done it better himself. You saved him from hypertension."

"Good to hear.". Kaidan could still sense the younger man's frustration.

"I'm planning on going with you, if you don't mind. Ashley too."

"Why?".

"Because without you, the war's already over. You're just as important as Shepard or Hackett. Besides, it's been awhile since I graduated from that school. Time for a little alumni visit.".

Colburn managed a small laugh. "Wow. You're better at this than me. I'm gonna lose my job soon."

"So pick yourself up kiddo. We've got a long road ahead of us."

"Aye aye."


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Since I have time, I decided to do another chapter. As usual, please rate, comment and subscribe. And the previous chapter was written in under two hours. I rushed through at the end because I was in a hurry. Hope it's not too bad. Ps: Cole, Kaidan and Ash hitched a ride aboard the SSV Artemis to get to Grissom, since the Normandy had to be on standby for Shepard on Sur'Kesh. Cole uses the sentry interface, so does Shepard. In this story, the visor is deactivated during conversation, and turned on during combat. It's supposed to display the vital stats like oxygen level, heartbeat, a GPS map, night-vision, and some system that helps you aim better, detect weak points on the enemy, such as canopy on the atlas, and maybe a built-in binoculars. I don't know. All I know is that it's damnedly awesome. Btw, Jack doesn't exist here.**

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-Grissom Academy-

_Colburn_

"Kahlee, open the door. It's us.". Colburn banged on the door twice. The door opened to reveal a blonde-haired woman in Alliance dress. Colburn and Sanders hugged.

"_God,_ Cole. _It's been so long._ How are you?".

"I'm fine. But I'll be better if you could give me any info on the students."

Sanders broke the hug, and went straight to the nearby computer. Her fingers flew over the keyboard. "The students... They're at Orion Hall. They're holding, but Ceberus is all over the place. You have to hurry. I've uploaded the Nav-point to you."

"I'll get them, Kahlee. Count on it."

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_Ashley_

Ashley couldn't help but let out a low whistle. The whole damn place was _beautiful._ The shiny walls, glass-covered areas of vegetation decorating the place. It was _gorgeous._ It felt like a lab, a hospital, a villa that belonged to a filthy rich Volus. _Just not a school_. "I can't believe you studied here, Kaidan."

"Yeah, me too. It's wonderful isn't it? I haven't been here ever since I graduated.". Kaidan let out a small sigh, looking at Colburn who was walking in front of them in the process. "But just look at the damage those bastards did to this place.".

_He was right._ No matter how breathtaking the view was, it failed to hide the random patches of red sprayed on the pristine walls. Or the black marks on the ground that symbolised shields being overloaded. The stray dossiers about catching 'priority-alpha' students as suitable indoctrination tests subjects didn't add to their confidence. Not far ahead, Ashley saw Colburn throw another document to the ground in frustration. Kaidan picked it up and they read it together.

_Student I-D: Jason Prangley_

_Priority level: Alpha._

_Subject shows high level of leadership, biotic potential as well as intelligence. Is able to make decisions according to different situations. Subject is an extremely valuable experiment subject for indoctrination. Should results be positive, will be capable of being an infiltration unit. Although subject suffers from a lack of self-confidence., can be off-set by indoctrination. Bring back alive at all costs._

_"Prangley? Isn't he in Lea's class?_", Ashley heard Colburn mutter.

Ashley let out a breath she didn't realise she had been holding. "God, they're inhumane!".

Kaidan hurled the dossier at the wall. It shattered into pieces. "We have to stop them!".

Ashley put a hand on Colburn's shoulders. "You okay?"

"Yeah. I'm good. Let's move.". His words were steely cold, but she knew he was worried. _He had to be._

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_Kaidan_

Kaidan had never seen such powerful students. And they were only teenagers. _If they were grown up..._ No wonder The Illusive Man wanted to get his hands on them. He'd have an army of unstoppable biotics, all under his command.

The way the red-haired boy - what was his name again? Jason Prangley? - put up a barrier against an incoming missile from the Atlas... _It was incredible._ _It's no wonder he's on alpha priority._ Colburn had ordered the students to take cover while they took out the gigantic heap of metal.

Colburn's proximity mine had took out the Atlas' shields. Kaidan threw a stasis, holding the bulk-of-a-machine in place. Ashley lobbed an incendiary grenade. The Atlas exploded under heavy gunfire, setting nearby troopers on fire as well. _Talk about collateral damage. _They made quick work of the remaining Ceberus soldiers. The group of young biotics all rushed down upon seeing that the coast was clear.

A young brunette practically launched herself at the sight of Colburn. That must be Lea who Traynor was talking about. The two held each other in a tight embrace. Colburn cupped her face in his hands. "You alright?". His eyes scanned every inch of her face, and then the rest of her body.

"I'm fine, Cole. I'd knew you'd come for us.". Apart from the exhaustion on her face, Kaidan noticed that she actually seemed happy.

Colburn seemed to have regained his composure. He stepped back at arm's length from the brunette. Apparently, he was a little embarrassed by the sudden outburst of affection. But no one seemed to mind. They knew they would've reacted the same way. _He would've. _"Who's in charge?". Colburn's voice was evident of new-found relief.

Jason Prangley stepped up. "No one really... Our instructor got...". _Decimated,_ the following silence seemed to say.

"You sure it ain't you? I've seen you in action.". Colburn sounded impressed.

The young biotic seemed to blush. "That was... A stroke of luck.". Kaidan was starting to like the young guy. And he had a feeling Colburn did, too.

"Luck doesn't have a place in situations like these, Prangley. You either make the cut, or you don't. Do you?"

"Yes sir!". _This guy really knows a good thing or two about inspiring confidence._

"Good! Now let's get you guys out of here."

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_Colburn_

"Thanks, Watson. You helped us a lot back there. And now you sent us to the Citadel too."

"Anytime, Cole. Besides, we needed to stock up on supplies. It's the least we can do. I have to get back. So long, buddy.". The two men waved goodbye. Colburn made his way to his apartments at the Citadel.

His squad, along with the Grissom Academy students had been escorted to the Citadel, courtesy of Commander Watson of the SSV Artemis. Before they arrived, Colburn had already made arrangements for everyone. From lodgings to clothing, everything had been taken care of. The students had been arranged to help out in the war effort as barrier-holders. No way in hell was he letting them be part of the Artillery Strike Force. It was too dangerous. And he wasn't taking any chances with Lea's safety. And now, they were just waiting for Shepard to arrive to pick them up. The students were leaving for Earth a few days earlier.

Colburn reached his block, _literally._ The whole damn block was his. Maybe a quarter of it anyway. He'd owned six out of the twenty four units. Alone, Colburn didn't spend much. Plus he was always on duty. The money just grew in his bank account. He'd bought several apartments just in case a friend, or rather, friends, needed help. Today, it came in handy. The apartments were all on the same floor, lined up beside one another. This made it convenient in case of emergencies.

He entered unit 206, which was his personal apartment. The apartment was dark, pitch black even. _Hold on a sec, he didn't have the habit of closing the curtains_. Something was definitely wierd. His body glowed blue.

Then the lights turned on, and he felt something pounce on him from behind. His instincts were to just send out a Nova blast, but he stopped short upon hearing a familiar voice. "Surprise!". It was Lea's.

"Jesus! Lea, I could've killed you there and then!". Lea just giggled. It was then Colburn realised they weren't alone. One by one, faces came out from behind the couches and walls. Kaidan, Ashley, Prangley, those other students from Grissom... "Okay okay, what are you guys trying to do? Gang-rape me?".

"Loosen up, Cole. You need to relax. It's just a party.". Kaidan gave him a friendly nudge.

"Somehow, messing up my apartment, or trying to give me a heart attack would probably just tense me up, no?"

"Come on. Don't be a spoil-sport. Chill out!". Lea handed him a green-coloured drink. He took a sniff. _Batarian Shard Wine. _Colburn wanted to tell her off for underage drinking, but ultimately decided against it. They might not have much time left, given the current outlook of matters. Besides, they were right. He had been too tense for the past few days. _Time to loosen up._

Colburn took a seat at the bar, slowly relishing his drink as he took in the view. Prangley dancing next to Lea, Kaidan demonstrating some flashy biotic moves to a few other students. _Wait, where was Ash? _He looked around, curiosity overwhelming him. He felt someone tap on his shoulder. "Looking for me?". He spun around to find Ashley smiling at him.

"Was wondering where you went. Then again, what makes you so sure I was looking for _you?_"

"I told you, you won't get away with drinking alone.". Ashley sat beside him, and poured herself a glass of the wine as well.

"You sure about that? That's heavy stuff you know."

"Did you hear that?". Ashley put a hand to her ear to mimic hearing for a very soft sound. "That's the sound of my fragile heart breaking.".

A hearty laugh escaped Colburn's lips. "Now that's a good one!"

"No, seriously. Do I look like such a light-weight? Because I'm not."

_Oh, this is gonna be interesting._ "Well then, prove it."

"Game on!".

_This is going to be fun._


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Great news guys! We have six readers now! Yayyyy! 1138 and R3dox are onboard! The plot is gonna get a little darker later on. I don't exactly plan my plot. I just do whatever's on my mind at the time. And, apparently there's quite a few supporters for a Cole/Ash romance. Maybe I'll do that. But for those of you who want a different partner for him, better act quickly.**

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-Citadel, just before Grissom Academy students leave for Earth.

_Colburn_

"I'll miss you Cole.". Lea broke the hug.

"I'll miss you too, Lea. Take care of yourself."

"Tell Sam I love her, okay?"

"Will do.". Colburn checked his Omni-tool. _11.45 am_. He handed Lea the suitcase. "When you reach Earth, look for Admiral Anderson. Drop my name. He'll know what to do."

"Yeah, okay.". Lea took a deep breath. She gave Colburn a last embrace. "I love you guys."

"We love you too, sweetheart. Keep safe. Oh, by the way, Prangley's a nice boy." Lea seemed to blush at the mention of the boy's name.

"You think so?"

"Yeah. Go for it.". _Before it's too late._

The brunette seemed to brighten up at his encouragement. "I will! I better go. It's getting late.". She made a beeline to where the ship was docked. Lea waved a final goodbye to Colburn before heading inside. Colburn wondered if he'll ever see his beloved sister again. _Of course you will. Snap out of it Cole! _

He shrugged the depressing thought off. He checked the time again. _12 pm. Just in time for lunch._

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-Apollo's cafe-

_Kaidan_

Kaidan sat at the table with Ashley, waiting for their XO to arrive. There was a burning question on his mind. _What's up with Colburn and Ashley?_ He longed for an answer, but couldn't pluck up the courage to ask either of them. Ashley would probably kill him. Colburn was more merciful, but he'd probably end up as a vegetable instead. Both alternatives weren't very encouraging. He took a large gulp of his Canadian lager. _Talk about something else, Alenko. Use your brains. _"You okay, Kaidan? We don't need you getting drunk so early in the day.". Ashley's voice broke his train of thought. _Oh, what the hell. Let's do it._

"Yeah, yeah. I'm just thirsty. Speaking of drinking, I've noticed that you've been binge-drinking with Cole lately."

"Binge-drinking? No, nothing like that. We're just... Having a friendly competition.". A smile found its way up her face.

"You sure it's nothing more than that? You two seem close. Emphasis on _close_."

"_What's your point, Major?_". _Ooh, touchy..._

"Nothing, I swear. Just... Curious is all."

"Curious? Well then, I'm curious about you and Liara too.". Kaidan's eyes widened in surprise. He wasn't expecting this.

"I'm so gonna sew Cole's big fat mouth up!"

"_Really?_ I feel threatened now.". Kaidan spun round to find the man in question smiling at him, though he had a feeling the smile was downright life-threatening.

Cole sat beside Ashley. "So? You gonna do it now, or what?"

_Turn this thing around, Alenko. Use your brains. You're getting ambushed._ "Maybe after I get some answers.". Kaidan put on a sly smile, or at least what the best he could manage.

"Shoot.". _Oh boy, it's payback time._

"I was just asking Miss Williams over here about the exact nature of the relationship between you two.". The duo looked at each other, then burst out laughing. _What the hell?_

"Well then, that's for us to know and for you to find out.". Ashley nodded in agreement. _Am I getting played over here? Play it cool, Alenko._

"Well then, I have to make a guess.". He paused for a moment. "Are you two together?"

"Nope.". The answer came as quickly as the question was asked.

"You guys are lying. You can't keep stuff like that from me. I know about everything."

"Really?". Colburn's voice was just seething with amusement. _What's so funny?_ "You got any evidence to back up your theory?"

"Okay... Then why are you sitting beside her when there are so many other seats at the table?". _Hah! Bet I got you this time!_

"_Because,_ Major, I don't want to get myself ripped into two by Liara. Asari in love get jealous easily."

"_Riiiight..._ You do know she isn't here right?"

"Earth to Alenko, you do know she's the _Shadow Broker_ right? S-H-A-D-O-W-B-R-O-K-E-R."

"Okay, okay! You win!". Kaidan raised his hands in defeat.

"Try harder next time.". Ashley was _obviously_ amused.

"As XO of the Normandy, I hereby demand that you foot the bill to atone for your sins today."

"Damn straight!". Colburn and Ashley high-fived in victory. Kaidan could only sink his head in shame.

_Better luck next time, Alenko._

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-Zakera Ward, Rodam Expeditions. Ash and Cole are shopping for weapons. Kaidan went to Purgatory.-

_Colburn_

The conversation at Apollo's Cafe had made Colburn nervous. Of course, he had made it light-hearted, but the humour didn't make his uncomfort go away. The truth was that he didn't have an answer. Not even a vague one. Because he himself was unsure of it. Sure, Ashley had been there for him at his lowest. They hit off well. They obviously enjoyed each other's company. But... _This?_

The both of them had denied it outright. But he wouldn't deny that it wasn't possible in the future. He had a feeling she wouldn't too. He stole a glance at the brown-eyed woman. She was checking out a Black Widow. He reverted his gaze back to the Carnifex he held in his hands. It had been years since he was in a relationship. The last one he had was in college. But that was a long time ago, ever since he decided to enlist in the military to escape from _him._ Colburn had already forgotten what it was like to have a significant other. _Don't be an idiot, Cole. It's the Reapers you're talking about. Do you really think you can survive?_

_True... There's no reason to start something_ _that can't have a happy ending. _Colburn jumped at the touch of someone's hand on his shoulder. "Penny for your thoughts?". It was Ashley.

"Make it a million credits. Then we'll see.".

"In your dreams, Colburn. You start blanking out on me, I'll have to send you for a brain check-up."

"Noted."

"Whatever.". Ashley rolled her eyes. "What do you think of this?". She handed the sniper rifle to him.

"Not bad, I suppose.". Ashley sighed, then put the weapon back in place. "You not buying?"

"Too rich for my blood."

"You have beer pockets and champagne taste, my friend." Colburn removed the weapon off the rack again, then walked to the counter. He did something on his Omni-tool, then returned to her. He handed the package over to his companion.

Ashley's mouth hung slightly open. "You..."

"Consider it a gift.".

"Did you notice how many zeros it had on the price tag?". Colburn nodded. "So why did you..."

"Anything for you, Ash. Let's go join Kaidan.".

_Anything for you._


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Ooh. So you guys actually want some romance going on? Maybe I'll make it happen. Maybe not. Or maybe I'll get the two of them together, then kill off one of them or break them up. Muahahahahaha! [Insert evil laughter here] I'm not what you'd call a romance person. Romance, is probably on spot number 1,000 on my priority list. Even going to the toilet is more important. I'm serious. I absolutely despise love, sappy stories, or would roll my eyes when I see those couples getting cosy in the classroom. It's just disgusting. Believe it or not, I'm 16, and I've never, ever had a crush on anyone. Why write Dear Diary you ask? That's because I like to challenge myself. If I manage to write out diary entries as a love-smitten guy, and actually make it convincing, then I get an awesome sense of satisfaction. Same thing for this series. What I write, is exactly the opposite of how I would react in real life. It's just like exploring what-if scenarios that you never get to do in life. Enough with the crapping. Happy reading! Ps: Anyone interested in adding me on Facebook? :D **

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-Citadel Embassies, Udina's office-

_Ashley_

Ashley hated politicians. Sometimes more so than the Reapers. Next to Harbinger, they were on her 'shoot on sight' list. Or rather more specifically, _Udina._ That asshole had made it compulsory for her to attend 'training courses' if she had wanted any chance of redeeming the Williams name and getting a promotion.

_Being a Commander would mean that you have to take charge and responsibility. And responsibility includes dealing with people that control power. And talking to people with power means that you have to learn how to hold your tongue. So if you want that promotion... Think about it, Williams. _Just thinking about what he had said made her mad. She felt as if she betrayed everything she stood for. She had almost refused the insulting offer. _Almost._ Colburn had talked her into it. _This might be the only time you're going to get, Ash. Udina's the only guy who can make this happen now. Give in. It's worth it. Trust me._ And true enough, Udina had kept his word. She was made Lieutenant Commander almost immediately after the completion of that wretched course.

And now that weasel had actually requested for their audience. So they came. But instead, he was nowhere to be seen. His secretary had told them to wait for a bit, and left after serving three cups of coffee. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"You okay?". She turned at the sound of Kaidan's voice. He was watching her with concerned eyes.

"Yeah... Just creeped out by this office I guess.". It was the truth. Anything that had to do with Donnell Udina irked her.

"I wonder what he wants with us."

"Something bad.". They both jerked at the sound of Colburn's voice. His face was uncharacteristically sombre when they heard of the Human Councillor's request. She had only seen this particular expression when they were facing an unknown trap or enemy on missions. She opened her mouth to ask _why_, but got interrupted as Udina's secretary barged in.

"Councillor Udina is ready. Please follow me.". Colburn stood up and followed her without a word. They followed suit. They turned around a few corners, and eventually arrived in front of a large door, fitted with a security scanner, no less. _Why so secretive?_ The doors opened.

"Miles.". _What? Who the hell calls Colburn by his first name?_

The next thing she knew, _Colburn was glowing blue._

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_Colburn_

_No. It can't be him. Can it?_ "Miles.". The spark re-ignited at the all-too-familiar voice. _Calm down, Cole. _Too late, the fuse had been lit. His biotics flared, knee-jerk reaction activated. The voice registered itself in his brain, and linked with the danger he had long ago associated it with. _He charged._

Colburn slammed him into the wall on the far side of the room. He raised a hand, ready to connect it with _his_ face. _Then, the paralysing shock came._ He couldn't move. His whole body was numb. He fell slump on the cold, hard, metallic floor.

He could barely make out the mumbling around him. _What the hell_, a familiar female voice seemed to say. There seemed to be the voice of a man as well. Husky, _and agitated_. He felt someone's fingertips brush his face.

_Black hair. Cognac eyes._

_Then everything went black._

**A/N: How's that for a cliffhanger? :D And, I just re-read Dear Diary. And I have to say, I gagged. No kidding. I went, _who on Earth wrote this disgusting piece of work? Oh right, its me._ Is that a sign that I'm convincing? I hope so. Anyway, just thought I'd give this story a summary so far.**

**Characters so far-**

**Miles Colburn**

**Samantha Traynor**

**Ashley Williams**

**Kaidan Alenko**

**Commander Shepard**

**Karin Chakwas**

**James Vega**

**Joker aka Jeff Moreau**

**EDI**

**Lea Rodriguez**

**Ensign Jason Prangley**

**Urdnot Wreave**

**Primarch Victus**

**Salarian Dalatrass**

**I might kill off some, and add new ones. If you're unclear about any characters, go wiki them. They all belong to the Mass Effect series, except for Colburn and Lea, which are my own imagination. If you guys have any questions or are confused about the plot, feel free to contact me. I'm available 24/7.**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hey guys. Newsflash: Kaidan's dad is Canadian, and his mom is Singaporean! LOLOLOL! To be honest, I feel really epic now! :D Okay, maybe I'm just over-reacting. But that doesn't make it any less awesome. I always thought Kaidan was a cool guy. And Raphael Sbarge did an awesome job portraying him. Enough rambling, let's go. Ps: He's supposed to be a sentinel, but I made him an Adept.**

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-apartment 206-

_Kaidan_

Kaidan's mind was, well, a wreck. It was still struggling to process what had happened. All he knew was that his usually-calm friend had attacked someone on sight, and then got tasered. By Donnell Udina no less. Everything was still a blur, but he was determined to find out why.

His gaze rested on Ashley, who was seated beside a still-unconscious Colburn. She had been at that position ever since they got him back home. _God, how long is she going to sit there?_ Kaidan cleared his throat. "Go get some food. I'll take care of him.".

"I'm fine.". Her reply was curt and swift.

"No, you're not. If you're not hungry, then go get some sleep."

"I told you, I'm fine!". Her voice was loud, and irritation clearly evident.

"No, you're not!". His volume was equally high.

Black eyes met her brown ones, gaze intense. Heavy breathing ensued. They broke away. Kaidan composed himself. _Deep breath, Alenko. Deep breath._ "Ash,", his voice now soft, yet firm. "Go get some rest. I've got it. It's okay.". He placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry. I just-"

"It's fine, Ash. Go to bed."

"Yeah... Okay.". Ashley left the room without another word.

Kaidan sat down, and looked at his friend. He noticed how foreign the younger man looked when he was resting. _Peaceful. Tranquil even._ It was a stark contrast to the usual bright grin, or the scowl that appeared on his features every so often. Even the cruel sneer that he reserved solely for cowards and politicians was more familiar.

_Come on, Cole. Wake up. I need answers._

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_Colburn_

Colburn shot straight up at the first hint of sunlight. His eyes opened, and then shut again almost immediately. The eye-piercing sunlight felt strangely familiar. _Gah! Please don't tell me I'm back at Huerta!_ He opened them again, this time taking caution. He looked around.

Brown sheets... Navy blue curtains... No monitors this time... That picture he took with Sam and Lea... _Home._ Colburn scanned his surroundings. No one else was around. He made a ninety degree turn and planted his feet firmly on the ground, trying to find maximum purchase. He tried standing, but immediately fell back on his bed again. A somewhat familiar numbness overtook him. _Jesus._ Something seemed to be buzzing at the back of his ears.

Something -_no, wait._ _Someone_ - in blue rushed over. "Woah, woah. Careful.". It was female. _Ashley._ She helped him to the nearby couch. "How are you feeling?"

"I've been better, if that's what you're asking. I don't think I remember drinking to the point of no return. Did I?"

"_Tasered_, would be more appropriate.". Colburn's head turned at the sound of that husky voice. _Kaidan._

"What are you talking about?". For a second, he was genuinely confused. Then the memories came back. _A charge, a punch. That neural shock, as if his nerves were set on fire. That familiar face..._ _Him._ "Oh.".

"_Oh,_ huh? Care to explain?". The Adept's tone was accusatory. Colburn had a hunch he didn't even bother to hide his unhappiness.

"It's a long story.". Colburn hoped the conversation would stop right there. He wasn't ready to divulge his past, _not in the least._

"Well, we've got plenty of time. Shepard's heading to Tuchanka to cure the Genophage before coming to get us. So spit it out.". _No such luck._

"You don't trust us?". Ashley's voice was soft, but audible.

"I do. I just...". He stopped mid-sentence. _No more running, Cole._

He took deep breaths. _Pace yourself._

"That monster... He murdered twenty people, _twenty innocent people,_ to save his own skin.". He shuddered as the horrifying image made its way back to his mind.

"_What?_". The sudden confession had elicited a feeling of doubt from Ashley. Thankfully, Kaidan was more composed, though Colburn knew he wasn't much calmer than she was.

"Explain."

"The man's name is Gregory Hutcherson. Rear Admiral, Alliance... And he _was_ my father."

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_Ashley_

_What the hell? _

_Scratch that. What the fuck?_

Ashley had known all along that Colburn was a reserved man. As popular as he was, no one truly knew him in and out. Traynor was the only exception, although Ashley had a feeling the Briton wasn't much better off than the rest of them. The man was observant, to say the least. He knew the favourite food, background, family members, birthday, _almost anything and everyone aboard the Normandy_ at least. But few knew anything about him. They didn't know his birthday, his favourite colour... _Nil_. But Ashley didn't think anyone had noticed that. People just tended to subconsciously think that the galaxy revolved around them. _She knew better._

Just when she got a little closer, when she was beginning to unravel the mystery that was called Miles Colburn, _this got dropped on her?_ But she was determined to get to the bottom of things. Besides, this would probably be a once-in-a-lifetime chance to get to understand him inside out.

"What do you mean, _was_? Did he disown you?". Ashley wasn't able to wrap her head around the notion of getting disowned. She had an exceptionally close relationship with her father. And it tore her apart when he passed on. It still did.

"I cut all ties with him. Then I changed my name. Went to be a merc for a little while, then I enlisted.". _Okay, disowning his father? _That felt even more wrong. She decided to just remain silent and let Kaidan ask the questions.

"Why don't you start from the beginning?".

"Alright."

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"My father, he was a good person. He used to be, that is. He always had a knack for politics. They said I got my genes from him.". Colburn let out a small laugh. She could tell it was used to hide his disappointment. "Everyone called him a good man... But sadly, they still do.". He paused again, as if he was unsure of what to say. Kaidan seemed to notice his discomfort.

"Go on. Tell us what happened."

"That was twelve years ago, when I was sixteen. A family friend... Uncle Ross, I called him. One day, I found him rummaging around in my father's office. I tried to sneak away, but he saw me. He told me he was on a secret mission for the Alliance Council, told me to keep mum. I didn't quite believe him. I threatened to divulge everything to my father if he couldn't prove that his story was legit. He had no choice. He brought me to one of his meetings with the Council. They told me that my father was being secretly investigated corruption. I told them it was impossible. _He was the most honest man in the galaxy_, I said. They assured me that they would make sure justice was served. If he was innocent, he would be acquitted of all charges.". He stopped again. Ashley wondered if it was too much for him to handle.

"And then?". Kaidan nudged him on.

"That day, after I went back home, my father dragged me to his room. Somehow, he knew of the meeting, and that I attended it. Immediately, he confessed. He told me he took forty million credits from the Alliance Funds, but that was because he was desperate. A friend had coerced him to dabble in stocks. He lost twenty million in all."

"What about the other twenty million?"

"He said he used them to seal up the mouths of those that knew. He pleaded with me to not say anything to the Council. He actually cried in front of me. He said he just didn't want to lose everything he had. It was hard not to give in.". Ashley understood his feelings. It would be heart-breaking to see her own dad fall into tears before her. Every child's father was his hero.

"I actually forgave him. I was willing to cover for him. I was wrong. A couple of weeks later, I came home, to actually find him at his study. He always came back later than I did. That night, I read in the papers that Uncle Ross' family of five, their butler, and even their dog were killed. The killer wasn't found. The following week, two more Alliance officials and their families were killed, in the same way. I recognised them. They were part of the investigation team. That particular afternoon, I found him washing his shirt. It had a red stain on it. I asked him why was he washing. He didn't answer me. He just shoved me out of the room. After that, I saw him burn that particular shirt, when he thought no one was looking in the middle of the night.".

"What did you do?". Ashley felt herself dreading what Colburn was about to say.

"Shortly, a Spectre contacted me. He asked if I still wanted to defend my father. He showed me footage of him, shooting them in cold blood. Exactly a bullet each, no more, no less. The blood of a girl sprayed onto his sleeve. It was disgusting. My father just disappeared. Some abomination took his place. The Spectre told me that that monster had actually placed a contract on my head. _Two birds with one stone_, the Spectre explained. There would be no one left to expose his secret, and that his son's death would remove all suspicion off him. It was just sickening to hear. Afterwards, I just ran away without a word. The Spectre took me in under his wing. He trained me to become an assassin, not to make me one, but to teach me how to defend myself against them.".

"Keep your friends close and your enemies closer."

"Yeah. He even introduced me to Zaeed Massani. I became his pupil, and lived a few years as a merc under him."

"I thought you despised mercs."

"Most of them. Zaeed's an exception. He's got character. I felt like Robin Hood from the vids. We'd take orders who were low-life scum, and went for the occasional bounty-hunting. We shared the money with the poor ones on Omega. Those were the good days.". A smile crept up Colburn's face. It was heartening to see him happy. _Focus, Williams!_ But the smile left as fast as it came. "I went to enlist, after three years with Zaeed. I got posted in the Army, even though I applied for the Navy."

"Hold on a sec. If he's a Rear Admiral, that means he's in the army too. Wouldn't you be under his jurisdiction? He would've killed you then."

"I changed my last name. Besides, with so many recruits, it would've been hard for him to find me. And the last thing he would've expected was me to enlist, right under his nose."

"The most dangerous place is the safest?"

"That's right.". Ashley was impressed.

"Where did Colburn come from?"

"It was the closest human name to the Spectre's last name."

"Oh." Ash was slightly surprised to find out the simple, practical reason for his name.

"I got posted to N7 afterwards. During that time, I learnt that he found out about my true identity. Not too long after, I received an offer to become a Spectre. _The first human Spectre_. Zaeed told me something smelled wrong, so I declined."

"And so, _Shepard got the title._"

"Yep."

_Okay, now Ashley was confused. _"Wait a minute. Being a Spectre would mean that the Citadel Council would have to agree. Humanity didn't have a spot yet. How the hell would he manage that?"

"I have no idea. But he definitely had something to do with it. I'm sure of it."

Kaidan chimed in. "Where was Chakwas and Hackett in all of this? They should've been around, right?"

"Sadly, they were good friends with him, and still are. At that time, the Alliance was divided into two, almost like the Iron Curtain during the 20th century. Half trusted him to be innocent. The other was convinced he was guilty. Both of them had believed my father to be innocent, till now."

"How did you manage to get under Hackett's care personally?"

"Somehow, that guy convinced the Admiral that we had a family squabble, so he took me under his charge. It became a stalemate. He was able to keep constant tabs on me, but couldn't do anything since I was under Hackett. It was the closest thing I could get to being a marine. But the Reaper invasion changed everything.". _The silence that followed seemed to say, for better or worse I don't know yet._

"I think we all need time to process.". Obviously, Kaidan couldn't stand the silence more than either of them.

"Yes you do. I'll take care of myself. Go back.". Colburn, still looking out for them after the revelation. Ashley could only imagine how difficult it was for him. Kaidan left almost hurriedly. She still lingered around. "Aren't you going?".

She couldn't control herself any longer. "How long were you planning on keeping this from us if nothing of this happened yesterday?". He didn't answer, but looked away instead. She forced him to look at her in the eye. "Answer me."

"I don't answer hypothetical questions."

"Not good enough.". She pressed on, hoping he would budge. He stayed silent. She just remained still. She would only leave once she had a satisfactory reply.

After what seemed like a few centuries, he finally spoke up, his voice almost inaudible. "Forever."

"Why?"

"That's enough. It's pass my breaking point. Leave."

Ashley could sense that he was keeping himself from lashing out at her. No one had spoken to him like that before. If it were others, he probably would've gutted them even before they finished their question. She left, silent. As she walked back to her apartment, her thoughts went wild. She just didn't understand why he was so reluctant to share. Given her current relationship -_scratch that. __Close friendship_- with him, she expected him to open up more. Then again, she should've seen it coming. _If he wouldn't tell Traynor everything, why would he confide to you_? She was going to have to try harder, she thought.

Ashley entered the bedroom. She was mildly surprised to see her terminal blinking. _Green,_ she thought. Incoming messages. _Wonder who that'll be. _The first one was from Lynn. The second and third were just advertisements on 'Inter-galactic dating sites'. She scrolled to the bottom. There was one from an unfamiliar sender.

The user I-D read: _Greg Hutcherson._

**A/N: That's all, folks! This was _really, really long._**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Hey guys! We now have our seventh subscriber! Welcome aboard, Sheity! I hope it wasn't too dark in the previous chapter. I personally adore twists like that, but I don't know about you guys. Anyway, some of you might be looking forward to fluff, or rather, romance scenes. There most probably will be, but there's going to be very little of it. It's labelled under Adventure & Drama for a reason, instead of Romance. As usual, I'm desperate for comments and reviews. I like it when you guys give me tips on how to do better. **

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_Ashley_

Ashley couldn't fathom why the Rear Admiral wanted to meet her. _In private,_ to boot. _5pm, Dark Star Lounge. _Why not Purgatory? She had an urge to go against Hutcherson's instructions and inform Colburn about the meeting, but her intuition told her it wouldn't do any good. She checked the time. _5.15pm._ If he was really sincere in meeting her, he wouldn't leave till he saw her. What did Colburn call it? _Testing the waters? __Right._

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-Dark Star Lounge-

_Ashley_

Ashley checked the time. _8pm._ _Okay, here goes nothing. _She entered the club. She walked around, trying to look as casual and confident as she could. _Just wait for it... Nice and calm... _But her soldier instincts were running high. If the guy was really what Colburn had said to be, could it be that he was grabbing the opportunity to silence those around him as well?

She didn't know how long she had drifted off. An hour? Fifteen minutes? All she knew was that someone was tapping on her shoulder. She turned around to find an unfamiliar face, but she was sure she had seen it somewhere before. "Miss Williams, I suppose?". _Oh right, that big secret room. __**Greg Hutcherson. **_

_Relax, Williams. Play it cool._ "Yes. That's me."

"I'm pleased to see that you've agreed to meet me. Let me introduce myself. I'm -"

She decided to interrupt him. Who cares? "Yes, I know. I've... Heard about you."

"Oh really? I have a feeling it isn't from the vids.".

Ashley simply nodded her head. "Well then, let's find somewhere more private. I've got a room booked.". He led her to a room at the far side of the bar, where no one was in its shouting range. Ashley had a feeling it was his doing. The older man stopped in front of the door, and stretched out an arm. "After you.". She simply walked past him and sat down on a couch. Normally, she would've remained standing and waited till the superior officer had invited her to sit down. But this was a special case. The man she was dealing with was a potential danger and predator. Colburn had taught her on dealing with these kind of people. _You have to show them that you're confident and that you're completely at ease around them_, he said. _Well, time to apply what you've learnt, Williams._

The Rear Admiral had also made himself comfortable on the couch opposite her. He filled two glasses with a dark red liquid and handed one of them to her. "Wine?", he offered. She accepted it without a word, then stared at it. "Don't worry, it's safe.". _Like hell I'm drinking it._ He took a sip out of his glass and let out a contented sigh. "Mmm... This bottle of 47' Thessia Red _is_ worth the ten thousand credits.".

Ashley couldn't stand it anymore. "Just tell me what the hell you want."

"Ah yes. I'm sorry. Let me get to business. Actually-". He got interrupted by a knock on the door. A man of Asian descent appeared. Long bangs, shades, dressed in black. _Why the hell would he wear shades? As if it isn't dark enough in here already. _

"Tim is looking for you.". His voice was deep and sophisticated, _classy even._ _The perfect candidate for undercover missions._ Ashley had a feeling many woman would fall to the seductive voice. _But certainly not her._

"Excuse me.". Hutcherson stepped out of the room, and took a ear piece from the man in black. Whoever _Tim_ was, he had to be pretty important, because the Rear Admiral was speaking in a respectful and patient tone. _Or at least he appeared to be. _

Ashley took the chance to deeply study Hutcherson's features. Hutcherson had pitch black hair, and black eyes. His hair was neatly combed back, prim and proper. And it was obvious that he had put in quite some concern over his appearance in public. The fine suits that would've cost more than six months of her salary, good mannered, respectful, gentlemanly. Ashley was starting to doubt if he was the person Colburn had been speaking about. _It's all pretense, Williams. Use your brains!_

Colburn's appearance was more rugged. Cropped, layered hair that just touched the collar of his uniform, long fringe tousled and parted at the left, slightly overlapping his right eye. _Messy._ He didn't look like an XO of a ship, or even an Alliance soldier for that matter. _You look like a shipwreck instead of a soldier_, Anderson had once complained. But no one really took action about it. Hair was too little of an issue to take note. _Shepard had once stolen the Alliance's frigate for crying out loud._

But there were the similarities too. Both of them had a knack for politics. It was obvious. She'd seen Hutcherson, or at least heard of him, influencing Citadel decisions by throwing his weight around. Colburn, needless to say, had been coaching her and Kaidan, as well as Shepard on the way with words and people. _People with power_. _At the Citadel, words are powerful, sometimes more than those of Thanix Cannons. _He taught them how to stay out of trouble, how to work their way out of political traps and the lot. _Make people believe you're crazy. Convince them that you'd do anything to get your way. You know you're a professional when you're able to make people forget that they've got the upper hand and force them to comply to your terms at the end, while tricking them to believe that they've won at the same time. _Sometimes, Ashley simply marvelled at the way Colburn handled diplomatic matters for the Normandy. Every time Udina seemed to find a way to charge one of them with a fault, he'd get them out unscathed, _with ease. _Sometimes Ashley thought of actually nominating him for Earth Councillor instead of Udina, though she knew that he loathed politics more than any of them. If it weren't for them, she was sure that he would cut off all ties with the political world.

Ashley glanced at Hutcherson. He was still talking. Again, she let her mind drift to Colburn, _the mystery man. _She couldn't comprehend why he was so reluctant to let anyone inside his mind. She could understand if he wanted more privacy. Some people were just more sensitive than others. _But this was ridiculous. _To keep this secret away from the rest of the galaxy? That was just insane. She knew she wouldn't be able to do that. Then again, she'd rather _not_ be in his shoes. Her father a selfish bastard? _No way. _If she wanted Colburn to open up, even if to Traynor and not her, she would have to do something.

She snapped back to reality at Hutcherson's voice. "I'm sorry. Where was I?". The man in black was gone.

"To be honest, we haven't even started."

"My apologies, Miss Williams. First of all, I appreciate you coming out of your way to Zakera Ward. I thought of meeting at Purgatory, but I couldn't risk anyone finding out about this. I'm sure you're wondering why I've requested to meet you in private."

_Two can play at this game. _"Actually sir, _with all due respect, _I think I do. And to address your worries, if anyone found out about this, you can just put a bullet through their heads.". Ashley paused for a moment, to let the unspoken threat sink in. She kept her eyes locked on his shoulders. If he moved an inch, she'd know what he was going to do. "_Like twelve years ago._".

Hutcherson seemed unsurprised. Her statement merely elicited an _ah_ from the General. "Yes, I should've expected that he would've told you about me."

"Then you obviously don't know him."

"Oh. _Do you, _Miss Williams?"

"Most probably better than you anyway."

"True, true.". Hutcherson seemed amused at her answer. _That look..._ _Yep, definitely Cole's dad._

_Don't lose it, Williams. _"We're digressing."

"You're correct. Thank you for reminding me. Let me get to the point: The whole matter is a total misunderstanding."

"What makes you think I have to take your word for it? Besides, no murderer would admit that he killed a person, much less twenty."

"I didn't kill them. Besides, haven't they all said that you shouldn't listen to only one side of the story? Even a convicted prisoner gets the opportunity to speak his peace before the execution."

"_Fine._ Just get straight to it. We're running in circles."

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-Apartment 206-

_Colburn_

Everything was still a mess to Cole. They lingering ache didn't help. Neither did Kaidan. Kaidan had came over with an _unpleasant_ surprise.

"Kaidan, please tell me this is some kind of sick joke."

"I wish it was, Cole. But it's not."

"I can feel my sanity decreasing at FTL speed, _if there's actually anymore left, that is._"

"Nice to see you haven't lost your sense of humour."

Cole rolled his eyes. "Don't make me ask you about Asari-Human mating experiences."

Kaidan immediately held up his hands in a placating gesture. "Okay, okay! Just lay off already!".

Colburn held out the victory sign in glee. Kaidan stuck out his tongue. _Yes!_ And Colburn instantly kept his friend in stasis. A look of alarm barely managed to find a spot on Kaidan's face before the stasis took over. Colburn flashed an all-too-innocent smile, and put his thumbs and index fingers together as if he were taking a photo. "I think Liara's going to love this. _You look absolutely gorgeous, Kaidan!_ Or maybe it's just my excellent photography skills.".

Colburn's short reverie of happiness ended when Ashley entered the apartment. Unfortunately, _or rather, fortunately_, he didn't know it yet. "Hey, Ash. Come check out my new sculpture!"

"Ooh. I think we have our own Michaelangelo from the 22nd Century!"

And while they were laughing, Colburn got a little too distracted, and the stasis' grip weakened. Kaidan managed to break out. _Oh crap._ The adept was ready to give the 'sculptor' a biotic falcon punch of his own, but Colburn managed to find a lifebuoy. "Woah there now! We've got more important business to discuss.". _Nice save, Cole. Not too shabby._

"What's that?"

"We've received an invitation to attend the Council Alliance Summit."

"What the hell is that?"

"An inter-galactic conference, at least among the Citadel races, that is."

"What for?"

"Seems like they've finally figured out that the Reapers were actually real.". Colburn's words were dripping with sarcasm. He couldn't help it. The Citadel Council seemed to be made up of dense and incredibly thick-headed people. The average Elcor would probably be smarter. "So they've summoned for this summit to work out a plan. But believe me, I'm not holding my breath."

"Why us?".

"Good question. That's what Kaidan asked me too.". Kaidan simply glared at him. _Oops._ "As part of the Citadel Council, humanity needs to attend too. Since Hackett's leading the fleets, Anderson's on Earth, and Shep's on Tuchanka, we have to take their place instead."

"What about Udina?"

"Udina's representing Earth. We're there because we've seen how the Reapers attack first-hand."

"I have a feeling there's something more.". Colburn stayed silent. He just couldn't get it out of his mouth.

Luckily, Kaidan spoke for him. "Hutcherson's there too, as advisor to Udina.".

**A/N: Just a filler. The real kicker's coming up real soon. Any reviews? I've got only one. They encourage me to write faster. Just saying. :p **

**Ps: If you have trouble imagining Cole's hair, I'll admit, it resembles Adam Lambert's. Was an inspiration for Cole's appearance. But of course, dear Cole here doesn't do eyeliner.**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: I am absolutely mesmerised with Temple Run! It's out for Android! Yay! I've always loved the game, and would hog my sister's iPhone just to play it. Just to be clear, I absolutely hate anything that starts with an 'i' or anything that's from Apple inc. I just hate it. Now all I need is for Cause Of Death to be released for Android and I'll be a very happy person. Just an update, my exams start this Thursday, so there will be probably two chapters uploaded, including this, before this story goes on a two week hiatus or so. As usual, I appreciate the support, though I would _really really really_ like some reviews going on. I might not be posting during those two weeks, but I check my email everyday. :p **

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Ashley

The revelation was shocking, to say the least_. What? He didn't mention this at Dark Star just now. _"Ash, you okay?". Apparently, Ashley's expression must've been quite loud if Colburn was actually snapping his fingers in front of her.

"Yeah, yeah. Just..."

"Yeah, I get it. I was the one who received the invitation."

"What?". Ashley looked at Kaidan in horror. Or maybe amusement. Maybe both.

"What _'what'_? I have an Extranet account mind you. Do I look like someone from the stone age?"

"Colburn to Alenko and Williams! I'm the worst off, okay? Stop complaining."

"And why is that? We're all in this together you know.". Ashley had a feeling whatever was coming up next was going to be very amusing. And stupid.

"Well, as representative of the Normandy as well as Shepard, I'll be doing all the talking instead of you guys. You two are just there for decoration! This is _so unfair_!". The soldier and adept had their mouths hung wide open. Apparently, Colburn felt _really_ indignant. "What? I'm correct! Unless you guys want to talk. I'm more than happy to give up my position."

"Never mind. You win. I've gotta go back. See you guys tomorrow.". Kaidan hurriedly exited the apartment. Ashley could see that he was doing his best to not run away. _He's really afraid of those people, isn't he?_

"Nah. He's just anxious to see Liara.". _Okaaaaaay... Can he read my mind?_

"How do you know?"

"I know everything, Ash."

"Prove it."

"You sure?"

"I bet you don't have the balls to."

"Well then, I hoped you enjoyed that bottle of 47' Thessia Red. It's good stuff."

_What the hell? _"Wh-what?"

"You heard me."

_Oh boy, I'm so screwed._

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_Colburn_

Colburn was angry. _Really, really angry._ The only thing that kept him from screaming at Ashley was well, _her._ "Were you ever going to tell me?". Ashley kept quiet. "I trusted you, Ashley. And I expect you to trust me too. I've told you. He isn't a good man. He could've sent assassins after you. The Presidium's not really safe even though C-Sec's around. And you even went to Zakera Ward...". Colburn ran out of words to say. No amount of rambling could ever do justice to the disappointment he was feeling.

"How did you know?"

"Don't digress. Why, Ash?"

"What did you want me to do? We should give him a chance to explain himself. Even war criminals get to speak their side of the story on trial."

"No thief ever admits that he stole. What on Earth did he tell you? Why are you defending him?"

"What if he was framed? You couldn't have known! Besides, if he really was guilty, they should've had enough evidence to convict him!"

"So what? Are you taking his word over mine now?"

"I don't know, Cole! I just don't want you to lose your father for nothing!".

"He's not my father anymore, Ash! I've made that quite clear!".

Ashley punched him, right across the face. Colburn's eyes widened at the sudden act of violence. Something warm trickled down from the edge of his lips. "I lost my father, Cole. There were many things I wished I said to him before he left, to see him in his final moments. But I couldn't. I didn't get that chance. You're different.". She gently touched his face with her fingers. He didn't refuse. "There's always that possibility that he was wronged, no matter how small that probability is. It's still possible. And I don't want to you to lose him because of a stupid misunderstanding.". Ashley's voice was soft now. Colburn's heavy breathing subsided. "What if... What if the Spectre was wrong?"

"He'd never frame anyone."

"I'm not saying he did. Maybe he was lied to as well."

"Ash, listen to me. He's not the same as your dad. Your dad was a good man. He died in the line of duty. _He's_ different. They're worlds apart."

"How?"

"The guy's an actor. He knows how to get to you. He just wants us to fall out so that he can divide and conquer."

"Cole-"

"I've been with him for sixteen years of my life. Don't tell me I don't know him.". Ashley tried to counter, but he cut her off again. He had to make it clear that he wasn't wrong about the damn bastard. "You have to trust me, Ash. I know what I'm talking about.". Ashley stayed silent. "Listen, go sleep. The summit's tomorrow."

"But your face-"

"I'll be fine.".

Colburn stood up and gestured for Ashley to take his hand. He led her out to the door. "Listen, Cole. I'm sorry I-"

He shushed her with an embrace. Something in his mind told him it wasn't really appropriate, but he didn't care. "I told you, it's fine.", he whispered into her ear. He felt her arms hold him tighter. It was comforting, the hug. But he knew he had to stop before it went out of hand. He released his hold. Slowly, she did too. "Go get some rest.". He nudged her towards the neighbouring apartment.

Ashley made her way to her own apartment. She turned her head and whispered a "Good night".

"Sleep tight.". He watched her close the door before shutting his. As he made his way to the bedroom, he couldn't help but sigh.

_Tomorrow's gonna be horrible._

**A/N: I hope it was cheesy enough for you guys, because it sure was for me. Looking forward to your reviews soon.**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Wow. Okay. I'm a little overwhelmed right now. Firstly, a warm welcome to dahellraider as our eighth subscriber. Secondly, I appreciate that good-wishes, as well as the three reviews. Yay! Anyway, to answer your questions, this series is AU. Wrex didn't die because Shepard shot him. He was in charge of the nuclear bomb on Virmire. Both Ash and Kaidan were with the STG. To save the Salarians, Shep had no choice but to sacrifice Wrex. So, yeah. Hope their clears all doubts. If you still have queries, feel free to ask. I'm more than happy to oblige. Anyway, I'm doing my best to keep the characters as authentic as possible. If Ash gets too emotional, or whatever, tell me about it. Thanks.**

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-Next day, a few hours before the summit. Kaidan's apartment-

_Kaidan_

"That's an... Interesting revelation.".

"Aw come on, Liara. This whole thing doesn't faze you?"

"Kaidan, I'm the _Shadow Broker,_ remember?"

"So wait. _You actually knew about this?_"

"I knew about the relationship between Hutcherson and Colburn, yes. But I didn't know about the crimes he did. The Alliance was surprisingly successful at keeping the whole incident a secret."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Business is business, Kaidan. Everything has a price. This was his past. It's not very appropriate to divulge to everyone is it? Besides, he had took precautions to let it remain a secret. He even offered to pay me."

"What did you do?"

"I might be the Shadow Broker, _but I'm Liara T'Soni as well_. I treasure my friends, especially a good one like him. I did him the favour. I didn't take the money."

"Yeah. Okay.". Kaidan didn't know what else to say. _Something, Alenko. Something._ "So uh, when are you guys coming?"

"We're already on our way to the Citadel. A few more hours maybe. But definitely today."

"Maybe you guys can come back in time for the party as well. I have a bad feeling about this. Colburn's got enough on his shoulders, but we can't do anything to help him. Maybe I should change my name to _Burden Alenko_ instead."

"Kaidan... The best thing you can do for him right now is stay silent. That's doing him a favour. Out of all of us, he's the best politician. Believe it or not, the Citadel is _his_ playground. _He was born to handle situations like these, and he knows it._ He doesn't trust anyone to do the job but himself. All you have to do is trust him."

"Yeah, okay."

"I'll see you later, alright?"

"Yeah. Sure.". The terminal screen faded black.

_Alright, Alenko. Pull yourself together. You can do this._

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_Ashley_

Ashley was still trying to understand what happened the night before. _The hug..._ _What did it mean? He just needed comfort, you twat. There are regs against this sort of stuff, Williams. Think straight! _

_Deep breath... Deep breath..._ Ashley paced herself before stepping out of her apartment. Colburn was already standing outside. He was in Alliance dress blues, with hair surprisingly neat. _And deep in thought._ Kaidan still wasn't out yet. _Natural, Williams. Natural._ "What are you thinking about?" Colburn slightly jumped at her voice. _He must be really deep in thought_. He didn't answer. _Then it's most probably Hutcherson_. "It's going to be fine. You're here.". She tried to sound as comforting as possible, though she wasn't sure if she sounded convincing.

"Nothing ever goes right with me around."

"That's not true."

"I'm not confident about the summit later on."

"You'll do great."

"I'm not so sure about that."

"Why?"

"That day... When I lost control and just charged him... It's a mess. We were lucky there was no one else around. I always thought I was able to keep myself in check. But I couldn't. I just lost it. What if I do something stupid later on? This time in front of the whole bunch of inter-galactic representatives."

"It's going to be fine. Trust me."

"Yeah, okay. I've got this.".

As if on cue, Kaidan came out. "Sorry to keep you waiting. I- Ooh. Looking good, Cole."

"Whatever.". Colburn rolled his eyes. She could tell he was uncomfortable in those kind of clothing.

"Come on, let's go. Transportation's waiting for us."

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_Colburn_

Colburn had never felt more jittery. Conferences were a staple, but one with _him_ wasn't. His clothes didn't help. He hated the outfit. In his dictionary, dress blues were a sign that you're starting to be more of a pencil-pusher rather than a soldier. And he didn't like.

They had finally arrived at the conference hall. The doors opened. Showtime. The three of them were immediately ushered to their seats, which was labelled under 'Human, Systems Alliance'. He looked around. Primarch Victus, Salarian Dalatrass, Asari Councillor... Surprisingly, the Batarians were around too. So were the Elcor, Drell, and Wreav wasn't present though. _Too busy mating I guess. _Oddly, Udina was absent. _So is he._

Everyone was whispering about. _What could they be up to? _The opening of doors hushed the room. Udina stepped in, _him_ by his side. They took their seats alongside the Citadel Councillors. "Let the summit begin!"

A few hours passed. _Two? Five?_ Colburn didn't know. As far as he knew, they were just beating about the bush. It would probably take them decades to finally get to the main point. He would've punched them in the face and get it over and done with, but this was the largest Citadel meeting to date. Such a bold move would surely have serious repercussions. Normally, he couldn't care less, but with the Reapers around, he would have to bite his own tongue instead of snipping off theirs. He _-they-_ couldn't afford to screw this up.

He snapped back to reality as he felt someone nudge him. It was Ashley. "What's up?", he whispered. They couldn't be seen not paying attention.

"There's this man in black, Asian. He's here. I saw him when I met Hutcherson."

"What's so wierd?". Colburn scanned his surroundings. _Asian? Could it be... No, it can't be... Right?_

"He was wearing shades at Dark Star. Not only that, he brought a phone call to Hutcherson. The guy's name is Tim, I think. Sounds like a big-shot."

Colburn finally found the man Ashley mentioned. The man was hiding in the shadows, counting down with his fingers. _Tim? T-I-M. _He pieced the puzzle together. _The Illusive Man!_ He screamed just as the man counted down to _one_.

_"Ceberus!"_

A loud explosion followed. His head was ringing, but he couldn't care less. He scrambled to his feet and looked around. The Councillors were coughing, but they were fine.

"What's going on, Cole?". Kaidan was already up and helping Ashley stand.

"Ceberus, that's what!". Colburn took a glance across the whole room. The rest were either lying on the floor unconscious, or sputtering from the smoke. He searched for security. The guards were all out. _An inside job._ He took three pistols from the fallen guards, and handed two to Ashley and Kaidan. "Ash, go get the Councillors to safety. Kaidan, go to C-Sec headquarters. Bailey's going to need the help. They're most probably under attack by troopers already."

"Got it!". Kaidan rushed his way towards the headquarters.

"What about you?". Ashley was starting to help the Councillors get to their feet. Colburn spotted Hutcherson making his way towards the side exit. _Bastard._ Kai Leng wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"I'm gonna go get the bastards who did this.". He immediately gave chase even before finishing his sentence.

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_Kaidan_

The headquarters was a sight for sore eyes. The guards were already being overwhelmed by the time kaidan got there. Even though the situation had improved since his arrival, things were still looking grim. One by one, the C-Sec officers fell. The force of the Ceberus troopers were just too much to handle. Only Bailey and him were left. They managed to find a safe spot, but they couldn't hold out for long unless help arrived. _Soon._

As if someone up there had heard his prayers, a familiar blue Kodiak shuttle appeared out of no where. _Shepard!_ The squad of three made quick work of the Ceberus forces, who were caught offguard. "You can come out now.". The familiar voice had brought a sudden rush of safety inside Kaidan.

Kaidan helped Bailey, who was shot in the leg, to get up. "Thanks, Shepard. You saved our asses back there.". Alongside the Commander was Garrus as well as EDI.

"What's going on?"

"We were at the summit, then Ceberus just launched an all-out invasion on us.".

Just then, Colburn's voice crackled in their earpieces. "Shepard! Thank God you're here!"

"Cole! What's your status?"

"Never mind me. _It's your friend, Thane._"

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_Colburn_

"He's... Severely wounded. _I don't think he's going to make it._". He looked at the Drell. The wound was horrible. It was deep, and bleeding heavily. The Drell was only panting heavily, though Colburn knew it was a whole lot worse than he let on.

"Shepard... Don't mind me. I've been through worse. You have to get to Udina! He's working with Ceberus!". Thane started to breathe even more heavily. Talking was clearly taking its toll on him.

"_What?_ That greaseball!".

"Shep, you've got to get to Ashley asap! She's protecting them. Udina's gonna shoot them all at the back!"

"On it! Can't you get her through the comm?"

"I couldn't get through. Ceberus must have jammed her signal!"

"I'll get to her. Don't worry.". Shepard disconnected.

Colburn turned his attention to the wounded assassin. "We have to get you help!". _He just didn't know how._

"I'll live. Don't worry. You have to get that Ceberus assassin and that human traitor!"

Colburn made a decision. Although he hated it, he knew it had to be done. "Alright. You hang in there.".

And he was gone.

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_Colburn_

_Left turn... Right corner..._ Colburn had caught sight of Hutcherson and immediately gave chase. Kai Leng, on the other hand, was nowhere to be seen. That bastard was fast, nimble even. In front of him, Hutcherson seemed to stop. The older man spun around, a smile playing on his lips. Colburn instinctively pointed his pistol at him. "I must say, you're a persistent young man."

"What can I say? A chip off the old block."

"I certainly don't remember you being so humorous."

"People change. Like how a respectable Rear Admiral degraded to a low-life weasel."

"But, you're still so short-sighted, as always."

"Stop playing games."

"Did you know why I named you Miles? Because I had a vision. A vision of you soaring to great heights, embarking on the journey to success! But I was wrong. You're just as useless as the rest of the galaxy. _So disappointing._"

"_You're the disappointment. _A traitor, back-stabbing humanity when you should be helping us!"

"Well then, since you're so self-righteous. _Shoot me._". _Fine._ But Colburn couldn't seem to pull the trigger. He just couldn't. After all those years of training, running, preparing for the showdown that was happening right now. He realised he couldn't. "I knew you couldn't. You just can't. _Useless, as always._".

Colburn felt something hard hit the back of his head.

_All went dark._

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_Ashley_

"You know me, Ash! You know I'm better than this!". Never would Ashley had thought that she would point her gun at Shepard. Or that Shepard would point his in her direction as well.

"_I knew the old Shepard! _I don't know who you are."

Kaidan's voice came to life from her earpiece. "Ash! He's speaking the truth. The intel came from Cole!".

_What?_ Shepard lowered his gun, and gestured for Garrus and EDI to do the same. "_Ash, please._ I'm better than this. _You're better than this._"

_Here goes nothing. _Ashley could barely muster a mutter. "I'm gonna regret this."

A smile of relief appeared on Shepard's face. "No, you're not."

"Udina, step away from the console!"

"To hell with this.". Udina's fingers flew over the commands faster than ever. The Asari Councillor stopped him. He took out a gun. She shot him, without hesitation.

"God damn it... Bastard...". She looked over to Shepard. He gave her a nod of approval.

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-Normandy-

_Shepard_

Shepard was frantic. Desperate even. They had found Thane, lying on the ground, almost bleeding to death. The Drell had managed to say that the Captain had went after Hutcherson and the Ceberus assassin before passing out. It had been five hours since the attempted coup ended, but Colburn was still nowhere to be found.

Ashley was worse off. She had been pacing about the Observation Room. He had ordered everyone back to the Normandy to get some rest, while the Citadel reinforcements were sent to look for their missing XO. _Damn it Cole. Where the hell are you?_

Just then, Liara entered the room. "Shepard... I have news on our friend.". Her expression told him it wasn't good news.

"EDI, tell everyone to meet at the conference room."

"Yes, Commander."

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_Traynor_

_Where's he gone to this time?_ Traynor's heartbeat was most probably faster than the speed of light. Colburn had never been one to leave without a word. Even when he wanted solitude, he would always leave a message. The fact that Shepard's expression was grim didn't help much. But Liara was the one who spoke.

"I've received a vid-mail from an anonymous sender. It took me quite a bit to decipher the encryption code, but it's done now. Prepare yourselves.". The Asari played a video from her Omni-tool.

It showed Hutcherson, in _Ceberus uniform._

"Good day, Commander. I'm sure you must be wondering where your beloved Executive Officer went. Well, he's with me." The camera switched to reveal Colburn, shirt tattered and beaten up, tied to a chair no less. His face was marked with bruises, though Traynor had a feeling it was just the tip of the iceberg. "Well, I hope you're enjoying what's in front of you. He's not such a pretty face now, is he?".

Someone slammed the table. Everyone turned around at the deafening sound. It was Ashley. "Bastard! That's his own son!". Kaidan placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, trying to calm her down. But Traynor could see his own anger was barely contained.

"If you wish to save him, take care that the longer you delay, the slimmer his chances of survival are. I'm warning you. _Noveria is very, very cold._ Good luck."

**A/N: This was ridiculously long. I might not be so cruel as to let you guys suffer from a cliffhanger for two weeks. Anyway, let me know of what you guys think, especially now that something gigantic happened. Please with a cherry on top! :p **


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hey guys! Thank you all for the support. I'm actually surprised that you guys like the plot twists so much. I'm a sucker for stories with drastic turns. **

**Colburn getting kidnapped was actually a product of frustration with the writing of other authors. Not that they suck, mind you. Their writing are pretty darn good. It's just that, when it comes to OCs, many paint them in such a positive light to the extent that they're more incredible than Edna Mode. It's sickening sometimes. **

**They're handsome, pretty, charming, smart, sarcastic, able to fend off a million Reapers single-handedly, and not sweat. Most importantly, they seem to know absolutely everything that's going to happen. It's horrible. It's disgusting. There, I said it out loud. I strive for realism in my story. Or at least try to. I don't if it's safe to say that I'm actually successful in doing that.**

**Everyone has flaws, except for Shepard :p The part where Cole couldn't find the will to shoot his father... I wanted to add a touch of reality with that. I mean, no matter how big a crime or mistake your parents make, no matter how much you want them to be put to justice, there's just no way for you to shoot them point blank. Someone else has to do the job. Arrest them, yes. It's possible. Kill them? I don't think so. I'll probably break down right in front of them or something.**

**Also, I wanted to showcase that Colburn isn't omniscient, nor is he invincible. People get the jump on him. I mean, he's just a guy right? He doesn't have voodoo magic or a crystal ball or anything. He doesn't have the ability to take down a group of fifty mercs by himself too. It's just absurd. No one doesn't fall in battle not even once. Hell, Shep died. There's no such thing as undefeatable in my dictionary. **

**I wanted to let his strengths and weaknesses surface. Sure, he knows what to say in front of politicians. Yes, he usually calculates risks before he makes a move. But I'm sure everyone has that one thing that really gets to us right away, right? For Cole here, it's definitely Hutcherson, and Udina. Maybe Wreav too. Okay, the Salarian Dalatrass as well. I wanted to contrast his actions when he's around his father as compared to when he's around Shepard and Co.**

**And I think I mentioned in Traynor's POV once about Cole locking a huge part of the real him away from the rest of the galaxy. I plan to build and elaborate on his trust issues, as I think it's a great outlet to expand his background and character without deviating from the storyline.**

**Oh yes, let's talk about romance. As I've said before, I may or may not make Cole and Ash get together officially. I'm keeping their relationship ambiguous so that there's more room for possibilites and expansion in future. Besides, I don't think that they've spent enough to truly feel that they're made for each other. In case you haven't noticed, both of them take relationships very seriously. Again, it's on the topic of realism. Romance isn't really just "I love you, you love me. Let's just ignore the rest of the world.". No. There are many factors to have a thing going. Your job, financial stability, opinions by your parents and family and friends, your significant other's relationship with them... The list runs long. So... Yeah. Also, Ash doesn't know Cole inside out yet. He's still a mystery. Sure, you'd date someone you get along with just fine, like that hot guy/girl you met at the bar. But you don't marry that person without knowing about his/her background right? At least I hope you guys don't.**

**Lastly, let's talk about Shepard. In case you haven't noticed, I don't give Shep a first name. _Never, ever will._ A first name just ruins his/her mystique, don't you think? I personally feels that it reinforces the feeling of him as the mascot for humanity and survival. Yes, the whole galaxy recognises him on sight, but few actually _know_ him. He's still far away no matter how close you're sitting next to him. And, as he's a spacer, lovely Hannah Shepard will make an appearance. I've already planned for her entrance. Don't worry, you'll see her more than once. I promise. The mother of the galaxy's saviour deserves more than just a puny cameo right?**

**Speaking of which, I like to highlight that, even though Shep and Cole are leaders, they're just the guy next door as well. Yes, leaders are supposed to act calm and cool. But they still do feel afraid, insecure and scared. They just don't show it. That's what makes them different from us. They just carry everything on their shoulders no matter how much they loath it. **

**Chapter 15 is on it's way. What can I say? I'm soft-hearted :p It'll be posted before the weekend, I promise. Again, I want to thank you guys for the support. Keep the reviews rolling please. I enjoy them a lot, and they motivate me to update regularly. And I'm kinda proud of this series now. Eight subscribers? That's a huge jump from Dear Diary's three. Let's aim for ten shall we? If you don't mind, help me advertise this to your friends or something. (What can I say? I'm shameless and thick-skinned).**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Aloha people! I don't know if it's you guys at work, or it was a coincidence, but I've got two new subscribers just a few hours after the previous post. If if it's because of one your recommendations, thanks to whoever you are. :D A warm welcome to our ninth and tenth subscribers, darkerego & TexanHusker! We've reached ten! Yay! Anyway, this is the fifteenth chapter. Hope you guys like it.**

**Edit: Do add me on Facebook. I'm not going to just display my name out here. If you're interested, send me a private message. It's easier for me to notify you guys if anything drastic happens, which is entirely possible. Such as my mother confiscating my phone and thus, no more stories for all of us. :( So, yes. I entirely encourage adding me on Facebook. But if you guys aren't comfortable about giving a stranger your Facebook, I'll understand. It's just that I've gotten used to adding friends. That's what gaming online does to you :p **

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_Colburn_

Colburn woke up to a stinging sensation in his left thigh. _Fucking hell!_ He instinctively let out a loud yelp. "_Well, well, looks like our big baby's awake._". The sound made him wince. It wasn't particularly loud, but the ringing in his ears made it jarring. Colburn rapidly blinked his eyes to get a clearer vision. He looked up to find Kai Leng's face just inches apart from his. _The bastard was smiling._ As if on instinct, Colburn headbutted him. The assassin stumbled a few steps backwards. Kai Leng let out a low grunt as he touched his forehead with his fingers. "Hmph, guess the N7 training did you some good.". His words were obviously meant to mock Colburn, but the vanguard knew that it was meant to hide his surprise at the sudden act of defiance rather than insult him.

"Wish I could say the same for you, but seems like Ceberus made you soft.". He could feel The Illusive Man's right-hand man glare at him from behind the opaque visor. "What? It's the truth. You're as soft as tofu!". Colburn made sure to spit every single syllable out in the operative's face.

"You want to know what's soft? I'll show you soft!". Kai Leng activated the taser again. A bright electric blue came to life at its tip. He jabbed it, _hard,_ into the Captain's left thigh. Colburn immediately clamped on his tongue, but he kept his eyes locked on the man that used to be part of his squad. Kai Leng was trying to make him scream. He couldn't give in. Other than losing the pride fight, if Ceberus was recording the entire process, _which they most probably were_, they would surely send it to Shepard. And the Commander would definitely rush over to rescue him if they saw him agony, _and right into the organisation's ambush_. _You can do it. Hang on. _

Colburn felt the voltage increase. Slowly, but steadily. "Scream, God damn it!". The assassin whipped out a small dagger and stabbed Colburn's right thigh, _hilt deep__._ Colburn felt the pain flare up, as if the wound was on fire. He bit his tongue harder. It started to bleed. He forced his eyes to not waver and had them firmly planted on Kai Leng's face. He wasn't afraid of him, and he wanted to prove it. _Hang on, it's gonna stop soon._ He wasn't lying to himself. He knew they really would stop. Prolonged exposure to a strong electric current would result in death, and if he died, Ceberus would lose a valuable bargaining chip. With him dead, there would also be no stopping Shepard and his whole team from launching an all-out assault on Ceberus. Ceberus wouldn't be able to stop him, and they knew that.

Every second felt like a century. One minute seemed to last a millennia. Slowly, he started to lose his confidence. _What if they didn't need him? Had he overestimated his own value?_ He was about to give up, when he felt the sting cease. _Good call._ A deep voice captured his attention. _Just as well, something to distract him from the pain_. "Ah. Bonding with our guest, Mr Leng?". _Maybe not. _

"Just trying to know your son better, Mr Hutcherson.". Kai Leng was obviously annoyed at the sudden interference.

"What can I say? Kai over here likes playful banter. He loves me to bits."

"Shut up!". Kai Leng gave him a punch on the cheek. _That got his attention._ Colburn responded by spitting the mixture of saliva and blood in his face. "Son of a bitch!". Kai Leng raised a hand to give another blow, but it got intercepted by Hutcherson. "Watch your place, Hutcherson! You're working for us now! Are you feeling the heartache?"

"I don't work for _you,_ rat. I work _with_ The Illusive Man. You better watch your tongue.". That seemed to shut him up. Time for round two.

"I always knew you were a wuss, but _this?_ Total obedience to Timmy? Like a lapdog? _Really?_ I'm starting to respect you for that personal low!"

"Don't push your luck, coward."

"Who's the coward now? Who ran away on the Citadel? And an _incompetent_ coward to that! You couldn't even defeat a Drell with Kepral's Syndrome! I wonder if Timmy's really that smart as Shepard claimed him to be. Hiring you as an assassin? Nah. I think he's just trying to find a substitute for Shepard. Then again, you'll never match up to him. Or maybe you're meant to be a substitute for Lawson instead! I don't think he could get laid after she resigned. Tim a gay? Oh my, that's fascinating. You guys ever-".

"Bastard!". The biotic's hands glowed blue. _Bull's-eye!_ Kai Leng raised a fist, but seemed to regain some sense of rationale at the last minute. "You're just plain lucky that we need you for Alc-"

"Enough!". Hutcherson had interrupted the assassin mid-sentence. "You will _not_ want to incur the wrath of The Illusive Man.". Hutcherson wasn't talking to Colburn, but to Leng instead. "The final execution is at plan. We can't mess it up.". That said, he revealed a syringe hidden in his sleeve, and promptly injected their captive at the neck.

_Colburn fell back into the familiar abyss of darkness._

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_Shepard_

To say that Shepard was feeling stupid would be a gross understatement. He knew that Hutcherson revealing the location of their captured colleague was something too good to be true. But they didn't have a choice. Even if it was a trap, they would still have to take their chances. There was nowhere else to look for clues. Shepard's mind went back to Huerta. There he was, sending a cherished friend on his final journey across the sea. But even to his last breath, Thane had made sure to pray. Not for himself, but for Shepard, as well as Colburn.

_Have you had any news about your missing friend?_

_Yes, but it isn't good._

_Do not worry, Shepard. The gods look out for those who have sacrificed for the greater good. Oh, Goddess Kalahira. This one's heart is pure, but set by wickedness and contention. Guide him to where the traveler never tires, where the lover never leaves, the hungry never starve. Guide him, Kalahira, and he will be a companion to you as he was to me._

Shepard had never expected someone to pray for him. On his deathbed, no less. It was an honour, one seemingly too huge for him to deserve. But he did. So did Colburn.

_Colburn..._

Shepard tossed his datapad onto his bed in frustration. The trip to Noveria was a complete ruse. Ashley had volunteered, but he didn't pick her. Everyone knew it wasn't likely for Colburn to be there. Ashley being on site would just make her even more agitated. He had picked for Liara and Vega to follow him. When they landed, they had met strangely strong resistance from Ceberus. It seemed as if there really was something very precious at the facility. As they slowly made their way to the central chamber, Shepard had let his hopes rise. _Maybe he's really here. _But alas, the chamber was virtually empty, with the exception of Colburn's dogtags. The trio collapsed on the ground in defeat. _Were they ever going to find him?_

It was then that Samantha Traynor had contacted them, saying that an encrypted file had been received. They quickly rushed back to the ship, but as the encryption code was fairly complex, they couldn't do anything but wait.

Shepard had went to his cabin almost immediately. He tried to keep his mind clear with paperwork, but it wasn't an effective solution. He glanced at the clock. _Five hours already. _He sighed.

But the sound of EDI's voice pulled him out of his reverie. "Commander, Specialist Traynor had successfully decrypted the file. Orders?". _Yes!_

"Get everyone to the conference room asap!"

"Yes, Commander."

_Ashley_

_God... Where is he? _Ashley couldn't help but pace about the room. That was all she had been doing for the past few days. Traynor and Kaidan had come to keep an eye on her every so often. Garrus offered to accompany her to the shooting range. Even Liara had attempted to get her to do some sort of therapy session. But she pushed them all away.

All she wanted was to be left alone. Better still, she wanted to be on the mission to rescue Colburn. But Shepard had denied her that chance. She hurled quite some nasty vocabulary at her Commanding Officer, which was a big no no, but she couldn't care less at the time. Then again, Shepard was Mr Nice. She figured she'd be fine. For the time being at least.

"Lieutenant Commander Williams, Commander Shepard has called for a meeting at the conference room.". Ashley rushed out of the room before the AI finished her sentence.

0000000000000000

_Kaidan_

"I hope you enjoyed that little bit of entertainment. After all, it's the least we could give you after that wonderfully hilarious performance you presented us on Noveria. Did you seriously expect us to give you his location just like that? You're more dense than I thought! But however, because The Illusive Man has a heart of gold, we'll give him back to you, this time, for real. But of course, you have to act fast, or your beloved XO would just turn into a magnificent ice sculpture. I've heard that you have a penchant for chess, Miss Traynor. I hope you have a knack for puzzles as well. His life depends on you.". _And with that happy note, the video ended._

"What the hell is he thinking?". Kaidan couldn't hold it any longer. It was too much to handle. Not because of how Kai Leng was torturing his friend, but rather, why his friend was proactively instigating his captor to beat him up. "Is he nuts?". Still, he had to admit, he was impressed by Colburn's fire. No one would do that in the same circumstances.

"He's not crazy, Kaidan. He's helping us."

"And why do you say that?"

"Dr T'Soni is right. He's trying to help us get intel.".

"Traynor, you know what Colburn's thinking?"

"If I'm not wrong, Commander, he's trying to make Kai Leng angry. When people get angry, they spurt things out without thinking. He most probably guessed that they would use footage of him being beaten up to taunt us. He's trying to bait him to let the cat out of the bag, on camera."

_Okaaaay. That's smart._ "So... I guess we have to scrutinise every single piece of dialogue?"

"Yes."

"Well then, I'll take this for further analysis.". Liara downloaded the video onto her Omni-tool and exited the room. Kaidan turned his head to look at Ashley. The soldier was crumbling, bit by bit. He could see that. She was the same way when the SR1 was destroyed.

"I- I need some time alone.". Without another word, the woman also left.

"I uh... I've got calibrations to settle." The door opened for the third time. That left Kaidan, Shepard, Vega and Traynor.

"I need to work this out too.". Vega walked off as well. Down to us three.

Kaidan fought the urge to just walk away too. He wanted to find his friend. "So Traynor, what was the puzzle?"

"Just this.". She opened a silver metallic case. Inside it was an intricate model of the famed twentieth century cruise, _The Titanic,_ broken in half and sinking, surrounded by glaciers.

"What? They're keeping him at the North Atlantic Ocean? That's ridiculous!"

"Relax, Kaidan. Traynor, this look familiar to you?"

"No, not really... Unless...".

As if on cue, Liara barged back in again. "There's something I found!"

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_Traynor_

"Look!". Liara played the part of the footage close to the end._ "You're just plain lucky we need you for Alc-". _"See that? Kai Leng was starting to name something when Hutcherson cut him off."

"Well, Hutcherson's not an idiot. He must've saw through Colburn's trick and then but Kai Leng off from spilling the beans."

"Agreed. But what?"

"Didn't the word start with something like 'elk' ?"

"Alcatraz? Alkane? Alkene? Elcor?".

"I don't think so.". No one said anything afterwards.

Shepard must've sensed the tension, because he said: "Listen, everyone's tired. Go get some rest.". They all simply filed out of the conference room. Traynor brought the model with her and went up to the lounge. She sat on the couch and placed the model on the table before her.

_Titanic? Crashing? But it's from the twentieth century. The glaciers... Glaciers mean cold, right? It's the 22nd century now... And the greatest technological marvel is... The Normandy! Crashing... The SR1 got destroyed as well... It landed on an icy cold planet, didn't it? _

_Cold... SR1... Crash..._

_**Alchera.**_

**A/N: Yet another cliffhanger! Anyway, I really have to study now. The first paper's tomorrow. I think I deserve a review for doing this today despite my Chinese paper tomorrow right? I hope so.**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Oh shnap. I've met a new friend. It's called Writer's Block. :O Couldn't wrap my head around how to start the next chapter. I've already got what I want to write in future chapters, but I couldn't find a way to start it. Gah! Spent quite some time struggling, so I don't know if this sucks or not. Let me know. Ps: The previous chapter 17 was rubbish and non-canon. Sorry Tracy, but that little girl doesn't exist! Hah!**

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-Normandy, XO's quarters-

_Ashley_

"You're not supposed to move, God damn it!". Ashley pushed Colburn back to bed, gently.

"I'm fine! You're over-reacting."

"Over-reacting? You've got hypothermia, a really, really deep leg wound, bruises all over your face, got tasered, and went into a three-day coma. You're under-reacting."

"I _was_ suffering from hypothermia. The leg wound's already treated. The bruises are just superficial, I'm _not_ tasered _now_, and definitely _wide awake._"

_God, he really has a way with words. _"Too bad. Tell that to Chakwas."

"I'm alright now! See?". Colburn attempted to get off the bed and stand, but started to fall. She managed to grab him halfway.

"Oh yeah. I'm totally convinced.". Again, she pushed him back to bed.

"I just got up too hastily. I'll show you again-"

"No you're not! Now just lay down quietly or I'll tell Traynor to inform Lea about this!". It was a low blow, she had to admit. But the damn vanguard just wouldn't rest. Ashley was beginning to wonder why she cared so much about him.

"That's low!". But he complied anyway.

"Whatever works, right?"

"I should've known.". He gave an exaggerated sigh.

"You should feel happy. I'm applying what I've learnt, _from you._"

"You've spent too much time with Sam."

"What? I've only been gone for five minutes and you're talking behind my back?"

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_Traynor_

Traynor had already been standing at the door for ten minutes, watching the duo banter with each other. Those two had been too busy arguing to notice her. But she tried not to make herself known. The scene was too precious and lovely to destroy. But she had to get the big baby to bed, and obviously, the soldier wasn't doing so well at that. _Drowning,_ was more appropriate. A battle of words between a politician and not-a-word person wasn't even a battle at all.

"Look at what you've done to her!". Colburn pointed an agitated finger at the Lieutenant Commander. "She's threatening me now! You're a horrible influence."

"Hey, you're her teacher, not me."

"And since when did you two become BFFs?"

"32nd Febtober. How's that?"

"Horrible. Even Garrus' puns aren't as bad as yours."

"I'm gonna tell him that.". Ashley joined in the verbal assault.

"Oh yeah? What makes you think he'll take your word over mine?"

"My longstanding friendship with him. Plus, Samantha here's gonna help me out. Won't she?". Traynor could only nod her head in agreement. She was too busy musing at Colburn's expression.

"Am I being ambushed? For God's sake, you guys are supposed to look after me, not make me get hypertension. I'm a patient!"

"Well then, patients are supposed to rest!". Traynor gestured for Ashley to move aside, and forcefully pushed Colburn to lay down, then covered him with the blanket.

"I can't sleep with you guys watching me. Creepy much?"

"That's too bad for you. You can't be trusted.". Traynor stuck a tongue out at him.

"Specialist Traynor, I can take care of Captain Colburn, if you don't mind.". The sound of EDI's voice suddenly came to life.

"Splendid! Thank you, EDI."

"EDI, the last I remembered, I was still the XO of this ship."

"Commander Shepard has issued strict orders for you to recuperate. He has temporarily stripped you of your position."

"Great, just great.".

"Whoops. Too bad.". Colburn didn't reply, but merely turn his back to them. Both women took it as a cue to leave the room.

As they waited for the elevator, Ashley spoke up. "I swear, I couldn't have gotten him to bed if you weren't around."

"I second that. He's too smart for his own good sometimes.". The elevator arrived. They entered. "Wanna get some dinner together?"

"Sure, why not. I can use a cup of coffee after all that."

"So, when are you two getting together?".

"Wh-what?". The Lieutenant Commander was clearly caught offguard.

"I said-"

"No no, I heard you. But um, what made you think that way?".

The elevator reached the Crew Deck. They got out and started to make their way towards the Mess Hall. It was virtually empty. Most of the crew was either up on the CIC or snoring in the Crew Quarters. There was only Gabby, along with Donnelly, eating their supper and chatting quietly. The pair had worked for fifteen hours non-stop on the engines, but still looked energetic nonetheless. Traynor picked a quiet corner while Ashley went to grab some food from Gardner.

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_Ashley_

"You guys are lucky. I've got two plates of pasta left. Anything else?"

"Get me a cup of black coffee and a cup of tea."

"On it.". Ashley stole a quick glance at Traynor. The Briton's question had came out of nowhere. She had never expected such a question, much less so blunt and straightforward. She didn't know how to answer. She didn't even have a vague one. But there was no escaping. This was Samantha Traynor, the one who seems to know everything. She couldn't possibly hide anything. "There you go! Two pastas, black coffee and a cup of tea!"

"Thanks Rupert.". _Damn it, Gardner!_ _Why did you have to be so fast? _She picked up the trays and made her way to what was probably an endless conversation of awkwardness and embarrassment.

_It's gonna be a long meal._

**A/N: Hope this is alright for you guys. Just a note, next chapter's going to have some serious stuff. This is just a filler.**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Gah. This is horrible. One moment, I didn't have any ideas. The next, I've got too many. This whole thing feels like some sick joke. Oh well, at least I have them. Anyway, did any of you manage to play the new The Walking Dead game? It was awesome. Can't wait for episode two! Oh yes, we have a new shipmate onboard! Welcome, still1oading! That's eleven now!**

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-Normandy, conference room-

_Colburn_

"Shepard, you _have_ to let me join."

"No. I need you more on the ship. I need my XO commanding when I'm on the ground."

"_That's bullshit! _What about Palaven? We were _both_ there."

"And that was when you weren't _tortured_."

"Shepard, _I'm fine._"

"That's the end of the line, Colburn. You're not going, period.". And with that, Shepard stormed out of the conference room. Colburn slammed his hands on the table in frustration. He was getting sick and tired of everyone treating him like a baby ever since he got back. It had been two weeks since Alchera. _Why couldn't they just put it behind?_

He needed to do something before he wrecked anything. He headed down to the hanger to spar with Vega. It always did the trick. The elevator reached deck five. He got out and searched for his sparring partner. _That's strange. Where is he?_ "Cortez, you see Vega?"

"The Commander brought him along.". _God damn it. _"You need him for anything important?"

"Nah, I'm good.". _Perfect, just perfect._ Colburn couldn't take it any longer. _Well, guess it's drinking time. _He made his way to the lounge. He had expected it to be empty, just like most of the time. _Except it wasn't. _

Ashley was reading a book, and seemingly expecting somebody. She looked up at the sound of the door opening. _Great, I can't even drink in peace now._ "I'm sorry. Didn't know you were expecting someone. I'll just grab a bottle, and go up.". He hurriedly tried to reach the shelf, but Ashley was quick enough to block his path.

"Oh no you don't.". He tried to make his way around her, but she clearly wasn't giving in.

"Ash-"

"You're still recovering. No alcohol."

"So what? You're on alcohol duty now?"

"Cole, you know-"

_That's it._ He's had enough of all this bullshit. "No, I don't know! Okay? I. Don't. Freaking. Know. Why's everyone treating me like some guy who can't take care of himself? _Oh you want water? I'll get it for you. You need the datapad? I'll get it._ It's horrible! It's ridiculous! So, no! I don't know!"

"We're just-"

"Worried? Looking out for me? Have my interests at heart? Why not tell me something I _haven't head before _for a change.". Ashley didn't rebut. "So, if you can't, stop this nonsense and just let me get what I want in peace."

"If you want it, you gotta get through me."

"_Don't test my patience._". The soldier still didn't budge. _Two can play at this game._ "Fine.". Colburn turned around and started to head towards the door. The minibar in his quarters had only Batarian Ale left, but it was better than no alcohol at all. Unexpectedly, the exit locked tight just as he reached it. _EDI._

"Thanks, EDI."

"I'm the XO of this ship. You _don't_ want to cross me."

"Listen to yourself, Cole. You're just acting like a child now."

"Me? A child? Do you know what it's like? Not able to do anything at all? Like I'm a _fucking_ handicap? No, you don't. No one does.". He had always refrained himself from hurling not-so-nice words in front of others, but this was just pass his breaking point.

"So tell us. Samantha, me, _anybody._ If you don't tell us, we can't know!"

"And then what? You guys just psych me? I don't need anyone to understand me. All I want, is get some time alone, doing what I want, _in peace._ So if you're not opening this door,_ I will._". Colburn flared his biotics to make his intentions clear.

"EDI, open it."

"Acknowledged.". The console turned green again. Colburn stormed off without looking back.

He was too pissed to care.

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_Traynor_

-CIC-

"Sometimes, I don't know how or what's he thinking."

"Ashley, you have to give him time. He's just fed up with the way everyone's treating him. He doesn't like to be taken care of. He's used to taking care of himself if he wasn't busy looking out for others."

"But he just refuses to let anyone in."

"He's spent half of his life hiding, living in constant danger, where even a wrong word could get him killed. You don't just go spilling your heart out with that kind of life. Letting someone understand him makes him feel exposed, weak, predictable, you know?"

"I don't think I ever can. I would've crumbled if I were him."

"Precisely! That wall he built around himself had always meant protection. You can't just tear it down like that."

"Then what should I do?"

"Don't give up."

**A/N: Uh oh! Looks like cracks are coming up between Cole and Ash! :D [Insert evil laughter] I'm thinking of adding an ex-girlfriend in this. :p **


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Okay... So, I just read 'Remembering Torfan' by Dr Death DST, and I found something really wierd and disturbing. There was actually a 'Gunnery Chief Colburn' in his story, who was twenty and graduated from N7 and had good grades as well. Sound familiar? I've never seen a 'Colburn' anywhere except for this and iBayne's N7: Galaxy at war (I suggested the character to him). So, it felt kind of creepy. You don't see the name 'Colburn' often, do you? Dr Death DST isn't a reader of this, or at least he didn't subscribe or favourite it. Maybe it's just a coincidence, but... I don't know. It just feels uncomfortable. I know everything on this site isn't copyrighted or anything, but **_**if**_ **he really just plucked it out from here... It just feels awful having someone use your character without asking, you know? Gah.**

**Edit: If you find a chapter posted more than once, it's because I've spotted a mistake, then went to correct it.**

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-Normandy, en route to Citadel, Mess Hall-

_Colburn_

It had been a couple of days since the clash with Shepard and Ashley, and apparently, whoever was up there still had plans for him. Why? Well, because things just kept rolling downhill ever since.

"God, things just keep getting better and better, don't they?". It was awful. He couldn't even seem to have a meal in peace without any bad news coming up.

"Cole... Just relax. Everything's going to be fine."

"No, it's _not,_ Sam. The Citadel Council finding me for a 'chat' _won't_ be fine.". Colburn lightly slammed his mug on table in frustration. He didn't want the other crew members looking over. _Worse,_ they would go _Oh my, let me help you with that._

"Don't act like it's your first time dealing with them."

"Well, in the previous times, I've had _two_ Admirals and the Human ambassador -who _wasn't_ a traitor yet- by my side."

"Just take it as it comes, then. That had always been your way of dealing with life.". Traynor got up from her seat. "Listen, just get some rest. We're reaching in just twelve hours.". She had walked past him, when she suddenly turned and whispered to him. "Oh, check up on Ashley at the Observation Deck. She might need some help.". And with that, the Briton made her way up to the CIC.

_Ashley?_ He quickly made his way to the Observation Deck. Ashley wasn't around. Oh _wait, there she was, __on the ground._ "Ash? What's going on?". The woman merely pointed in the direction of a nearby table. He turned his head and found an empty bottle. _Uh oh, hangover alert. _He knelt down beside her and tried to speak as softly as possible. "God, what were you thinking. Come on, let's get you out of here.". Slowly and carefully, he picked her up in his arms, careful not to shake her too much, and started to walk towards the Lieutenant Commander's quarters. He had to walk slowly, so that she wouldn't make any noise or experience any more discomfort. _Oh dear God, please don't let anyone pass by_. It would be an awfully embarrassing moment.

Suddenly, Ashley started to speak, though rather incoherently. "Just... Wanted to take my mind off stuff.".

_Almost there... Keep going... _"Well, you're stupid. You could've read Tennyson or go shooting or went sparring or something."

"Hey, I'm just following you.".

_This lady's going to be the death of me. _"You start smart-assing me, soldier, I'll drop you right now.". _Fudge, the door's locked. _In his softest whisper, he asked: "EDI, a little help here?". He was hoping Joker wasn't there. If he did, it would be the end of the world, or galaxy. Maybe universe. There was no response. The door merely opened. _Thank God._ He tucked Ashley into bed, making sure to cover her up with the blanket. Hangovers were usually followed up by colds. He experienced them too often to forget.

Colburn went back to the Mess Hall, and managed to use the kitchen without Gardner fussing and complaining. He quickly found ginger, sugar and some boiling water and quickly got to work. Ginger tea was more effective than any painkiller when it came to hangovers. That was something he picked up from a Chinese classmate in college. He filled up a thermos mug with the life-saving concoction and brought it back to the room, where Ashley was soundly asleep. He set the mug down on the bedside table.

The soldier looked peaceful, in bliss, even. He wondered if that was how he looked during those times when he were unconscious. _Thrice now_, in less than three months. Colburn managed to find a notepad and a pen on her study. It was nice to have the feel of real paper and ink, something down-to-earth, rather than the virtual screens and datapads that were too common. He scribbled a few words down and left the room. "EDI, let me know when she's awake."

"Yes, Captain."

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_Ashley_

Ashley woke up to a wretched salad of giddy spells, a _massive_ headache, and a really, really parched throat. _Okay, never do that again, Williams_. She looked around. She was sleeping, warm and snug on her bed, but she was clearly drinking in the Observation Deck. Then, she noticed a thermos mug to her left, and a note beside it.

_There's ginger tea in it. Drink up. Don't drink too fast though. It might be sweet, but it gets real spicy as you go. Ps: Don't try to drink your way out of stuff. It's stupid. You're not a heavyweight like Shepard or Vega. Hope you've learnt your lesson._

_Okaaaay._ But Ashley was too thirsty too think over Mr Mysterious. She took the lid off the mug, and a comforting warm sweet scent rushed up into her nostrils. _Good god, this is heaven._ She took her first sip, then started to greedily gulp. _This is awesome. _Before she knew it, she was coughing and gagging. The pungent taste of the ginger hit the back of her throat. _Maybe not. _

She felt someone patting her back and heard a familiar voice through all her hacking. "_You never learn, do you?_". She felt someone bring a bottle of water to her lips and promptly drank. The fire in her throat extinguished, and her eyes stopped tearing up. She turned to find Colburn, _smiling._ Despite her hangover, she managed to punch him in the arm, hard. "Hey! I tucked you into bed, made you tea, just saved your life, and you punch me? I should've dropped you.". She punched him again, _harder._

"Just shut up."

"Okay, okay. I'll stop.". He held his hands up in a placating gesture.

"Smart move."

He took the mug over from her. "You okay?"

Ashley felt herself wanting to lie, but she didn't. "No."

Colburn inched closer. "What's wrong?"

"It's... Sarah. Her husband, Thomas. He died in the line of action.".

"On Earth?"

"Yeah."

"What about the rest of your family?"

"They managed to make it out. They're all on their way to the Citadel. Should arrive in two days."

"Is there anything I can help with?"

"Sarah wants to hold a memorial. It would mean a lot if you came."

"Just in time.". He paused for a bit. "We're reaching there in four hours. We're docking for a couple of days. I've got business with the Council-"

"Something wrong?". She couldn't help but interrupt. A meeting with the Council always meant trouble.

"Nah, we're good. As I was saying, Shepard and I need to see them, but it should be over before the memorial. I'll be there."

"You do know how long-winded those guys are, right?"

"Don't worry. I'll just place them in stasis, or whatever."

"You can never be serious, can you?"

"Well, I guess it depends on who I'm dealing with.". They both of them laughed lightly. "But I'll be there. Now, you go straight back to bed.". Colburn nodded for her to lay back down, and pulled the covers over her once again.

"Thanks, Cole."

"You bet."

**A/N: Now before you guys go all 'aww', something's about to happen soon. I don't just post such stuff for nothing. [Insert extremely evil laughter here] *Rubs hands together wickedly***


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Okay, the hiatus is officially starting after the next chapter. The bulk of the exams are coming up. Thankfully, the easy subjects are at the end of the exam period, so the hiatus wouldn't be very long. I just love torturing my characters. :D Oh, and please tolerate the zeros. I find them absolutely irritating too, but there aren't page-breakers on my phone app.**

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-Huerta Memorial Hospital-

_Shepard_

"Congratulations, Jacob."

"Thanks Shepard. Brynn says she wants to name the baby after you... You know... 'Shepard'."

"Oh. Okay... That's nice of her. I'm flattered.". _And freaked out._

"I'm planning to talk her out of that. No offense."

"None taken.". _Thank God._ Shepard checked his Omni-tool. _1.55 pm. Time to go_. "I'd love to stay and chat, Jacob, but I have a meeting with the Council. I should go."

"Take care, Commander.". Jacob gave Shepard one last nod of acknowledgment. Shepard jogged towards the elevator.

As the lift made its way towards the Citadel Embassies, Shepard couldn't help but let his thoughts wonder. He wouldn't be surprised if the Council wanted to meet him, _but Colburn as well? _His second-in-command had always did his best to stay out of the political limelight, only stepping in when absolutely necessary. _But for them to actually proactively request to see him... _Shepard could only hope it was something good. _Forget it Shepard, 'good' and 'Citadel Council' don't belong in the same airspace._

Shepard walked out of the elevator and headed towards the newly-reconstructed conference hall. The Ceberus invasion was almost three weeks ago, but the horror and fear written on the faces of the civilians were still fresh. That will have to wait for later. He scanned his thumb at the identity-recognition system installed at the entrance. "Identity confirmed. Welcome, Commander Shepard."

The gigantic doors opened, _only to reveal Colburn arguing with the Councillors._

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_Shepard_

"I think I've made myself pretty clear, Councillors. I appreciate the offer, but I don't want the position of Spectre."

_What? Spectre? Well, at least that's something different. _"With all due respect, Councillors, what is going on here?"

"Commander Shepard, it's good that you're here.". _Okaaay, Primarch Victus doesn't usually seek help, __from him._"The Citadel Council is offering Spectre status to Captain Colburn, but he refuses without giving us a proper reason."

"Well how about this: _The pay sucks._"

"Captain...". Shepard was on Colburn's side. He knew that the Captain wouldn't make a decision without careful consideration. But he couldn't show it openly, so he tried to put up a weak fight in front of the Council.

"Captain Colburn, that is not a reason. We'll increase your pay if that's what it takes.". The Asari Councillor was clearly not giving up.

"You're a smart man, Captain. _You surely know what's best for you._". _Ooh, the Salarian Dalatrass agrees too. _Considering the incident aboard the Normandy, plus Esheel's notorious reputation for being petty and narrow-minded, it was a little unexpected. _And Mordin's death. _

_Shake it off, Shepard!_ "You can't force me, Councillors. I've made up my mind. If you'll excuse me, I have a memorial to attend.". _That's more important than any of you,_ the ensuing silence seemed to convey, as Shepard's XO stormed out of the hall.

"Commander, please do help us enlighten your colleague.".

"Don't worry, I'll try my best.". _Yeah right._

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_Colburn_

Colburn suspected that the meeting had taken two decades off his lifespan. They just couldn't seem to understand the word 'no'. _Idiots._

_Forget it, you've got more important things. _Colburn made his way towards the little memorial wall. He was mildly surprised when he heard that the memorial wall was left intact and untouched during the coup. _Turns out Ceberus has some sense of respect after all. _

There were only a few others. A Salarian-Human couple, three Batarians, an Asari family... And then he noticed the Alliance soldier dressed in blue. He walked up to her, quietly, then placed both hands on her shoulders. "How you doing?", he whispered softly into her ear.

"I'm fine, but I don't know about Sarah.". She cocked her head towards the red-haired young lady standing close to the wall, arms folded and simply staring at one of the countless photos displayed. "She's not a career soldier, yet she's handling it all so well and calmly... It reminds me of dad. He'd always put a smile on his face, just for us even though his day was awful."

"You should take pride in it. She's a Williams too, remember? As far as I've heard, Williams women are as tough as nails."

"I know. I just- Everything's so hard for her. I don't know how she got through it. She'd always been the soft one. She wasn't the loud tom-boy like me, not the chatty one like Lynn, nor the happy-go-lucky one like Abbey. She's always been the sheltered one."

"We all have our storms to face. It's just that sometimes, these storms bring out what we thought we never had or were."

"You're right."

"You need to hang on, for your family and especially Sarah. She needs you more than ever.". Ashley turned to look at Colburn, her expression as if asking for support. He gave her an encouraging smile. "Go on, I'll see you back on the Normandy."

Ashley nodded, then walked up to her sister, and started talking.

_Yeah, she'll pull through._

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-Normandy, Shepard's cabin-

_Shepard_

"Colburn, you have to tell me the truth."

"I've told you, it's a trap. If I'm a Spectre, I'll be under the jurisdiction of the Citadel Council first, Alliance second. I don't trust those politicians. Besides..."

"What?"

"Remember how I told you about the first time I rejected them? I'd always suspected of Gregory Hutcherson of manipulating the Council. Now, we know for a fact that he's working for Ceberus. In turn, Ceberus is dabbling in Reaper tech. The most likely conclusion is that-"

_It dawned on him. _"Is that he indoctrinated them. And you're suspecting the same thing is happening?"

"Yes. But we don't have any proof, so we can't just say it out loud."

"Well that definitely cleared things up."

"Shepard, now do you get it?"

Colburn spilling everything out was unexpected, to say the least. Shepard had a hunch he was hiding an even darker truth. "There's something you're not telling me, isn't there?"

"I've told you everything I know. It's up to you to believe me or not.". Colburn stormed out of the cabin.

Shepard's intuition was still insistent that his XO was keeping something from him. But it would have to wait. Pressing on would do nothing good.

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Ashley

Ashley tapped her feet on the cold floor of the Observatory Deck. Colburn had been with Shepard for quite some time. It was unnerving. _What if they're arguing again? Chill, Williams. Get a grip. _"EDI told me you were looking for me?"

Ashley looked up at the sound of Colburn's voice. "Yeah. Just wanted to thank you. I don't know where my family's gonna put up if you didn't lend us your apartments."

"Heh. It's nothing. Besides, it's what they're meant for anyway."

"So uh, my mom actually wants to thank you, she wants to invite you over for a meal."

"Nah. It's fine. She's too kind."

"You clearly don't know what you're missing out on. She makes a mean barbecue. Oh, did I mention the awesome apple pie?"

"Okay, I'll take that back. I'll go. Besides, it's been a long time since I had a decent home-cooked meal. Gardner doesn't exactly have a flair for cooking."

"Samantha told me you're a pretty good chef."

"Why, thank you for the compliment. But cooking for yourself just doesn't have the same vibe to having someone cook _for_ you."

"Well, my dad married her for a reason you know. I don't think I've heard you mention about your mother before. What's she like?"

"Well, for starters, she isn't as awesome as yours."

"Tell me more."

"You don't really want to hear about her."

"Come on!". Ashley knew she was pushing it, but such an opportunity to learn about the Mystery Man was too valuable to pass up.

"She's dead! Happy now?". Colburn suddenly snapped. Ashley mentally punched herself. She went too far. "Sorry, I- Just...". His tone was apologetic now. _God, you're dense, Williams!_

"It's my fault.". The silence was embarrassing. _Do something. _"So, how about this Thursday?"

"Sounds good. I've got paperwork to do. I'll see you at breakfast tomorrow.". And with that, Mr Mystery left the room.

_Good job, Williams. _

She just hoped she wouldn't get carried away again, especially on Thursday.

**A/N: Well, I'm typing out the next chapter right now. See you guys in a couple of hours. And do review. There was only one last chapter. A little disappointing. Keep em coming guys, they're motivation.**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Whoopee! The kicker's here! Yay! (I managed to keep my promise. I think I deserve something, no?)**

**Edit: I just updated chapter one. Go read it. _Really important._**

-Citadel, Spectre Terminal-

_Shepard_

"It's there? You sure?"

"Yes. I'm sure. It's best that we leave straight away. We don't know what they're up to."

"Agreed. This might be our only chance. We leave tomorrow. I'll send someone to pick you up."

"Thank you, Shepard."

"See you later, Miranda."

-Apollo's Cafe-

_Colburn_

Colburn couldn't help but smile at the view in front of him. Seeing everyone get some fresh air out of the Normandy, just relaxing. It was refreshing. He was glad that Shepard had called for a social gathering, though he was a little bummed that Sam wasn't around. She'd went to help her parents settle in. They'd just arrived at the Citadel. _At least they're safe._

"Okay, how about this one: What do you call a Turian getting killed by a freakish bird-like monster that's ugly as hell?"

"Friendly fire. Come on, Joker. Don't you have something better?".

Garrus and Joker were trying to shoot racist jokes at each other, which was actually kind of funny, _in a sick way. _Cortez and Vega were reminiscing about the old days. On the other hand, Liara and Kaidan were just chatting happily, in their own little bubble, oblivious to their surroundings. Colburn understood how rare it was to have Liara completely let her hair **(tentacles/fringe or whatever. Just a metaphor.) **down without worrying over all the Shadow Broker business. Meanwhile, Donnelly and Gabby were nowhere to be seen. Someone told him they went to watch _Blasto: The Jellyfish Stings._

And then, things came back to him and Ashley. He was listening to her about her childhood days, her dad, sisters, everything about the life a blissfully ordinary kid would have. _Experiences that he never had._

"You okay?". Ashley waved her hand in front of his eyes. He hadn't realised that he was so deep in thought.

"Yeah. Sorry about that."

"I wasn't lying when I said about sending you for a check-up if you started blanking out on me."

"Yes ma'am.". He gave her a playful grin and a mock salute, just for good measure.

"Cole!". Everyone at the table turned around at the sound of Shepard's voice. Shepard gestured for him to come over.

"Be right back.". Colburn jogged over to the Commander. "Need me for anything?"

"I need you to pick up someone for me. She's arriving at the Citadel soon. Escort her to the Normandy. Make arrangements for lodgings."

"Who?"

"Operative Lawson.". Colburn merely gave a nod in response. "You're not asking me why?"

"If there's anyone's judgement I trust, it's yours."

"Good to know."

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_Ashley_

Ashley couldn't help but glance over to Colburn and Shepard every so often. Both men had vastly different ways and methods of dealing with situations, which frequently resulted in friction and problems. _What could they be talking about? _Not long after, she saw Colburn jog off while Shepard came over towards their table. His expression wasn't what someone would call _sunny._

"Listen up, people!". All chatter stopped and everyone snapped to attention at the voice of their Commanding Officer. _Please don't tell me... _"I'm sorry to say that we have to cut our shore leave short. We have an urgent mission.". _Shmuck._ The crew immediately started to stand and head back towards the frigate, but Shepard quickly put his hands up, gesturing for them to return to their seats. "But, don't worry. We leave tomorrow. You guys still have the day to yourselves. The ship needs refueling anyway. Bottom line is, you guys just need to return to the ship by 7.15 pm. Until then, you can do whatever you want, alright?"

"Hoorah! Come on, Cortez. Let's get to Purgatory. We ain't got much time left to waste.". And with that, Vega and Cortez left the table.

"Well, guess we should get going too. EDI and I are going to watch _Fleet and Flotilla._"

"Can I join you guys?"

Joker shrugged his shoulders. "Why not?". The unusual group of Turian, Human, and robot left as well.

"Liara and I are staying for lunch. What about you, Commander?"

"Sounds lovely.". Shepard occupied the seat Colburn had previously sat. "Cole's gone to do something for me. He won't be joining. What about you, Ash?"

"Count me in. But I've got a call to make first.". Ashley got up and walked to a quiet corner. She punched in a few numbers on her Omni-tool. _Come on..._ An image flickered to life on the black screen.

"Ashley?"

"Hey mom. I think we need to take a rain check on that dinner."

**A/N: That's all I've managed to type out in my free time. I'd wanted to put the climactic part in this chapter, but I figured it would take the suspense away. Just one more week, guys. One more week of waiting and hellish torture, _then_ we'll be back to normal.**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Here's chapter 22. Whoopee! :D**

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-Normandy-

_Ashley_

"Wait, we're _storming Sanctuary?_". Ashley couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Yes. It appears that Sanctuary is more than it looks. We suspect that Ceberus has something to do with whatever's going on down there."

Ashley could only shake her head in strong disapproval. "Hold on a sec. Sanctuary's all over the ads as 'the galaxy's safest place'. The only thing we're gonna find there are thousands of refugees. Besides, I was stationed on Horizon before, and the only Ceberus presence was _Shepard._". She immediately regretted what just came out of her mouth. She shot Shepard an apologetic look, but the blonde merely nodded in understanding. Sometimes, Ashley thought that she would've been tossed out of the airlock a million times if Shepard wasn't Mr Nice. She just couldn't seem to think before shooting her mouth off.

"I've detected anomalies in the signals coming from the planet. Something is _definitely_ going on."

"She's right. If it's a false alarm, we'll just take it as an excursion. If Ceberus _is_ there... Well... I'd say we don't take any chances.". Ashley turned to Colburn. She didn't expect him to agree with Lawson, considering her Ceberus past and all.

"Alright, listen up!". Shepard piped up. "The journey to Sanctuary takes thirteen hours, so I suggest you guys get some rest, train up, check your equipment, and get prepared."

"Have a little faith, Loco."

"Especially _you,_ James. All that drinking at Purgatory's starting to make you soft around the edges. I want you getting back to those crunches and pull-ups.". A small snicker made its way throughout the War Room. Ashley saw Vega blush. "Sanctuary's a big place. It's got three entrances shown on the map. I'll lead the first squad. Kaidan, Garrus, you two are with me. Cole, you're with Liara. Miranda will join you. Ashley, you're in charge of the third. Bring along Vega and EDI.".

An unanimous "Aye aye" resonated throughout the War Room in response. Their CO dismissed the crew, and they all simply filed out and returned to their respective duties. They had to wait for the elevator to make three trips, since there were far too many of them. Coincidentally, there was only her and Colburn left waiting for the fourth ride.

There was an awkward silence. Ashley didn't know what to say. The current atmosphere was too tense, a far cry from the ambience and mood at Apollo's just hours before. To her surprise, Colburn broke the silence first. "So uh, about that dinner...". His words trailed off.

"Don't worry about it. I've told mom about it. She understands. She's used to it I guess. My dad couldn't make it home for dinner most of the time.". Colburn merely gave a nod in response. Ashley could see that something was bothering him. "What are you thinking about?"

"Nah, you know, Horizon. Sam's from there. Her parents just made it to the Citadel today. To think that we're heading there in less than twenty four hours... I don't wanna know what would've happened if they were late by thirteen hours."

Ashley sensed that there was something else, something much bigger on his mind, but she didn't push. The incident at the Observation Deck was still fresh in her mind. "Say, speaking about dinner, maybe we can't make it to my mom's, but what about a substitution at the Mess Hall? I haven't tried your cooking yet."

Colburn gave a laugh. "Fair enough. Wouldn't want to stand a lady up, especially a hungry one.". Ashley gave him a playful punch. As if on cue, the elevator arrived. "Come on. Let's show Gardner _real cooking_."

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-Towards Sanctuary, aboard the shuttle-

_Colburn_

Colburn eyed the dark-haired woman sitting opposite him. There was something about the genetically-perfect beauty that intrigued him. Say, for instance, _her real motives for instigating Shepard to send his full squad to the facility._ "So...". Colburn deliberately injected a tinge of curiosity into his voice. "You're absolutely sure Ceberus is here?"

"Absolutely.". Her reply was curt and swift.

"What are you hoping to gain from this?". His tone was light, but the underlying accusation was as bright as day.

The ex-Ceberus operative merely smirked. "Same thing as you; _answers._"

"She knows, Colburn. I've told her.". Colburn immediately turned his head towards Liara. The Asari's expression was unusually serene.

"What?". _Is she kidding me?_

"Right now, she's your only hope."

"Dr T'Soni is correct. I know Ceberus' operations best."

_I hope so._

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_Shepard_

Miranda _was__right._ Sanctuary was more than it seemed. But it was still a little hard to swallow, and no less mind-boggling. The minute they landed, Ceberus shuttles were evacuating like crazy. And then, harvester swooped over their heads. Ceberus resistance at the main entrance was relatively weak, to say the least.

Once they entered the facility, things became more mysterious. Both Ceberus troopers and Reaper corpses littered the ground. Civilian shuttles were either abandoned, or burning in flames. Journal entries on the computer logs of the administrative staff were even wierder. Talks about having excess test subjects... How long the administrative procedure would take... The selection process... They sounded eerily similar to an experiment, _except on a whole larger scale._ Shepard had contemplated that Ceberus were using the refugees as Reaper tech test subjects, but he hoped he was wrong.

"Shepard, come in.". _It was Ashley._

"What's wrong?"

"We're seeing Reaper tech all over the place. Datapads on effective indoctrination methods... _God, this is a lab. _Ceberus was advertising this place as a refugee area to lure those people here, then used them as guinea pigs..."

"And then they couldn't spread the word, because Ceberus jammed the signals...", Colburn interjected.

Vega's loud voice suddenly boomed over the comm. "Those fuckers!"

"Alright people. Now we know what this place really is. Let's dig deeper. Call out if there's anything new."

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_Shepard_

The squads have been on ground for nearly three hours now. They'd explored countless labs, rooms and hallways. There were the occasional leftover Reaper forces from the assault on the facility, but other than that were just logs after logs of improving indoctrination techniques by the Ceberus scientists. "Guess this is called poetic justice, huh?". Shepard turned at the sound of Kaidan's voice.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Ceberus attacked the Citadel, and now the Reapers bit them in the ass as well."

"_But why?_". Colburn was evidently perplexed.

"That's what we're finding out, Captain.". But deep down, Shepard himself was wondering about the same thing.

"Shepard, this is Miranda. I found something.". Before he could ask _what,_ she continued. "It's Oriana. _She's here._"

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_Colburn_

_How could she lie so smoothly?_ "Shepard, I have to save her."

Shepard's concerned voice came through from his earpiece. "Do you have her coordinates?"

"I've got it! Sending them to your Nav-point now.". Colburn watched Lawson disconnect. "Let's go."

"You knew your sister was here from the start, didn't you?"

Lawson stopped in her tracks. "Yes."

"Why lie?"

"I could ask you the same question. Why are you hiding it from everyone?"

"I'm not in the mood for games, Lawson."

"Don't worry. You'll get your solution. I just want to rescue my sister in exchange. Surely you know that you're not at a disadvantage here."

"She will keep her word, Colburn. The answers will be found today."

"I hope so."

"Squad two! Heads up! You've got Kai Leng on your tail.". Ashley's voice crackled to life.

Instantly, the three of them stood back-to-back, scanning their surroundings, waiting in anticipation for the flash of a sword, or the familiar blue glow of biotics. A sudden shockwave came towards them, and they rolled apart in different directions, narrowly avoiding that wave of destruction. Colburn glanced over to the general direction of the source.

_And there, standing in front of him, was that familiar assassin._

"Go get to Shepard! We'll take care of him!". Lawson immediately ran for the exit. The assassin started to give chase, but was blocked by Liara and Colburn._ Two on one. _

_Let's see if you're so lucky._

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_Ashley_

Gunfire and the sound of biotics being activated buzzed through the comm. Ashley gestured for her squad to pick up the pace. "Come on, we've got to help them out!". They had barely made fifty metres when an army of Marauders marched in through the various entrances of the chamber, along with _four_ Brutes.

"Miss Williams.". Ashley's head snapped towards the direction of that horribly smooth voice. _Hutcherson._

"Get out of the way."

"I'm afraid I can't do that. Don't let them get out of here alive!". At his words, the Reaper troops opened fire. Ashley and her squad took cover, narrowly missing the onslaught of bullets. Ashley decided that she was going to capture that bastard alive. She still felt guilty for trusting him once, instead of Colburn. And she was planning to make up for it.

_Time to make things right._

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_Shepard_

"I can be reasonable. Let her go, and I'll let you walk away.". Shepard eyed Henry Lawson from behind his visor. He was doing his best to negotiate. He hoped the power-hungry man would be desperate enough to bite the bait.

Henry Lawson seemed to hesitate for a little while. Slowly, he released his grip on Oriana. "Fine. I've let her go. You promised to let me go. Deal?"

"No deal!". And with that, Miranda let out a biotic throw, and Henry Lawson went crashing through the glass window.

"Miranda!". The younger Lawson hugged her sister tightly.

"Thank God you're alright, Ori!". The heartwarming scene was shattered by a loud explosion. _It came from the comm._

_Damn it,_ he forgot Colburn and Liara were still dealing with Kai Leng. Miranda seemed to think of the same thing as well. They gave each other a nod of understanding. "Garrus, make sure the message gets out loud and clear! Kaidan, stay with him and Oriana. Tie up the loose ends, then get back to the Normandy! Ashley, same goes for your squad!"

Miranda rushed out, and Shepard turned to follow her lead.

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_Colburn_

Kai Leng was a tough son of a bitch. The asshole cloaked himself, only randomly coming out to launch surprise attacks. Of course, two biotics instead of one evened up the odds, but it also turned the whole thing into a stalemate.

"I was right, you know. You're a coward. A damn, fucking coward. Who cloaks himself like a girl during a fight? Oh right, people without balls.". Colburn was hoping that anger would get the better of the assassin, allowing him and Liara to take advantage. But apparently, Kai Leng had gotten smarter. He didn't even utter a sound.

Colburn withheld a curse. The game of hide-and-seek were tiring out the both of them. The bastard had undergone mechanical augmentations, so he would most probably have a higher stamina. They were different. If they showed any signs of exhaustion, and slowed down their reflexes, it would be game over. He wished Vakarian or EDI was around. _Hell, even Lawson would do. _They needed a tech expert to overload Kai Leng's shields. That was the only reason why the assassin was still breathing. Neither him nor Liara were able to take out his shields, and essentially, his cloak. If they could, the idiot would've been as toast as varren bacon.

Out of a blue, there was a sudden spark in the air, and Kai Leng re-materialised. "Miss us?". Colburn dared himself to turn to the sound of Shepard's voice. The blonde Commander was smiling, Omni-tool equipped. _Overload._

"About damn time.". Colburn ducked just in time, narrowly avoiding the strike from Kai Leng's sword. He activated his Omni-blade and stabbed in Kai Leng's direction. The assassin dodged. _God, he's nimble._ The four of them opened fire, but Kai Leng was able to shield himself with a biotic barrier. _Idiot._ Colburn could see through the translucent barrier that Kai Leng was pressing one ear with his finger. _Comm... The Illusive Man. _Colburn could roughly make out what he was saying through lip-reading. _Understood. I will withdraw. _The assassin then looked towards the roof, as if waiting for something to drop. Colburn realised what was happening, and hurriedly activated a biotic barrier around him and his squadmates. True enough, there was the sound of cannon fire a few seconds later. He could feel the force of the blast, but the barrier absorbed every bit of it. They were safe.

As the dust cloud settled, Colburn managed to see Kai Leng made his way towards the Hammer-head. _You're not running this time. _He biotic-charged, but as the barrier had used up most of his energy, he only reached halfway. _Damn it. _He sprinted, determined not to let him get away. Just as he was about to reach, he saw Kai Leng take out a remote and press a button. Realisation dawned on him, but it was too late.

_The voices were back. Whispers, screams, mutterings._ His head was in chaos. _No, not now! So close! Make it stop! No! _His head felt like an erupting volcano, on the verge of explosion.

_He managed to see Shepard rush towards him before the world faded to black._

**A/N: Hey! This was incredibly long. Damn. Took me quite some time. Leave a review, okay? I told you things were getting darker. :p**

**Ps: Go read Belief by Try Me Hot. One of the best writers I've seen on this site, and one of the few ones that accurately portray the characters correctly and believably**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Hello? Is anyone there? It's like as if everyone on FF disappeared. What's going on? O.o**

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-Normandy, War Room-

_Shepard_

Shepard's mind was a mess, to begin with. First, his second-in-command suddenly dropped to the ground, clutching his head and screaming for the voices to stop. Second, Kai Leng got away. Third, Ashley had managed to secure a rather peculiar prisoner-of-war. Fourth, Miranda and Liara seemed to know something that the rest of them didn't. He hadn't been expecting his previous XO and the Shadow Broker to be contacting each other behind his back.

After hauling Colburn back aboard, they immediately rushed him to the medbay. Liara had specifically ordered Chakwas to sedate him for at least twenty four hours, and even instructed Vega and Garrus -the strongest of the squad- to watch over him, as if he were a highly dangerous convict. No one else was allowed in the medbay as well. Miranda, on the other hand, had convened for a meeting at the War Room. Their special guest meanwhile, was being watched by three of the ship's crewmen at the hangar deck. They weren't taking any chances with _that guy._

One by one, everyone filed in the room with their battle armour. No one had bothered to change. "I believe everyone is curious about Colburn. As a heads up notice, no one is allowed near the medbay. I've placed him under sedation for twenty four hours. No one is to see him."

"Why?". Ashley's tone was harsh, but understandable.

"Because he's indoctrinated.". This caused a muttering throughout the room.

"What are you talking about, Lawson?"

"The truth. Dr T'Soni, if you would."

"It all happened roughly five days after the rescue. Colburn went to see me. He asked me for help."

"On what?"

"He told me of the visions, voices, whispers he had occasionally, and the dreams and nightmares. At first, I thought it was just the trauma of the whole encounter. But then, he mentioned of not being able to recall what happened on Alchera. Only bits and pieces, _shards._ He told me to meld my mind with his."

"What did you see?". Shepard felt himself wanting to know, yet dreading what Liara might say.

"He was... Subjected to various indoctrination methods. Radiation, brain waves, _everything._ He was lucky to remain sane. _Very lucky._". _And even luckier to realise something was wrong. _"There's one more thing. I realised that the memories were suppressed by force, not out of shock or trauma. It's as if his subconsciousness was instructed to block that particular memory."

"Damn it! I should've known! It was too good to be true! He wouldn't have just returned him back to us.". Shepard slammed his hands on the console.

"It's not your fault, Shepard. No one would've thought that The Illusive Man would plant a sleeper agent by your side. Soon after, Dr T'Soni contacted me, asking for assistance. I managed to trace a signal to Horizon. You guys know the rest.". And with that happy note, they let the harsh truth sink in.

"What about that device I saw Kai Leng use?"

"We think that it is some kind of remote, something like an emergency activation switch. That is why I had Colburn placed under surveillance. Until we know what it does, he is an unknown threat."

"At least we've got Hutcherson now. We can just beat the crap outta him and get the info."

"I don't think it works that way, Kaidan. But we've got to take our chances anyway.". Shepard looked at the faces of his squad. They were all exhausted, dirt and grime evident on their faces. "Alright, go rest. You've all done more than enough today. Have a good sleep. We need you now more than ever. Dismissed.".

One by one, they exited the War Room. Ashley, however, simply stood still, brown eyes staring at the holographic image of the Crucible. "Commander,", she spoke. "I want to interrogate Hutcherson."

"Thought you'd never ask. You up for it now?"

"Hell yes."

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_Ashley_

_Damn elevator. _Ashley knew the elevator wasn't slow, but it just seemed like eternity for it to reach the hangar deck. She was planning to do exactly what Kaidan had suggested; punch the hell out of the bastard, get the solution, then save Colburn. _Finally._ The elevator door opened up. Shepard gestured for everyone else to leave. In less than a minute, there were only three of them left in the whole, empty hangar. Ashley was about to punch Hutcherson in the face, but she was stopped by Shepard even before she raised her fist.

"Ah, Commander Shepard. I finally get to see you in-". Shepard released his grip on her, and she took it as a prompt to hit him right across the face. "-person...". Hutcherson was obviously not expecting the strength of her punch. It knocked a teeth out. He spat a disgusting mixture of blood, saliva and a tooth onto the pristine floor.

"Skip the niceties, Hutcherson. Tell us what we want, and maybe we'll let you live long enough to reach the Citadel."

"Miss Williams, volatile as always. I wonder why my son fell for you. Such a contrast to his calm nature. I can see where his newfound rashness came from.". She punched him right on the nose. She couldn't help but smile when she heard that sickening crack. Blood started to flow out.

"You might want to start talking, Hutcherson. I can't keep my friend here from restraining herself much longer."

"Give me a reason."

"I'm a Spectre. I don't need one."

"You might be above the law, Shepard. But the law is only effective when everyone agrees to be bound by it. Besides, _don't you dare_ compare me to a lowlife like Elias Kelham. It may have worked on him, but not me."

"How about not getting yourself thrown out of the airlock? That compelling enough, asshole?"

"Do that and you lose your only hope of ever getting back your XO.". A smug grin appeared on the asshole's face. He had the upper hand. It was obvious. They had no choice but to listen to him.

"What do you want?". Ashley's head snapped towards her CO. _What? How could he?_

"Bring me back to the Citadel. _Nominate me as the next Human Councillor._"

"_What?_ Shepard, you can't do that!". That idiot must've had a mole in the Alliance. In the aftermath of the coup, the Alliance had only admitted to the betrayal of Udina. They had never mentioned the presence of Hutcherson. The negative impression of Humanity caused by Udina was devastating enough. Since he wasn't known amongst the inter-galactic political scene, the Council had also not known about his existence. With the war on Earth as well as the Crucible in construction, both Anderson and Hackett were unavailable. No one would be able to stop him.

"I'm just a Spectre, not the damn President of the galaxy."

"Don't bother playing games with me, Shepard. You saved the Destiny Ascension at the cost of thousands of humans. You saved them from the Ceberus invasion. You're a god damn Spectre. The Council will listen to you.". Shepard remained silent. "Do that, and you'll have your XO back, good as new."

"How can I be sure you'd keep your word?"

"I make fair deals, Commander. You do your part, and I'll fulfill mine."

"Fine. I'll hold you to that.". Ashley started to protest, but Shepard shot her a look that said; _not now._

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_Shepard_

Once the elevator doors shut, Ashley started shouting. "What on Earth are you thinking, Shepard? He can't be trusted!"

"Ash, we don't have a choice. He's our only shot at this. If we refuse him, we won't even get that chance."

"Colburn wouldn't want you to do that."

"Too bad for him. He doesn't have a say in this."

_Ping._ The elevator reached the crew deck. "Shepard-"

"Ash, it's okay. I have a solution. Everything's going to be fine. Go get some rest. Colburn wouldn't want to see you like that. That's an order, LC."

"Aye aye, Skipper.". Thankfully, Ashley went back to her room without another word.

Shepard made his way to outside the medbay. Garrus and James were replaced by two guards from the crew. He watched Colburn, just laying on the thin mattress, unconscious. "He was afraid, you know.". Shepard turned to the left to find Liara standing beside him.

"Of what?"

"Becoming like Saren."

"I knew there was something much bigger when he rejected the position."

"He couldn't trust himself to do the right thing. After knowing his father's mistakes, the way the Citadel Council and the Alliance reacted to the missing colonies, how they incarcerated you when you peacefully surrendered the SR2 to them, and Kai Leng... Almost everyone and everything he trusted and believed in were disappointing. The foolish blunders and stupid mistakes, how those around him fell influenced to the fancy words of the enemy, he just didn't have the confidence that he would make the right judgement call anymore."

"And yet he always did. Better than all of us anyway. He might very well be the first person to realise that he's indoctrinated."

"Yes. Ironic, isn't it? He's done far better than most, yet he thinks he's the worst.". Shepard only nodded in agreement. "What about you, Shepard. You've got an even heavier load. What do you really feel?"

"Disappointed. The Reapers are out there, spread throughout the entire galaxy, yet we have the Asari who refuse to help, businessmen who take the opportunity to increase their prices, the Quarian fleet only caring about taking back Rannoch... It's just... Ridiculous, you know?"

"I won't say I understand, because I can't. This unfortunate burden belongs to you and you only, I'm afraid. But take heart, you have us. We may not be able to help much, but we can catch you when you fall."

"I just hope the gamble's worth it. Guess we'll just have to pray that Hutcherson's going to keep his word."

"It's a leap of faith, Shepard. But it's a leap of faith we _have_ to take. I trust your judgement. We all do. And I'm sure Colburn does too."

"Thanks Liara."

"My pleasure."

**A/N: Oh my freaking God! I actually typed this out _twice,_ because I didn't save the first time, and _everything was gone. _I nearly killed myself. I think I deserve a medal for that. Or maybe just a review. Seriously, is everyone dead? People don't seem to reply to me on FF. **


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Aloha guys! First up, we have our twelfth member onboard, DarkReaver724! Welcome to the ship, mate! :D Second, yes. Lol. Kai Leng is Adam Jensen's ME counterpart, at least that's how I feel. With the visor and black hair and mechanical augmentations, it's hard to not see the similarities.**

**Ps: I just checked, and this story actually has 1,709 visitors! And it's just one month and a day old! I FEEL SO HAPPY!**

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-Conference Room-

_Shepard_

"_What?_ No. We're not leaving him on just some surgery table with Hutcherson!"

"Shepard, it's the only way. The Normandy's medbay is only suitable for emergency treatment. The de-indoctrination process requires a long time. We can't just open up his brain and take out the chip. It doesn't work like that."

"Miranda-"

"I'll watch over the entire process. He won't get a chance to do anything else. I promise."

"There must be some other way."

"The only other way, is to just give up on your friend. It's your choice."

"More like Hobson's.", Shepard scoffed. "Fine. I'll do it."

"I'll get everything ready then.". Miranda removed her hands from the table and prepared to exit. She had barely made five steps before she felt Shepard grip her arm.

"We can't lose him..."

"Trust me."

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_Ashley_

"I would understand if you want to take a period of long shore leave to stay by him."

"It's fine Commander. I'm staying on the Normandy."

"Are you sure?"

"If there's anything I've learnt, it's always try to do something constructive. That's what he taught me. It wouldn't do any good if I just waited at the side. I can't help. Rather than just staring into thin air, why not serve aboard?"

"Well then, you better get ready. We're going to Lesuss, a request by an insider from Asari High Command."

"Aye aye."

**A/N: This is a trailer for the next chapter I guess? It's only coming a few days later though. I have exams again tomorrow.**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Hello guys! What's up? Finally, my exams are over, though not exactly on a happy note. I screwed up my Pure Geography, _real bad_. Anyway, let's move on to better stuff. We have crew number 13 and 14! Welcome iBayne and S. Laurence! Can you believe it? Just one more and we'll have five times than that of Dear Diary! If you haven't checked out iBayne's N7: Galaxy At War, which you most probably already have, go check it out (Colburn's in the first few chapters, as well as the latest one. Note, this Colburn isn't the same guy. It's actually based after me, which means it's a stupid Colburn.). I have to say, if I'm supposed to keep track of so many characters, I would've jumped down a building. Lol. Anyway, hope you guys like the plot twists. But I kinda worry I'm overdoing it. Tell me alright? I don't want this to become some cheesy cliche trash.**

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-Normandy, hangar deck-

_Kaidan_

"Thanks, amigo. Couldn't have done it without your help."

"No problem. Just don't try to customise your Omni-blade by yourself again. You're not exactly what I'd call a tech person."

"After all the sparks and fires and everything, I'm not planning to re-enact. Just feeling kinda lucky Loco's on Lesuss with Ash and Liara."

"Good for you. You'd better clean that up before he gets back."

"Good point.". Kaidan was about to return back to his office when his stomach rumbled. _Damn._ "Better get some grub. I've seen how much you biotics eat.". _Wow, if Vega can hear it, it must be really loud. _

"Yeah yeah.". Kaidan made a face at Vega. "Good luck with all that cleaning. Those marks look awful. You'll need a lot of luck.". He entered the elevator and pressed the button for deck three. His tummy rumbled again, this time even louder. _Oops._ Kaidan had spent the past few hours helping Vega fix his Omni-tool, after he nearly set the ship on fire.

As soon as the elevator doors opened, he rushed out and made a beeline for Gardner. "Rupert! What've you got? I'm starving!"

"Just in time. I've just made a batch of calamari gumbo. Want some?".

Kaidan peered behind Gardner, and saw him scoop up a ladle of some stew-like green coloured goo. _Holy Jesus, what the hell is that?_ "Here you go!".

Gardner held out a plate full of the disgusting liquid and stretched his hand out towards the ravenous biotic. Kaidan just froze, torn between filling his tummy at the expense of his tastebuds or dying of starvation in dignity. The random pieces of _god-knows-what_ floating innocently in the sea of goo didn't help. His tummy rumbled for the third time, louder than ever. _Ugh, whatever. _He took the plate, thanked the cook, and sat down at the nearby table.

_Relax, it's just calamari. _He speared one of the unknown solids with his fork and brought it in front of him. _Maybe not._ _It looks more like something from Tuchanka's sewage system. _He shut his eyes tight. _Come on, Alenko. _He desperately tried to move his hand towards his mouth, but it seemed to have a mind of its own, just refusing to put the damn possibly-extremely-toxic piece of radioactive-substance inside. Things remained that way for a long time. He figured he looked like some idiot with his mouth wide open who couldn't seem to control his limbs, fork in hand, hovering in front of his face.

Just as he was about to give up, he felt a strong hand slam his back and he jerked forward, mouth open and sending the content of the fork right into his mouth. Immediately, he could feel his eyes water. The stuff was corroding his tongue like a piece of magnesium in acid. _Holy shit! _He spat it out immediately. He ran towards the sink and ran his tongue under the life-saving steam of water. _Oh God, this is salvation._ Satisfied that his mouth was rid of the biohazardous matter, he turned off the tap and spun round to find Garrus, mandibles twitching in amusement.

"Garrus!"

"Thought you had a little problem, so I decided to help you out."

"You're just jealous that you don't really have anything on this ship to eat other than those nutrient packs."

"Well considering that Gardner's your chef, I feel kinda lucky.". The Turian laughed out loudly, the flanging even more obvious than ever. _Idiot._

The three-fingered bully was about to rub it in, when Liara came storming right into her room. _They're back?_ He arched an eyebrow towards Garrus, but his friend merely gave him a shrug of the shoulders. Then he mouthed something. _Ask Ash, I'll go to Shepard._

Kaidan nodded in reply.

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-Comm Room-

_Shepard_

Shepard leaned against the wall and ran his fingers through his blonde hair. The mission did not go as expected. _No wonder the Asari Councillor had snuck them the intel. _Seeing Samara was nice. _The circumstances that accompanied were not. _Shepard let out a sigh. The Reapers were seemingly unstoppable. They don't need supplies, they make their troops based off their enemies', basically attacking their strongholds mean you're attacking your own home... The whole thing just felt like a lost cause.

A knock roused him from his depressing thoughts. "Shepard, you okay?". Shepard instinctively recognised the deep throaty voice, with that unique flanging. _Garrus._

He rubbed his eyes with his hands and stood straight. "Yeah. What's up?"

"Just wondering what happened. Liara was pissed."

"We went to this Ardat-Yakshi monastery. Those commandoes were all wiped out."

Garrus' jaw dropped, or would've, if he was human. "Damn."

"Yeah. Turns out the Ardat-Yakshi were the victims instead. Reapers attacked the place. They turned them into Reapers too. Banshees."

"And I thought the Husks and Brutes and Marauders were bad enough. No wonder she was pissed. Probably reminded her of her mother. Benezia was indoctrinated by the Reapers too, remember?"

"Yeah. Guess so.". Shepard couldn't think of anything else. Liara was a confidant. It worried him to see her like that. "How is she?"

"Horrible. But don't worry. Kaidan's on it."

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_Liara_

Liara's mind was still struggling to process the information on Lesuss, which was ironic, with her Shadow Broker business and all. Her emotions threatened to break loose when she saw what the Reapers had done at the monastery. Sure, they were Ardat-Yakshi, but they were also a part of the Asari. Furthermore, the fact that they were residing on Lesuss had proved that they were in different leagues from Morinth. They were good people, like the rest of those on Illium, on Thessia.

She realised how meaningless her words were on Mars, when she said that she was sorry for the fall of Earth to Ashley. She didn't realise how devastating it was, to fight their own kind, even though their friends were Reaperised and long gone in actual fact. Now that she had experienced it firsthand, it was too horrible for words. Marauders, Brutes, Husks, Cannibals... _And the Banshees. _It was like a perverse collection of Reaperised races.

_Swoosh._ She heard the door to her room open. Judging by the footsteps, she knew who it was. "Hey Liara.". The husky voice that used to make her smile lost its magic today.

"I didn't- I didn't know it would be so...". Her words trailed off. She didn't exactly know what to put to words.

"Hard?". Kaidan sat on the bed. He cupped her chin with a hand and lifted her face up, his black eyes staring warmly and kindly into hers. "Ash told me about it."

"How are we supposed to win this war, Kaidan?"

"They've already lost. They just don't know it yet. We've got Shepard."

"He is only one man."

"Sometimes, that's all the galaxy needs. With him, the Krogan, Asari, Volus, Salarians, Turians, Humans, Hanar, Drell, Elcor, and even the Batarians, they'll all come together, under one flag. Together, we'll exterminate the Reapers, once and for all. We'll end the cycles. We'll do what the Protheans couldn't.". His voice was unwavering, tone sure, confident and doubtless.

But it wasn't enough. "Palaven, Earth, Lesuss, Omega, Horizon, Kahje. What about them?"

"_Thessia, Tuchanka, Sur'Kesh. _They haven't fallen.", he countered. "We've got the full force of Aria's mercs, the Krogan are already helping to liberate the Turian homeworld. All we've got to do now is to get the Quarians to join in the fray. Then, we go to Earth. We eliminate every single Reaper, we rebuild our homeworlds. We start our lives anew, clean slate. We go merrying with _family, friends, loved ones._". Liara fell silent. "_We'll win this._".

"We'll win this?". Her voice was soft, uncertain.

"Definitely.". He leaned in and kissed her softly. His lips were warm, _comforting._ It filled her with renewed hope. "You just gotta believe.", he whispered.

**A/N: Eww! That's enough! *gags* Anyway, I thought of giving Kaidan and Liara some limelight. I didn't want Colburn and Ashley to overshadow everyone else and make this something I really hate. This chapter marks the debut of Liara's POV. I'm trying to do everyone's at least once. If you find anything off about their characterisation, let me know! It's kinda hard juggling so many characters.**

**Edit: Just realised that Tali was in chapter 21. Lol. She's not supposed to be in here. Not yet. I've edited the chapter already.**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Hello, people. I'm glad you guys are loving this thing so far, but do leave a review. I can always do better. I don't mind if you praise me, give me constructive criticism, request for a certain scene with particular characters, or just plain go 'this is a piece of crap! Awful!' (but of course, make sure you actually manage to point out why it's rubbish, or you're just plain trolling otherwise.). I really appreciate the reviews so far. Now that my exams are done and out of the way, all I can do is pray, and write. Never mind me. Let's welcome Kad Dawn, who's our 15th subscriber! Yay! If you asked me if I could reach ten subscribers three weeks ago, I would've thought that having five is already a miracle. Anyway, I think this calls for a celebratory chapter! :D**

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-Normandy, Captain's Quarters-

_Shepard_

"Sometimes I don't know what you're thinking, Skipper. They fired at that dreadnought while we were onboard, and they knew it. _And you told Han'Gerrel you agreed? _". Ashley shook her head in exasperation.

"Wouldn't you have done the same?"

"No!", she shot back. Shepard arched an eyebrow at her. "Okay fine... Maybe... But definitely not with you onboard! We could've all died! _Because of him._"

"I wouldn't be so sure.". The Commander's lips curled into a sly smile.

"What are you getting at, Shepard?"

"Well, for starters, if Cole knew that his girlfriend died under-"

"Woah woah, hold it right there!"

"What?"

"I'm not his _girlfriend,_ Commander. We haven't even gone to first base yet."

"_What? _". Shepard couldn't help but widen his eyes in genuine surprise. He'd always thought that the both of them had established a relationship, but were keeping it under wraps.

Ashley rolled her eyes at his reaction. "Just in case you didn't get the memo, those regs aren't removed yet."

"Don't be silly. You're a marine. He's under the army. You're under different jurisdictions. Besides, both my parents were navy personnel, but they still did the deed anyway. And look where it got me?"

"Yeah. First person in the galaxy to die, come back from the dead, and nearly killed on a Geth dreadnought by _'allies'._ Not really my kinda thing."

"Hey, we could always get Miranda back and start Lazarus 2.0."

"No thanks, Skipper."

"Just kidding. Relax. But let's get back to the real question: why aren't you two getting together yet?"

"Gee. You're starting to talk like Sam now.". Shepard didn't reply, but continued staring at her with his _you're-not-escaping_ look. "Fine. I don't know.". He didn't remove his gaze from her. "It's the truth!"

"How could you not know? For one thing, the attraction's obviously there. He got himself knocked out to save you, and..."

"Spit it out, Skipper, or I'll gut you inside out."

Shepard couldn't help but cringe at the threat. "Well... The Major told me quite a few stories about you two at the Citadel."

"I knew it! I'm _so_ ripping him to shreds."

"Seriously, what's going on between you two?"

"Wish I knew.". _Well, that's a bummer. _The silence was broken with the beeping of his terminal. _An incoming call. _

Shepard walked over to his terminal. The wall displaying his ship models darkened, acting as a large screen. And a pair of familiar dark blue eyes brimming with energy appeared, right eye slightly covered by a strand of chestnut hair. "Hey Shep."

"Cole!". A large grin found its way up the faces of both Ashley and Shepard. "You're back!"

"And good as new.". He noticed Ashley in the background. "Nice to see you too, Ash.". He smiled warmly.

"How are you feeling?"

"Lawson's running checks on me to make sure everything's right. Last thing you want is me shooting you guys from behind."

"You won't.". Ashley's voice was firm.

"Anything can happen. I'm not taking any chances. Also, I've heard you gave my father VIP treatment. Lawson told me about the broken nose. Heard that you also knocked a teeth out."

"Sorry.". Ashley offered him a sheepish smile.

"_Sorry?_ Don't be. He should've seen it coming. Apparently he doesn't know how badass a Williams is.". He gave her a thumbs up.

"So, you're acknowledging him as your father now?". Shepard couldn't help but blurt out what he noticed."

"Well, half the blood in my body's from him. Unless you've got a way to replace my blood, it's truth. Just don't expect me to call him dad or give him a present on Father's Day.". There was an uncomfortable silence. "Anyway, I didn't call to chit-chat. Lawson told me about the deal you made. _What in God's name were you thinking, Shepard? _"

"If I didn't, you wouldn't even be here talking right now."

"Then I'd rather die if I knew."

"Told you so, Skipper."

"Too bad. I'm the CO, not you two. Besides, I don't think you'd be in such a cheery mood if you're dead right now.". Ashley looked down at her boots, while Colburn shifted his eyes towards his keyboard.

"Thanks, Shepard. I'm sorry.". Colburn's voice was apologetic. "I just-"

"You don't have to explain. I understand."

"So what now?". Ashley looked up, her eyes locked on Shepard, saying _thank you._ "We can't possibly go back on our word. If we do, he's going to leak the footage of the Prothean data we got on Mars. The last thing we need right now is for Humanity to lose its trustworthiness again."

"Yeah. Hutcherson's pestering Lawson. He can't wait to get the hell out of this facility and straight to the Citadel."

"But he needs the approval of Shepard, the Councillors, and an Alliance commissioned officer at least the rank of a Rear Admiral or General to get the position.". _Oh right, Ash doesn't know... Here goes..._

"I'm planning on getting my mum to do it.".

Ashley's eyes widened at the mention of General Hannah Shepard. "_What?_ You're just plain crazy, Shepard."

"I didn't have a choice. Besides, she knows everything that's going on. She's also trying to think of a way. But as long as we can't get that bargaining chip off his hands, Hutcherson's untouchable."

"I do have a plan though... But I need a certain contact of yours.". Shepard could see the mental gears clicking and turning in his brain. His XO always had a knack for unconventional methods.

"Who?". Now Shepard was confused. He hadn't known of anyone he knew who could help.

Colburn flashed a really, really, _really_ cunning smile. "Kasumi Goto. Ring a bell?"

**A/N: That's 26 for ya! Please, please, please, post a review! A lot of you subscribers haven't reviewed once yet. I need to know what _all of you_ are thinking. I wanna get this right.**

**For more information on ranks in the Mass Effect universe, read chapter 1.**


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: Lo and behold! Crew sixteen has arrived! Welcome aboard, amac1688! I didn't get a review for 25. I'll admit, it's a filler, but it's essential to me because it's a method to jumpstart on a totally whole other topic while making them feel related at the same time. I still don't know when Cole's coming back though. I don't plan my chapters. It's always _ooh, let's do this! Sounds fun. _And after I finished uploading, I'll go _oh shit, now how do I continue from there?_**

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-somewhere in the middle of nowhere-

_Colburn_

"I've managed to contact him, and he's agreed to meet up. Though I have a feeling the he's gonna jack up the price."

"Where's the location?"

"Chora's Den."

"I thought it got destroyed during the Battle Of The Citadel?"

"Well, it opened up again, _underground._ Basically it's the closest thing you can get to Omega nowadays. And guess who's running the show?"

"_Fist._". The master thief nodded, a smile creeping up her face. "I'm surprised he wasn't on Omega."

"Guy's a lucky bastard. Just arrived on the Citadel when Ceberus hit."

"Shep's gonna regret letting him go three years ago."

"That I agree.". Kasumi paused for a little while. "Should I get the Red Sand?"

"Don't go in person. Get a decoy. Just cloak your way, find out where's their depot, get a suitcase full, then get the hell out. The last thing we want is getting discovered. Besides, it's kind of an honour for their Red Sand to do something good for once. Never thought I'd say this, but Red Sand probably just saved all our asses."

"I like the way you think. By the way, your father's kind of paranoid. He's keeping tabs on everyone, especially Shepard. Want me to find out who his mole in the Alliance?"

"No need for that. It's just small fry. Just watch out for yourself. You're our only shot at this."

"Puh-lease, Colburn. You're talking to the best thief this galaxy has ever known. I'm a little disappointed at the lack of confidence."

"I would've done it myself, _if_ I wasn't still stuck in this wheelchair on this God-forsaken station."

"I don't think you'd do good at stealth."

"Really?". He arched an eyebrow in amusement. "So what do you think I'm good at?"

"For starters, you've got a glib tongue. How about that?"

"Granted. What can I say? I'm charming."

"Someone's got a big ego."

"Whatever.". He rolled his eyes. "Let's get started. We ain't got much time."

"Keep your eyes peeled.". And with that, the master thief disconnected. Colburn's terminal faded to black. The silence was welcoming. It gave him an opportunity to think and ponder about all that had happened around him. The past few months had most certainly been eventful.

First, the Reapers invaded Earth, somehow managed to wound up in a slightly awkward and most definitely mysterious relationship/friendship with Ashley, had his father suddenly reappear in his life, serving alongside Humanity's greatest icon, and getting himself knocked out _four times_, and indoctrinated. It was overwhelming, to say the least. Everything was a shipwreck.

He couldn't help but sigh loudly. He was tired, not just physically, but mentally as well. _Maybe I should retire after all this bullshit. Oh right, provided you survive. _

His terminal blinked, alternating between green and white. He turned on his screen to find a message from Lawson_. Have you got everything in place?_

His fingers flew over the keyboard. _Yeah. Kasumi's on it. All it's lacking now is the final execution._

_Get prepared. We're leaving tomorrow for the Citadel_. The link promptly disconnected.

"_Finally! _", he grumbled to himself. _Oh well, might as well check in on Ash._

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-Normandy, Captain's Quarters-

_Ashley_

"Come on, Skipper. It's not your fault."

"I let a friend die today."

"The Geth- Legion, I mean, it willingly laid down its uh, life to broker peace between his race and the Quarians. You couldn't have done anything."

"Mordin, Wrex, Legion, Thane, Colburn... Who's next?"

"The Salar- Mordin,", she corrected, "died to cure the Genophage. Wrex gave up his life in honour. Legion brokered peace. Hell, we've got hundreds of Geth Primes on our side now. Thane got stabbed by that bastard Kai Leng, not you. Cole knew the risks when he signed up. He doesn't blame you. _No one does._"

"She's right, Shepard. Don't put everything on your shoulders.". Kaidan placed a reassuring hand on his Commander's shoulder.

"But they died to ensure that I succeeded in my missions."

Ashley placed her hands on her hips in irritation. She couldn't seem to convince her CO that everything wasn't his fault. She opened her mouth to argue, but received a slow yet firm shake of the head from Kaidan. _Fine,_ she mouthed, and they both exited the room. As soon as the doors shut, she started to speak out loud. "What are you doing, Alenko? We're supposed to be counselling him!"

"I don't think arguing counts as counselling, LC. Give him a moment to think things through. He's Shepard. He can handle himself."

"You better hope you're right, Major."

"That, I'm sure of.". He gave her a wink as they entered the elevator.

"How's Liara?"

"She's fine. She's a fighter."

"With your kisses and all that, sure she is.". Kaidan blushed at the statement. _That hit the spot. _

"Wh-what? Wh-who... How...", he stuttered, cheeks taking on a reddening hue by the second. _Payback!_

Ashley got out and walked straight to her room, pretending not to notice his amusing reaction, and leaving him standing in the lift, too stunned for words. It was only when her doors shut that she let out a loud laughter. Kaidan's obvious embarrassment was long overdue. She probably would've giggled to herself for eternity if her terminal didn't start to beep. Who could it be?

She turned on her terminal to find a very welcome face.

"Cole?"

"Hey Ash.", he said simply.

"What-"

"Figured we didn't have a chance to speak a little more privately the previous time."

She recalled the incident at Shepard's cabin. "Oh."

"I guess... I should apologise."

"Why should you?"

"I didn't tell you about the indoctrination thing and all."

"I'm not mad at you."

"Don't lie to me. I psych people, remember?"

She hadn't wanted to touch on that topic, but since he was insistent, _why the hell not?_ "Fine! I'm pissed off, alright? I'm sick and tired of you keeping everything from me. I annoyed that you're keeping me in the dark! Hell, if you were here right now, I'd give you a punch to the jaw!"

"Okay... I deserve that. I'm sorry.". Ashley couldn't bring herself to shout anymore. Her heartrate was too damn high. "Better?"

_Deep breath... _She counted to ten. "Yeah, much. Thanks."

"I told you, it was my fault."

And then she was angry again. "Why the hell are you two taking every single Goddamn mistake as your fault?"

"What do you mean _'us two'_ ?"

"It's Shepard.", she said flatly.

"What's going on?". And so, she recounted the day's events, from disabling a Reaper signal, to taking down an actual Reaper on foot, and of course, Shepard's sudden outburst of self-despair. "Kaidan's right. He probably just snapped a little under all that pressure. Just let him think by himself for a bit."

"And how do you know?"

"I should. Was a little down when Lawson confined me to this wheelchair. Grumbled a bit, but good old solitude helped me out."

"Woah, back up! _You're in a wheelchair? _I thought indoctrination was just the brain!"

"Well, I kinda tried to get up too quickly. Fell down and injured a knee. Miss Perfect wouldn't let move on my feet. So, yeah, I'm kinda grounded."

"Well, that was anti-climactic."

"So I've heard."

"So how's everything going on?"

"My father's back at the Citadel. With the letters signed by both Shepard and his mother, they let him assume the position."

"So, what? We just gonna let him get comfy?"

"Nah. He's just a seat-warmer. Let's just say that I've got a few tricks up my sleeve."

"Wow. Care to let me in on your evil scheme?". Her tone was flat and sarcastic, but God knew she was dying to learn more.

"It's supposed to be a surprise! So, nope. Sorry.". He gave her a mischievous grin.

"Just make sure the show's on time. We're heading to the Citadel now. Apparently the Asari Councillor's willing to help."

"And what made you think I don't know you're coming?"

"I don't know. Lawson's a pretty good source of distraction."

"Oh my. Is that jealousy I hear?". Ashley tried not to panic at his words. Mostly because it was true.

_Relax... Just get straight to the point. _"Maybe. Maybe not. Cole... I need to ask you something."

"I think I know what it's about."

"So? What's your answer?"

"Maybe it's not such a good idea."

"Why?"

"You've worked your ass off to get to where you are today. I'm not destroying that."

"That's bullshit! And where do you think Shepard came from?"

"Well, his mom didn't have to deal with a blacklisted family name. His dad didn't have a father who's a bloody traitor."

"You do know that we could die anytime right now, right?"

"That's the point. No use in starting something that doesn't have a happy ending!"

"Oh, and the same goes for fighting the Reapers! Does that mean we just raise the white flag and give in?"

"You're ridiculous!"

"I'm right and you know that!". The both of them were breathing heavily, seemingly ready to rip each other's throats.

Colburn seemed to calm down first. "Listen, now's not the time. There's too much going on at once. We'll settle this later, in person. I promise.". She didn't reply, but merely stared at the background. "Goodnight.". And he disconnected. Ashley stood up and literally collapsed onto her bed. She was frustrated and angry. _Why couldn't he just stop planning ahead for once?_

Her eyes shifted towards the Black Widow resting on her workbench. Shepard had deliberately installed one for her in her room after they reached the Citadel for the first time. He knew she had never let go of her Gunnery Chief persona. _She never could._ The days aboard the SR1 were cherished memories. It was the first time that her commanding officer wasn't put off by her family history, and in fact appreciated her talents and put them to good use. He had made her feel good enough, a marine worthy of serving aboard the Alliance's finest tin can, and not just a substitute for another soldier who died in the line of duty. She treasured a superior like Shepard. She knew there was no else like him in the rest of the galaxy. Even Hackett was light-years away.

Slowly, she got to her feet and made her way slowly to the workbench. Her fingertips lightly brushed over the expensive sniper rifle. Ever since that day at Rodam's Expeditions, she'd brought it along on every mission, and had nearly purchased every single upgrade and mod, to the point where Cortez would try to get his hands on the latest gear he heard of, and then deliver it to her.

She let out a sigh. Anything she wanted to clarify would have to wait. But first, she had to blow off some steam before she lost her sanity. She punched in a few keys on her Omni-tool.

"Ashley, need me for something?", a deep flanging voice blasted from her Omni-tool. A smile crept its way up her lips.

"Vakarian, I don't care how much calibrating you've got to do. About that rematch you were talking about..."

**A/N: I'm kinda having second thoughts about the Cole and Ashley part. Should I take this chapter down? **

**Ps, in case you haven't noticed, I don't really write about what takes place during missions. Why bother when you guys already know what happened, right?**


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: I think Lady Luck's shining on me recently. We have crew 17 & 18! Warm welcome to eddy4079 and Soviet Defector! You know, we might just end up with twenty subscribers before this ends. As you know, we're reaching the end soon. There's probably less than seven chapters left, I think. But don't worry, it ain't the last we'll be seeing of Colburn, Shep & co. I have two other series planned out. One would be about the interactions between our lovely Captain, Major and Lieutenant Commander during that six months, while the other would be a spin off series that doesn't have a plot to it (random happenings, like day-to-day events, I don't know. It's just going to be plain hilarious.). So, I _absolutely, strongly encourage, highly request all of you_to _subscribe_ to my _account,_ so that you'll get the notifications when I publish them.**

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-Citadel, Bay D24-

_Colburn_

"Nice to have you back aboard, Captain.". Shepard shook Colburn's hand.

"What? I've only been gone for five minutes and you're going all formal on me?". He reciprocated the gesture.

"Well then, you'd better stop getting your ass kicked under my command. It's gonna look bad on my resume."

"That's better!". He beamed brightly at Shepard's informal manner. But the smile left as quickly as it came. Colburn gestured for them to walk, and both men made their way towards the elevator. "Just in time for the show. The official ceremony's starting in about forty five minutes."

"What ceremony?"

"The Human Councillor thing.". Colburn made an airquote as he spoke. "And, that's when the kicker's coming in, and I start my acting career."

"You're kidding.". Shepard sounded uncomfortable at the mention of _'acting career'._

"I'm severely distraught by the lack of faith, _sir._". Colburn placed emphasis on the last word, shooting him a sly look as he did so. Shepard rolled his eyes.

Shepard stepped out as soon as the elevator reached the Embassies. "I've got to go see the Asari Councillor.". He pointed a thumb towards the direction of the offices.

"Good. I've got uh, _last minute preparations_ to do anyway.". Colburn shot the Commander a devilish smirk. "See you later."

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_Shepard_

The first Human Spectre couldn't help but smile to himself while making his way to the office of the Asari Councillor. His XO always had methods of making the impossible feel like a piece of cake. Nothing could ever seem to faze Colburn. He had gotten straight back into action right after the incident on Mars, tried to fight back in more ways than one even though he was tortured, tried to deal with indoctrination by himself, and then somehow still manage to think of a solution right after gaining consciousness.

If it were Shepard... Well, he would've just started mumbling and whispering to himself like a nutcase if he ever found himself to be indoctrinated, that's for one. But it also worried him. Colburn's way of handling issues seemed too... _Emotionally detached?_ He had no qualms about trying to set up his father and shaming in front of the rest of the galaxy, for that matter. And the way he simply shrugged off Alchera and the recent indoctrination incident, as if he was merely suffering from a sprained ankle, _no big deal._ It was like he had something to prove, which kind of reminded him of Ashley aboard the SR1, when she was still Gunnery Chief.

There was something slightly menacing about the man, as if he would've taken his time skinning a childhood friend alive, making his friend wishing he were dead rather than alive should he betray him. Shepard's blood ran cold at the horrifying thought. _Shake out of it!_ He had managed to arrange his features back into the _'I'm Commander Shepard, I can help you.'_ look just as the doors to the Councillor's office opened.

"Commander Shepard. Come in.". The Asari's voice bore no trace of emotion.

"Councillor, you didn't explain it too clearly over the comm. What did you want us to do?"

"As we speak, my people are preparing for an oncoming Reaper invasion on Thessia.". Again, her tone was flat.

_What?_ He cleared his throat. "I'm sorry? I didn't catch that.". He was hoping he had heard it wrongly, that she would tell him something else. _No such luck._

The Councillor seemed to not have heard him. "Of course, they aren't here yet, but they will be. _Soon enough._". _Well isn't that encouraging? _"Civilians are evacuated as we speak, but I've stationed our most elite of commandoes to guard the Temple of Athame."

"A temple?"

"Not just a temple.". Shepard could see that the Councillor was hesitating. "It houses a Prothean beacon."

His eyes widened. "A Prothean beacon? And the Asari just kept it from the rest of the galaxy? So much for Citadel law!"

"We had thought of surrendering it, but we were afraid of the severe political repercussions." _Sure, and now we're on the verge of total annihilation. _"But now that the Reapers are coming, we need to salvage it. It could provide valuable data for the Crucible."

Shepard forced his voice to remain neutral. "Don't worry Councillor. We'll make sure we get to it.". He glanced at the clock on the far wall. _Fifteen minutes left. _Apparently the Councillor noticed the subtle movement.

"You should get going, Commander. I'll just be a moment.".

He took it as a cue to exit the office and made his way towards the indoor amphitheatre of somesort, built specifically for useless, exaggerated events, like say, _inauguration of a new Citadel Councillor. _

As soon as he reached the entrance, a Turian donning the C-Sec uniform approached him. "Welcome, Commander Shepard. Follow me please.". The officer ushered him to a row of seats, occupied by familiar faces. Ashley was present, so was Kaidan, Liara, Vega, as well as Tali, their resident Quarian Ambassador. Mysteriously, Garrus wasn't around. Shepard suspected it had something to do with his XO, who was also absent.

"Hey Skipper.". She gestured for him to take up the seat beside her. She was sitting between two empty seats, and was sitting at the second one from the end. He took the one further in, so that Colburn had the one at the end. He would probably need the ease of access later on.

Shepard settled himself on the rock hard seat, which he suspected was constructed deliberately to prevent the audience from falling asleep. He noticed the unusual expression on the soldier's face. "Spit it, LC."

"Spit _what?_ ". Her tone was defensive. _Another telltale sign._

"Something's bothering you.". She didn't reply. He lowered his volume, making sure that only she could hear it. "It's Colburn, isn't it?"

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_Ashley_

_God, since when did he get so good at this?_

Shepard let out a long "Ahhhh...".

"You sound like a Vorcha!". He gestured for her to continue. "_Sir._". He gave by exaggerated nod of approval. She elbowed him in the shoulder in retaliation.

"Can you tell me what's going now?"

"Well... I uh, I talked to Colburn the other night..."

"Let me guess: he said _'no'._"

"Damn it Shepard! You're freaking me out with the whole mind-reading thing."

"You're just an open book to read.". She jabbed him again, this time making sure that it was hard enough to leave a bruise. "Oww! Watch it LC!". She stifled a laugh as he rubbed his arm. "Well, what did he say?"

"You know, all that crap on fraternisation. We started to shout, and uh, he disconnected. He said that it wasn't really the time to talk, with everything going on and all. He told me we'd talk later."

"You have to admit, jumping on him like that through vid-comm isn't the brightest of ideas."

"You know me, always talking before thinking."

"Well, thinking then talking wouldn't be Ashley Williams, would it?"

She smiled a little. "Thanks Commander. But maybe he's right. Maybe we're too different, too far apart."

"Really? You two seem pretty similar."

"We have nothing in common. I'm just a soldier. I shoot guns on the battlefield. He's a warrior on the stage.". She sighed. "Even on dirtside, we have different combat styles. I time my shots at the back with a sniper. He's a vanguard, charging on the frontlines, just rushing with an assault rifle."

"Well, the differences end there.". Shepard started to count with his fingers. "One, you two are as stubborn as bulls. Two, you guys put family on top priority. Three, you're the same age. Four... Erm, you guys aren't blonde?". He gave her his puppy-dog eyes, trying to convey that he had done his best.

She shook her head in amusement. "Seriously? That's the best you can do?". He gave her an apologetic shrug of the shoulders. "Fine... I'll give you one more: we both fight for what we believe in."

"See? That wasn't so hard.". _Leave it to him to turn a failure into a success._

"What's so hard?". _Oh crap, speak of the devil. _It took all her willpower to stop from running away. She slowly turned her head from Shepard to find Colburn sitting beside her. She'd half-heartedly expected Colburn to avoid her. Then again, he wasn't just an ordinary guy.

"The seats. I think they did it on purpose, so you know, the audience don't fall asleep.". Shepard's answer was downright lame, but surprisingly convincing.

Colburn opened his mouth to speak, but a deafening voice blasted through the air instead. The ceremony was starting. _Thank God. _Ashley wouldn't have known what to say if it hadn't started.

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_Garrus_

It was like the old days, just crouching in a corner, right eye peering through the scope of his Mantis, intently following his target's movement. Then again, it was nothing like the past. In the past, he wasn't training his rifle at the _legs_ of his target. Colburn had made him promise to only shoot the scumbag at the non-critical areas. _Well, how about the nuts?_

Garrus didn't know how long the Councillors had been talking. He wasn't interested in knowing how far the galaxy had come. All he knew was that the spot he was camping at was a little too cramped. It housed not only him, but a fellow human female as well. His legs were starting to lose their sensation.

"Stop fidgeting!". Kasumi jerked Garrus back into position.

"You know how tall I am? My feet are getting numb."

"Just concentrate! It's his turn now!". She shushed him. True enough, there was a loud sound of applause just as she finished her sentence. Garrus readjusted his sniper, crosshair moving along as Hutcherson walked.

"First of all, let me say how honoured I am to be able to be a part of the galaxy's biggest and most successful political body to date! Under governance of the Citadel Council, we have united as one! The Hanar and Drell, the Asari, Salarian, Turian, Volus. More recently, the Quarian race has also had their first ambassador!". Garrus' gaze subconsciously drifted towards Tali at the mention of _'Quarian ambassador'._ Kasumi gave a cough and he quickly reverted his attention to the scope. _Thank the spirits Turian can't blush._ "- I will do my best to serve the galaxy, and making up for the folly of my predecessor. Thank you.". There was again, a loud sound of applause, which quickly ended just as a video listing the human's achievements started to play.

The both of them briefly looked in the direction of Colburn. He also glanced up, giving them an understanding nod. Kasumi smirked. "_Showtime._". He readied his Mantis again, finger lightly pressed against the trigger. Kasumi activated her Omni-tool, and the large screen abruptly faded to black, only to show Hutcherson again, except this time, he was smiling happily, opening a suitcase, _full of Red Sand_. A loud series of gasps broke out through the amphitheatre, peppered with countless '_Oh_'s and '_what? _'s.

Garrus couldn't help but chuckle at his friend's ingenuity. "There's more, Vakarian. _Watch._". The master thief brought up her Omni-tool once more, and soon enough, an audio file was played through the massive speakers. No doubt, there was Hutcherson's voice, as well as someone's he never expected: _Colburn._ That prompted the Turian to listen closely.

"Stop this before it's too late dad!". Garrus' mandibles flared a little at the choice of terms. Colburn calling Hutcherson _'dad'_ was wrong on all levels.

"You can't stop me, Miles! Do you have any idea how lucrative Red Sand is?".

"I'll get the evidence and stop you!"

Garrus noticed something off about the pitch and tone. He couldn't quite place it to words, but it definitely wasn't the weasel himself. He raised a questioning brow plate at his companion, and Kasumi replied with an indignant glare. "What? Voice constructing programmes were created for a reason!".

He turned back to his rifle. After Kasumi, it was his dance now. As expected, C-Sec guards moved forward, pistol in hand. Commander Bailey was leading. "Mr Hutcherson, we need you to come with us."

"Like hell I will!". Hutcherson took out a pistol of his own, and dragged the Salarian Councillor in front of him as a shield, gun pointed at Esheel's temple. "I was set up! I don't do Re-". His sentence was cut off by a gunshot. Garrus' aim hit home, unsurprisingly. He had planned to shoot the asshole in the quads, but figured that it would be too cruel. After all, the poor bloke would have hell raining on him later on.

Everyone in the audience stood up and started to run for the exit and the sound of the gunshot. "_Sayonara._", he heard Kasumi mock.

Bailey was issuing orders again. "Robinson, Charles, get him!". He pointed to another duo of Turians. "You two, come with me! Look for the sniper!".

Kasumi's hushed voice broke him out of his reverie. "Come on! We gotta go before they find us!". She helped him to his feet, and they made a mad dash for the vent exit.

_Spirits! My legs hurt!_

**A/N: I probably would've written longer, but I thought the word count was high enough already. It took me two days to get this done. I was afraid of Garrus going out of character or the Cole/Ash thing being too awkward. Tell me how you feel! I slaved for this!**


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: And yet another subscriber! Say hello to TheUltraGrands! Damn, that's nineteen now! One more to twenty! Hoped you guys liked the Garrus part last chapter. **

**Ps: I find it wierd no one mentioned about the calamari gumbo part... I was laughing my ass of while I wrote it.**

-Citadel, big freaking conference hall-

_Shepard_

"Would you care to explain, Commander Shepard?"

"I apologise, Councillors. It was a grave mistake for me to recommend him as the Ambassador for Humanity. He was good at hiding his trails. No one knew what he was really up to.". Shepard stole a quick glance at their new captive, handcuffed and on his knees. Despite the severity of the current situation, he had to stifle a laugh. Hutcherson was shot in the upper thigh, the wound ominously close to his tender bits. _Real subtle, Vakarian._

"Well, I suppose we all make mistakes. Given this man's wit, it's no wonder he has managed to keep it under wraps. However, we have a question for Captain Colburn. Why didn't you tell us about your relationship with _him?_ ". _Is the Turian calling me stupid?_

"I'm very sorry, Councillors. I have long renounced my kinship with him. As I had no evidence against him, I could not accept your offer of Spectre until he was put to justice. But now that everything has come to light...". Colburn trailed off. If Shepard hadn't known better, he would've thought that his XO was genuinely looking forward to being a Spectre. His acting was _that_ good. _Such guile._

"We apologise, Captain.". Esheel sounded a little embarrassed. "After we have knowledge of your kinship with our newest criminal, we have regretfully revoked our offer. We are sorry."

"I understand.". Colburn's tone had just the right amount of bitterness in it. Shepard was impressed. _Very impressed._

"Now that the truth has come to light, that the both of you know nothing, you are released of all charges. However, I hope nothing similar ever happens again.". Apparently, the Asari Councillor was eager for them to get to Thessia. He had never seen her so quick to forgive.

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-Bay D24-

_Colburn_

The talk with the Council had gone easier than expected. He wasn't anticipating them to let them off the hook so fast. They were making their way back to the Normandy, with Shepard looking at him every so often. "What? Something on my face?"

"You ever thought of being an actor? Got them pretty good down there."

"Says the guy who didn't have confidence in my acting career less than six hours ago."

"Hey, when you're right, you're right. I admit, I wasn't expecting such a performance. Getting your father caught, and having the Council voluntarily revoke the offer... We could all learn a thing or two from you.". Colburn scoffed at the compliment. "Though there's one thing... Aren't you afraid of him showing them the footage of us on Mars?"

"Oh don't worry. Your old friend Kasumi took care of it."

"So you're on a first name basis with her now?". Colburn glared at him. "Just kidding... Relax."

"What are trying to say?". Colburn knew what Shepard was getting at, and he didn't like it. "If it's Ashley, then just shut up."

Shepard moved up to block him. "What's going on, Cole? I know there's something going on between you two."

"_With all due respect,_ Commander, it's none of your business.". Colburn tried to move past Shepard, but the CO wasn't one to give in so easily.

"It's my business when my LC's distracted. You have to trust us, Cole. We can't help you if you don't tell anyone anything."

"_I don't need help._ On the contrary, how many times have I saved your asses? If I need something done, I'll solve it myself. _It's that simple. _Besides, I've made it clear to her. It's not going to work. I'm just giving her time to come to her senses.". Shepard went silent. He was speechless. "If you'll excuse me, I'm tired from the past few days, so I'll go get some rest.". He brushed past Shepard and made his way inside the Normandy.

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-Normandy, cockpit-

_Kaidan_

Kaidan felt as if he just watched a vid, or rather, he felt like he was part of a vid. Estranged father-son relationship? _Check._ Said relationship exposed in public? _Yep._ Dramatic shootout? _Yes._ Everything was just part of a script? _Sadly no._

"I still can't believe it!". Kaidan snapped back to reality at the sound of Joker's voice. "I mean, really? I've always thought the guy was kinda cold at handling matters... But using kinship to get his father arrested? Wow. That's a whole new personal low."

"That is incorrect, Jeff. Captain Colburn has long made known of the fact that he has cut all ties with Gregory Hutcherson. He does not consider him as family, or even an acquaintance anymore."

"There's a saying, EDI. Blood's thicker than water. You don't just sever a relationship with an announcement. Hutcherson's blood flows in Cole. You can't change that. Besides-". Joker was interrupted mid-sentence by the familiar mechanical whirring of the airlock opening. A second later, their XO came storming into the ship, ignoring the salutes from the crew and just stomping his way towards the elevator. "Oops."

Kaidan shook his head and sighed. "EDI, can you get a view of Cole's room?". Given what had just happened, he figured Colburn would do something stupid again: _drinking._

"I'm sorry, Major. The Captain has removed all monitoring devices.".

_Damn it. _He pulled up a small window on his console. "Hey Ash, you might want to check up on someone..."

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_Colburn_

The cool water had done nothing to calm himself down. As soon as Colburn reached his room, he went straight for the bathroom. He set the temperature console to _maximum cold_, and proceeded to dunk his head into the sink-ful of icy cold water. He held his breath, trying to remain submerged for as long as he could, before coming up for air. He stared at the mirror. He couldn't recognise himself. They were the same chocolate brown hair, the same sapphire-blue eyes, but they were different at the same time, _foreign._

His mind went back to twelve years ago, just before all the bullshit started. That young teenager, happy-go-lucky, carefree, tactless, acting based on emotions and self-proclaimed justice. He had gotten into fights just because he thought he was 'standing up for others'. It had took him six months of being on the run from his own father with a Spectre, and another three months of completing assassination contracts with Zaeed, that he realised that not everyone wanted to be protected, not everyone on the receiving end was a victim, that some were content to live under the tyrannical abuse of others, that not everyone _could_ be saved. He had seen much, heard much, learnt much, but not without a cost.

He had learnt to let go and give up, to respect the wishes of others, to not insist on helping when others rejected his assistance. He had learnt that zero casualties was nothing more than a fairytale in times of battle and war. But it was through firsthand experiences which he had been taught by.

It was during his stint with Zaeed. They were hired by a Volus to take the life of a business competitor, a Turian. _That bastard hired lowlifes to burn down my warehouse,_ he said. But it was only after the job had been completed, that they found out the Volus had gotten someone to cripple the Turian's son in the first place.

Then, there was his time with his mentor, the Spectre. He was assigned to take down a Red Sand dealer, and had brought his protege along to learn. There, they witnessed that the dealer's trade not only consisted of narcotics, but also slavery, prostitution, every sort of illegal activity imaginable. He saw hundreds of young Asari, human girls less than twenty of age, trapped, shackled, beaten up, _and God forbid_, sexually abused. He had offered to free them, but they simply shook their heads. _No! I don't want to get hit anymore! Please, just leave us alone, _one of them told him. His mentor had dissuaded him. _There's too many of them, you can't save them all. Even if we could, the dealer would get away. His arrest is of utmost importance. _And so he left them there. They had caught up with the criminal, but he committed suicide by blowing up the whole area, bringing along his henchmen and slaves as well. They had barely managed to escape unscathed.

Colburn studied the face looking back at him in the reflection. _Familiar brown hair, blue eyes,_ but in the gaze, held the acceptance of the harshness of reality, the cruelty of life. The vibrant innocence it once had was long gone. Then it hit him: _the young boy that contained the much cherished naivete was Miles Hutcherson. _In a fit of anger, he punched the mirror, shattering it to smithereens. The spider-cracks caused a mosaic-like effect, multiple mini-images showing on the shards of glass remaining on the frame, seemingly mirroring the countless masks and facades he had constructed to show others.

_Miles Hutcherson is gone for good! He died twelve years ago! _He needed something to stabilise himself. He pushed himself off the sink and into the shower, turning the ice cold water to full blast. He slid down the wall, and collapsed onto the metallic floor in a heap, letting the torrent of cool salvation beat down on his face relentlessly.

Slowly, he closed his eyes, hoping that time could just stand still.

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_Ashley_

Ashley hadn't directly gone to Colburn's quarters at once. She didn't know if she was welcome, not after their most recent conversation anyway. Instead, she sat at her workbench, cleaning the dismantled parts of her Black Widow. _Go? Or don't go? _She felt like one of those lovesick idiotic characters from those romance vids that Lynn loved to watch. Of course, she wasn't plucking off the petals of a rose, but it still felt dumb.

After five minutes, she couldn't stand it anymore. Curiosity _-and concern-_ was killing her, and she made her way to the elevator before she could change her mind. Thankfully, no one else was around, and she made it to his room without anyone's knowledge. She expected a bottle of Serrice Ice Brandy to appear on his table, but it was nowhere to be seen. Instead, she heard the unmistakable _pitta-patter_ of drops of water hitting the floor. Noticing the door to the bathroom open, she peered in, only to see Colburn sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall, with one bloodied knuckle. She turned her head to the left and immediately saw the smashed mirror, _or what was left of it anyway._ She turned back to him. His uniform was soaking wet, hair plastered to his head, blood flowing freely from his left knuckle, mixing with the water.

Ashley didn't know what to do, so she opted to sit down beside him. In less than a minute, she was drenched too, as if standing in the middle of a monsoon downpour. The water was exceptionally cold, and she glanced at the temperature control: _maximum cold. _She thanked her time guarding the garrisons, where cold showers were the norm and hot ones a much prized luxury. "Hey.", she said gently. _No response._ "What's up?". _Nothing._ "Anything you'd like to share?". She mentally smacked herself as soon as it came out of her mouth. _Of course he doesn't want to share! He would've told you if he did!_ "You know, at the rate you keep things to yourself, you'll run out of space in the backyard sooner or later."

He replied only after a long period of silence. "Have you ever felt like you've lost yourself?". She didn't answer. She didn't understand. _She couldn't. _He continued on. "Time's a scary thing, you know? It causes people to change... And you don't even realise it until it hits you in the gut.". She remained silent. Ashley was having trouble relating. She had always stuck to one rule and one rule only: _following what she believed in._ Colburn was mumbling again, to himself or her, she didn't know. "Everyone around you... _Disappointing._ They let you down time and time again, you vow to never follow in their footsteps, then you find yourself doing the exact same thing."

The statement wasn't making more sense than the previous ones, but the last sentence gave her a path to stumble on. She was like a blindfolded person navigating in a maze, but she wasn't going to throw in the towel, _not without attempting at least. _"You're worried?", she started. "You're worried you'll fail us, like the Alliance, like Ceberus, like...". _Your dad. _He remained motionless. "I'm not going to pretend I know you. But I'm trying, and I'm planning to succeed or die trying.". She grasped his hand, to show him she meant it. "But you have to show me if I'm heading in the right direction or not.".

She didn't know how he would react. She had made her intentions perfectly clear. If he was still... _Well, she would have to accept it as what it was, then. _Colburn slowly shook his head. "You don't _need_ to do this. You don't _have_ to do this."

"But I _want_ to.", she countered.

"Are you ready to deal with the consequences?"

Her lips curled into a smile. "Williams women only do things when they're ready. _Not before, not after_."

His hand gripped hers tighter.

**A/N: Okay, that's it! Anymore and I'll puke! Hope you guys liked this. I struggled to get this out, as this is an area that I've never dared to venture into before. And before you start thinking of something wierd, nothing, _absolutely nothing_ happened between them after this scene. Cold water isn't exactly a libido booster. Lol.**

**Note: My _official, actual_ 'O' levels Chinese paper is on 28 May. Thus, updates will be slightly slower.**

**Oh, and I suggest listening to 'Sympathy' by Karmina during the second Colburn part (the toilet one).**


	30. Chapter 30

-Normandy, cockpit, while Shepard, Liara and Garrus are on Thessia-

_Colburn_

The mission on Thessia was smooth-sailing, so to speak - so far anyway. The resistance the ground team met were expected, and despite the numerous bad news coming from the commandos over the comm, Shepard and his team were making good progress towards the Temple of Athame. The Normandy had also helped out, gunning down Harvesters with their upgraded Thanix Cannons. But of course, hiccups soon popped up - _they always did._

"Hey Cole, I think you wanna see this.". Joker's voice lacked the usual tone of mischief, which was setting off alarms in Colburn's mind. True enough, what he saw wasn't good, to say the least. "What the hell is that?". The helmsman pointed a finger at the unidentified blob on the ladar.

"Hold on a sec...", Kaidan said from his seat. He typed in a few commands on his console. "The signal's similar to the one on Horizon..."

_Ceberus._ "EDI, can you get to Shepard?

There a momentary period of silence before the AI spoke. "Negative. Comms are blocked.". _Damn it._

"_Great._". Joker's voice was seething with sarcasm. "What do we do now?"

"EDI, get Vega. You two are coming with me. Joker, I want you ripping that Ceberus ship to pieces. Alenko, you're in charge"

"Aye aye!"

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_Vega_

"Damn it!". Vega grunted as he tried to make himself as protected as possible behind a low barricade set up by the commandoes. A torrent of bullets had rained on the squad of three as soon as the shuttle's doors opened. They'd barely managed to find cover before any of them got shot. Beside him, Colburn cursed as a round buzzed dangerously close over his head.

"Come on, Vega! Wreck some havoc in there!", he ordered. Vega waited until the gunfire had subsided a little, before launching a Carnage shot at a group of Marauders. The projectile immediately set two on fire, and gradually spread to four others.

"That's more like it!"

"More hostiles incoming!". EDI fired her submachine gun at a pair of Brutes.

"Vega!", Colburn hollered. In unison, both of them tossed a frag grenade and a cluster grenade together. The devastating mix of brute explosion and biotic detonation immediately took out the giants.

The Lieutenant opened his mouth to taunt, only for an unexpected yelp to escape his lips as a burst of pain suddenly flared in his right leg. He collapsed onto the ground as his left leg couldn't support his massive weight alone. He glanced down to see a bloody hole in his upper thigh. "Ah fuck it!"

Colburn fired his assault rifle into the distance, then knelt down to check on his wound. "Damn, that Marauder got you pretty good."

Vega gritted his teeth to keep from wincing. "I'm... Fine..."

"You're _not,_ big guy. It's a plasma round. You need medical attention fast. EDI, get him back to the shuttle."

"Just a scratch, no big deal."

"Yeah it's not, _until you get an infection and have to get it amputated_.". Vega silently cursed. "First lesson of N7: insubordination is _not_ allowed."

"Technically you're not my superior, remember? I'm a marine."

"Since when did you start playing the talking game? And for the record, I'm your XO. That's a direct order, LT. You can either go with EDI, or I'll have her knock you out."

"_Fine._"

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_Colburn_

Colburn would've died at least ten times on his way to Shepard if there weren't any of the commandoes to assist him. Their sharpshooting skills and incredible biotics had saved his life. Going solo was a lot harder than expected, but he managed to scrape past through anyway.

But there came the inevitable time where he could no longer enjoy the reinforcements of the Asari and had to depend on himself to survive again. Colburn brought up the GPS on his visor's HUD. _200 metres to Temple of Athame._ He muttered a curse as he saw a horde of Husks headed towards him, with a Harvester flying menacingly low in the background. It didn't matter how close he was to his destination if he was going to die before reaching. "Joker, a little fire support would be _real_ nice."

"I've got three Harvesters on my tail, damn it! You're on your own!"

_Fuck me. _He tossed two of his cluster grenades into the horde, killing most of the Husks, and picking off the stray ones with his Mattock. Thankfully, the Harvester had flown somewhere else. He made a mad dash for the temple. As he got closer, he could make out a gunship hovering in the sky, _and two familiar figures fighting._

Kai Leng was sparring sword-on-Omni-blade with Shepard, while Garrus and Liara were trying to get to their feet. The fight was slowly inching its way towards the gunship, with Shepard struggling to keep up with the fast moves of the Ceberus assassin. Shepard was too slow, and was flung to the side by Kai Leng. Seeing that their enemy was escaping, Colburn did the only think he could think of that would salvage the situation.

_The world around him glowed a familiar purplish-blue as he felt his body phase through all solid objects blocking him from his target._

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_Shepard_

Shepard was _positively sure _he was seeing stars. In bright daylight? _Yep, definite brain damage. _The sight in front of him was a blur. Something blue was on top of his foe, and scuffling around, making his vision even more hazy. He could only make out a person, covered in a bluish hue, raising an arm to punch the assassin right across the face. He rapidly blinked his eyes, and his vision cleared. It was Colburn, rolling around with Kai Leng, _blocking, jabbing, punching._ If they weren't fighting for their lives, it would've been funny. The Ceberus lapdog was at the bottom, and swung a mechanical arm at the vanguard. Instead of dodging, since blocking the blow would surely result in a shattered arm, Colburn had leapt off Kai Leng, allowing the assassin to escape. The Commander hurried got to his feet, and grabbing the nearby pistol, and gave a futile chase.

Kai Leng had already reached the shuttle, and it took off immediately. Shepard emptied the whole clip of rounds at the shuttle in frustration. "Damn it!", he shouted.

Just then, a sudden voice came through his earpiece. "Is anyone on this channel? Hello?"

"This is Shepard! Give me your coordinates."

"Is anyone there? Anybody left? We're- _Oh Goddess! _The Reapers are here! Somebody help us! Noooo! Help-". The comm abruptly lost connection.

"This is Shepard! Come in!". He shouted into the comm, wishing someone would answer, but it was too much too hope for. Shepard fell to his knees. They had lost. _He had lost._ To Ceberus, no less. How could he? How could he lose to Ceberus time and time again?

He felt a strong arm hoist him up to his feet. "We have to go, _now._"

"We can't!". He stared at Colburn in the eyes. "We have to save them!"

"This isn't Rannoch, Shepard! There's no fleet, only the Normandy and a shitload of Reapers! Get yourself killed for nothing now or save billions later! Do the math!". Shepard hung his head in defeat. Now the deaths of so many commandoes were on hands, _because he told them to bring him to the temple. _He let Thessia fall, let Ceberus get away with the Prothean data... _You're useless, Shepard! _"Listen! I've got a plan in place already! We have to get outta here! It ain't the time for self-pity!"

_Pull yourself together! _Shepard let himself indulge in three deep breaths, before making a beeline for the Normandy, which was already waiting. "Let's go!". He glanced at Liara, who was running ahead of him.

_I'm so sorry. Forgive me._

**A/N: What would you guys think if I write two ficlets about Colburn's incident with his mentor and Zaeed, which was mentioned last chapter?**


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: We have officially hit twenty one subscribers! Glad to have you two onboard, wejx89 and nothos! (That's Dear Diary x 7!) As usual, remember to rate, comment, and subscribe. Reviews are deeply appreciated.**

-Normandy, comm room-

_Colburn_

"You've gone out of hand, Captain. Did you know that what you pulled off could have serious consequences?"

"_Face it, Admiral. _Humanity's reputation was going to go down anyway, after what Udina did. It was only a matter of _how much._". Colburn took advantage of Hackett's silence. "I'd rather have a politician that traded Red Sand than one who nearly _got the Council killed_."

"It was-"

"_Necessary._ _With all due respect,_ Admiral, you're not even qualified to have this conversation with me now.". Colburn knew he was severely violating regs of insubordination, but he couldn't care less. "_You_ were the one who vouched for _his_ innocence. _You_ weren't even around when all this bullshit was happening! You couldn't even defend a God-damn _fucking_ relay! _Maybe,_ if _you_ were competent enough, the Reapers couldn't have reached Earth! Arcturus station wouldn't have been destroyed! Thousands, including our God-damn Prime Minister wouldn't have died! You're just an incompetent has-been who still thinks he's fucking Christ almighty!"

Hackett's face reddened, though if it was due to anger or shame or embarrassment, Colburn didn't know. "I can just-"

"_De-commission me? _Go ahead! I'm sick of receiving orders from a pencil-pusher who hadn't been on dirtside since eons ago! You just know how to give us jobs, don't you? Like the Alpha relay! Shepard wasn't even supposed to be getting assignments from you! But you just dumped it on him, caused him to get kidnapped by your so-called 'trustworthy friend', forced to destroy a relay, and have the deaths of thousands of Batarians blamed on him while you just act like nothing happened!"

"You have no right-". Colburn severed the connection. He punched the wall, making a small but deep dent. His fist would had probably shattered, if not for the protection of his biotics. Fuck it. Colburn knew that it was childish and illogical to blame Hackett for the Reaper invasion on Earth, as well as incredibly stupid to bite his superior's head off in such a blunt way, but he had momentarily lost his sense of reason. After the little show during the ceremony, Thessia, and Shepard's episodes of self-loathing, Colburn was past his breaking point.

"You really chewed his head off back there.". Colburn turned around to find Tali standing at the doorway. He could almost see the smirk behind her helmet. "You would've been exiled if you were a Quarian."

"Well, I'm not. So that's too bad.". Colburn was a little surprised at Tali's presence. There weren't many opportunities for interactions between the both of them. He was absent during their quest to take back Rannoch, and everyone had immediately prepared for Thessia ever since they left the Citadel. "What brings you here?"

"Samantha told me to check up on you. She said your stress levels were peaking, especially when you came back from Thessia."

"I was expecting you to see Garrus instead. Got pretty banged up by Kai Leng on dirtside."

"Oh...". Colburn sworn he saw Tali blush behind the purple mask. "I've checked up on him already. A few bruises wouldn't kill a Turian. If he could survive a rocket to the face, a few punches sure can't."

"Yeah... Heard about his 'Archangel' vendetta and all that on Omega."

"So... You're not afraid Hackett's going to fire you or something?"

"Nah. He can't. He doesn't exactly have a choice. Not when the Reapers are around anyway."

"True..."

Their conversation was interrupted by EDI's computerised voice. "There is an incoming call from Admiral Anderson."

"Should I leave?", the Quarian queried.

"No you don't need to, but Sam's gonna need your help. I've got a little something planned out, but it's fairly complicated, so I'm sure she'll appreciate the assist from our in-house tech expert."

"You've got it. Keelah se'lai, Colburn."

-CIC-

_Tali_

"Turns out Colburn was right about you needing my help. This decoding is a bosh'tet!"

"Thank God you're around, Tali. I would've died of frustration if you hadn't come to my rescue from this horrible decryption bypass."

"Don't mention it. Besides, I have nothing to do anyway."

"Don't you have a certain Turian to visit?". Tali felt her cheeks burn at the mention of Garrus. _Keelah, does everyone know?_

"Well... Erm...". _Why are you stuttering, you idiot?_

"Relax. I'm kidding! Though I have to say I'm a little surprise you're still not used to our sense of humour even after serving alongside Shepard for so long."

"Well... I kind of lost touch with it, after everything..."

"Oh yes, I forgot, you're the Quarian Ambassador now, aren't you?"

"Yes..."

"And an Admiral!"

"Yeah...". Tali still wasn't comfortable about her new leadership positions, even after all that while. She tried to change the subject. "Hey look!". She pointed a finger at the screen. "Horse Head Nebula, Anadius system..."

"Looks like we hit the jackpot."

-Conference room-

_Kaidan_

Kaidan couldn't believe what he just heard. "So, what? We're just gonna waltz right in and find The Illusive Man?"

"Yep."

"Cole, you do know that's crazy right?"

"I've had better plans, I'll give you that, but so far, this is the only one we've got.". No one said anything after that. "Come on guys, it's not like things can get any worse. Not everyone is gonna make it, I won't lie to you. Hell, I'm ranking our chances of success in this war at thirty percent maximum."

_Thank God Liara ain't here._ "Thanks for the vote of confidence, Mr Pessimist.". Kaidan couldn't hide the sarcasm from his voice. He wasn't used to hearing facts so in-your-face. He much preferred the optimistic Shepard, who sadly, was still pouting in his quarters. The Commander's morale-boosting lines were sometimes illogical and impossible to believe, but it was still nice to hear that at least somebody else was still holding hope.

"A _pessimist,_ is what an _optimist_ calls a _realist,_ Major. I don't like sugar-coating my facts and giving everyone false hope. The Reapers aren't going to spare that kid living down the block from yours just because you knew him."

"So, even if we're going to waltz right in, we need a tactic _at least, right? _". Ashley, always the soldier.

"Well, this is Ceberus headquarters, so EDI's a must... I don't know. Leave it to Shepard I guess..."

"What do you mean _'you guess',_ Cole? _You don't guess._". Kaidan was slightly surprised that Ashley had caught onto the anomaly in Colburn's choice of words. _Guess she knows him better than I thought._

"Because I won't be around."

_"What?",_ the whole crew said at once.

"Anderson called me just now. I'm needed back on Earth.". There was only silence. "Don't look so glum. I've seen it coming long ago. I'm a _Captain,_ not a _Major._ I don't belong here. Not now anyway. Besides, you guys still have Shepard. You'll be fine."

Kaidan glanced at Ashley. But to his surprise, she actually agreed. "He's right. We all have our duties."

"The SSV Artemis is meeting us halfway to pick me up. There's only a couple of hours left, so I suggest we plan this out quickly."

-XO's quarters-

_Colburn_

Colburn had used the last few hours to pack all his belongings and tie up all loose ends -meaning Shepard and Liara- and was laying down on the couch, waiting for Joker to give the boarding call. Ashley hadn't spoke to him. He didn't expect her too. They both knew where the lines were drawn. He closed his eyes, trying to get just that extra bit of rest before fighting Hell back on Earth. There wouldn't be check-ins at the lobby or anything. He didn't even know if there would be a stronghold left at all.

He opened his eyes and sat upright at the mechanical _swoosh_ of the door. "All packed and ready to go?"

He smiled at the brown-eyed soldier standing in front of him. "Why? Am I really so annoying that you want to throw me out of the airlock so soon?"

"That can be arranged.". Ashley sat down beside him. "Joker says we've got about ten minutes until they can get the airlocks connected. The _Artemis'_ spacebridge isn't working or something."

He gave an exaggerated look of paranoia. "Oh my. What if the bridge breaks while I'm walking across?"

"Well, guess you don't have to go back to Earth then.". She kept a nonchalant, almost cheery tone.

"You're such a mean person. I'm heartbroken.". They both laughed, which brought their faces closer. Slowly, they inched towards each other, and their lips touched, softly, before she deepened it. He couldn't help but smile as they broke apart. "You have control issues, you know that?"

"And you know you love it.". She smirked, before closing in again... Before getting interrupted by their favourite pilot. "_Damn it..._". He had to stifle a laugh at her reaction.

"Bridge to Cole, your ride's here."

"Thanks, Joker.", he said, voice intentionally louder than necessary, giving Ashley that devilish grin. He got up and walked over to his footlocker and picked it up. She followed suit.

"Guess this is it huh?"

"Yep. Don't miss me too much.". Ashley punched him in the shoulder. "Hey! No violence!"

And then it was her turn to laugh out loud. "Walk you to the airlock?"

"Promise not to disconnect the spacebridge while I'm still on it?"

"Maybe.", she replied, sliding her hand into his.

"Wouldn't have it any other way."

**A/N: Okay... The Ash/Cole part was hard to get out... *runs off to puke***


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N: Hey guys. What's up. Sorry for the lack of updates. After this chapter, there'll be another short wait, until the real exam is over, and depending on how I juggle with the ridiculous amount of holiday lessons and homework.**

**Another reason for the hiatus, was actually because I've _forgotten_ how to write in English, after so much Chinese. I swear to whoever-is-up-there, the past two weeks of Chinese I did was tenfold of the total of Chinese I did for the past ten years combined. I never study for languages. I don't know how to anyway. I always thought it was more of a 'since young' thing. You can't just take crash course lessons like Math or whatever.**

**Edit: Thanks to Obseesedsniper for the character of Zachary** **Murphy! (iBayne: Considering he doesn't have an account, could you thank him for me through chapter 105's A/N? Thanks. And I apologise for not being able to ask for his permission earlier.)**

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Earth, London-

_Colburn_

"Nice to have you back, Captain.". Anderson shook hands with Colburn.

"Thanks, Admiral."

"I just hope you haven't forgotten how to shoot properly on solid ground after all that space-time.". Anderson began a quick stride towards the back of the base, and beckoned for him to follow. "But, still, I appreciate you coming back. I understand how tough it is to just leave Shepard and the others back there."

"I'm still a soldier, Anderson. I take orders, and I follow them."

"Good enough for me. Come on, let's pick up the pace.". The Admiral gestured for the both of them to quicken their steps. "I have a few guests for you meet."

"I thought I came back to lead the biotic infantry?". _What could he be planning?_

"That's on the field. This is... _Personal._ Come on.". He led him through a door.

Colburn stepped through, to see _two very familiar faces. _"You gotta be kidding me...", he muttered under his breath, in a mixture of disbelief and elation.

"Captain Colburn, meet General-"

"_Tantus Bexcal._". His lips seemed to have a mind of their own as he uncontrollably interrupted his superior.

"_Yes..._". Anderson seemed a little perturbed at the fact that Colburn knew who the Turian General was. "And beside him is-"

"_Zaeed Massani._"

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Normandy, War Room-

_Garrus_

The scene playing in front of the Normandy's resident Turian seemed uncannily similar to the human sport Vega had introduced him to. What was it? Oh right, ping pong. Ashley and Kaidan were issuing orders at each other, like how two opposing players would smack the small round ball as hard as they could, in the hopes that their opponent would fail to catch it.

"Come on, Alenko, you know for a fact that _I_ should be the one going on Cronos Station."

"Not a chance, LC. _I'm_ the superior officer here."

"That's not fair!"

"_Nothing's fair._"

"Enough!". Everyone in the room snapped their heads towards the doorway.

Shepard stood there, in a manner Vakarian had never seen before. The Commander looked haggard, just as the Turian expected. Trapping oneself in his quarters for almost forty eight hours indulging in self-loathing wasn't exactly a strategy for looking good. But Garrus noticed something different. Shepard's eyes were radiant with determination and energy, despite the scruffy look. Exactly what Colburn told Shepard before he left, Garrus had no idea, but whatever it was seemed to have their CO back into action again.

"None of you are going.". Both Alliance officers started to protest. "That's an order!". Biotic and soldier clamped up. "Vakarian, you're with me. We leave in twenty."

Garrus stood up to follow Shepard, but turned his head towards the duo at the entrance, giving them a reassuring glance.

_Don't worry, I've got his back._

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Earth, London-

_Colburn_

"Move it!". Colburn moved to cover behind a barricade. He beckoned for the Biotics under his wing to advance as well. His brief haven of safety was abruptly blown apart by a missile from an Atlas not far away. He too, would've been minced meat, if not for the impressive biotic barrier erected around him by none other than Jason Prangley.

Colburn found another spot to take refuge, and quickly tossed two of his cluster grenades at the gigantic mech. They were followed by a volley of biotic artillery strikes from the Grissom Academy students. Under continuous firepower from the Alliance vanguards and adepts, the Atlas exploded, taking several of the Ceberus troopers in close proximity with it.

"_Fuck it._", he muttered, at the unmistakable hiss of hot air emanating from his Mattock that hinted of overheating. He reached for another heat sink, but his hand came up empty. He scrounged around for an abandoned weapon, and spotted a sniper rifle laying near a fallen Nemesis. _No time to be picky._ He grabbed it and peered through the scope.

Noticing a second Atlas, he fired a round at its distinctive yellow canopy. The glass of the cockpit cracked, but the bullet failed to penetrate. Cursing, he squeezed the trigger again. This time, the shot managed to puncture through, but narrowly missed the pilot. _Damn it._

Colburn struggled to remember what Tantus had taught him more than a decade ago. He slowly counted. _One, two... _He held his breath, and fired again. His aim had been true: the shot had hit the trooper residing in the mech, but it hit his throat instead of the headshot he had been wishing for. It _would have to do._ Sniping was something he had detested during his tutelage under Tantus and Zaeed, and he had given up on it ever since he was enlisted.

"Captain, you've got more Ceberus reinforcements headed your way! Watch your flanks!", Major Coats' voice buzzed in his earpiece. Colburn brought up the map on his HUD. They were already pinned by the Ceberus forces from the north. If they were to fend off even more from the left...

"No go, Major! Requesting backup!", he shouted as he sent off a shockwave in the direction of a trio of Centurions.

"Negative. We're spread too thin already. We don't have manpower to spare.". _Fuck this. _Colburn resisted the urge to command everyone to retreat. They had to defend the area, or else their stronghold would be overrun soon enough. An adept shooting beside him suddenly collapsed to the ground, left hand clutching at his abdomen. Colburn took down the trooper responsible, then knelt down by the side of the soldier.

"I... I'm fine, sir...". He tried to lift himself off the ground with his assault rifle, but instead, it clattered onto the ground.

"Stay down, Murphy! We don't need gung-ho martyers.". Colburn brought up his Omni-tool, and soon after, a surge of relief surfaced on the Murphy's face at the application of medi-gel. "Jackson, get over here! Find him someplace safer!"

"Aye aye!". Another marine soon dragged the injured adept elsewhere.

Colburn looked around. The situation at hand was grim. The biotic students, no matter how talented they were, couldn't hold out much longer. They had only one Jason Prangley. The biotic infantry, on the other hand, were also running out of steam. Gunning and hurling endless shockwaves were evidently too much for them to handle.

_Little did he know his luck was changing._

A familiar accent greeted him through his earpiece. "Hold on to your panties, cupcakes. Your knights in shining armour are coming in!". There was a burst of gunfire from their left, and out came his favourite merc and his band of buddies. "What in the bloody hell are you doing? Get back! We've got this!", Zaeed hollered.

_Time to move. _"Move back! I repeat: retreat!". Slowly, the Alliance company backtracked, firing rounds after rounds as they moved a step backwards. "Thanks, Zaeed. You saved our asses.", Colburn spoke through the comm.

"Damn straight I did, son. Get back to Tantus. We'll show these bastards what happens when you mess with Massani."

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

Afterwards, things were smooth-sailing, _or as much as they possibly could be anyway. _Their forces were retreating while Zaeed's took over, the veterans punching through the enemy lines as if they were paper. Jackson and another vanguard were carrying Murphy, rushing towards the stronghold, while the Grissom students were only lagging behind by a few steps. "Keep on it! We're almost-"

An ear-piercing scream burst through the air.

Colburn spun 'round, _to find a Phantom standing over the fallen body of a familiar brunette, sword bloodied._

**A/N: Well, hope that's good enough for you guys. It's most probably substandard, but do forgive me. I haven't written anything in English for quite awhile.**

**Ps: I've already changed Hutcherson's title from 'General' to 'Rear Admiral' for past chapters. I just couldn't stand it.**


	33. Chapter 33

**A/N: My exam is over! Yay! Though the thought of competing with hundreds of thousands of other students across the country isn't exactly a happy thought. Speaking of the O levels, I had this really creepy thought. What if, after the O levels in mid-November, the plane flying our papers from Singapore all the way to those Cambridge professors in Britain, suddenly crashes into the sea? :o What if it flew into the Bermuda Triangle and never to be seen again? Double :o That's a really scary thought. If I have to go through Hell again, maybe it's easier to just jump down from my bedroom window, though I'll probably just earn a month's rest confined to a hospital bed, since my apartment's on the third floor. -.- Let's just pray it doesn't happen...**

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Earth, London-

_Colburn_

_God, no. Don't do this to me. _He stared at helplessly as the medics rushed Lea into the base's makeshift medical centre. He ran to the nearest wall and punched it as hard as he could. He hoped the pain would momentarily distract him from the overwhelming frustration. He kept hitting the wall, trying to make a dent through the steel and concrete, or until every bone in his fingers broke. _Of course it didn't work._ "Fucking gauntlet.", he growled.

"It's- it's my fault, isn't it? I should've been me... Yeah, it shouldn't have been her... Me... It's my fault... Yeah...". Colburn turned, to find Jason Prangley muttering to himself. Another Grissom student _-Cassandra, was it?- _was by his side, trying to assure him that it wasn't his fault. You gotta be fucking kidding me.

The first instinct Colburn had was to bite his head off. Prangley was supposed to _protect_ her. And he _failed._ Now she was fighting for her life, _while he lived to walk and whine. _

He was angry, fuming, frustrated, irritated.

_And useless._

_It's not his fault, you fucking retarded. __You__ were supposed to protect her too! _He decided to just leave and return to his bunk. He couldn't quite trust himself to _not_ do anything stupid.

He had barely gotten ten steps, when someone placed a hand on his shoulder. _What now? _He grabbed the hand off his shoulder, and spun, trying to armlock whoever it was. Little did he know that the other person had some moves of his own. Colburn soon found himself tackled onto the ground. "_Relax. It's me_.". He stopped struggling, and looked up to find a certain Turian face staring right back at him.

"_Tantus._"

"So, it seems you haven't gone crazy enough to forget about me.". The Turian lifted him up to his feet.

"Yeah, in case you didn't get the memo, I'm not exactly in a good mood right now."

"Just saying.". Tantus chuckled for a bit, but soon adopted a more serious tone. "How are you?"

"Very well.", Colburn replied, sarcasm evident.

His mentor seemed to muse at the reply. "Follow me."

Colburn was officially on the verge of exploding, but still kept his tone relatively neutral. Angry or not, this was someone he respected, _and should be respected. _"Look, Tantus-"

"That's an order, son. Come on.". He led Colburn to one of the areas that the human had never went to. It was specifically reserved for officers of the highest ranks. The Turian brought him inside a bunker, which housed only a single bed, an overview map of the area, and two crates of alcohol. Colburn recognised one being Turian brandy, and the other being levo liquor.

"What the-"

"Sit down.". Tantus made himself comfortable on the ground, and gestured for his protege to do the same. And so he did, considering there wasn't any other furniture in the small quarters. The Turian tossed him him a bottle of levo beer, and grabbed a bottle of dextro brandy for himself as well. Without saying a word, the both of them unscrewed their drinks and knocked back their heads. "Better?"

"Maybe."

"Come on, cupcake. Cheer up."

Colburn took another gulp. "Tantus, what exactly do you want?"

"To drink.", Tantus replied, as if the answer was obvious. "I took you under my wing. I know how you think.". Colburn didn't respond. "If there's anything I've rubbed off on you, it's the way we deal with things."

"Yeah sure. Thanks for turning me into an alcoholic."

"When was the last time you got drunk?". Colburn scowled at the seemingly irrelevant question. "Answer me."

_Damn. When was it? _"Two years? Three? Four? Not sure."

"My point exactly! See? Now you've got a seasoned liver. So when you start going woozy, you know someone messed your drink."

"We're not supposed to drink, are we?"

"You've got a Spectre backing you up. You'll be fine."

_Yeah, maybe._

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Normandy, Comm room-

_Shepard_

"So, basically, you just went to Eden Prime, and got yourself a real, _living_ Prothean, who's having hygiene problems and needs to wash his hands once every five minutes?"

"Yeah, I guess...", Shepard admitted, quite shamefully, as though he was a young little boy confessing to his mom that he ate all of the apple pie.

"And possibly a psychopathic, arrogant son of bitch who keeps complaining how backwards we are."

"He has a point..."

"Wow, and you're still defending him? Point or no point, Shep, you _don't_ say those things to someone _who just saved your ass_. Besides, it's been, _what?_ Fifty thousand years? They're all gone already. It doesn't matter how 'advanced' the Protheans were. They're gone, and it doesn't mean shit now. If they were so good, _they_ would've been able to stop the Reapers and end the cycle, and not leave it to _us_ to clean up after them."

"Play nice, Cole. He's the only one left from his race. It's natural he misses them. Besides, you've seen how they turned his people into the Collectors..."

"Oh, so we're supposed to tolerate him?". The vanguard scoffed. "He isn't the only one! Batarians, Asari, Rachni, Krogan, Turian, Humans... Almost _every_ race has been Reaperised. _Hell,_ are we all supposed to go all self-important then?"

Shepard was at a loss for words. Colburn's reaction was very different from the others who have heard of Javik. All of them were excited at the prospect of having a living Prothean as an ally. _Most of them anyway. _

Shepard studied the features on his XO's face. Something was clearly bothering him. "You okay, Cole? You don't look so good."

"I'm fine.". _Guess that's a 'no'._

"Do you want me to ask nicely, or should I get Ash over here?"

"_It's fine._ Just get here quick, Shepard. Things don't look so good over here."

"Just hang on for a bit. We're already on our way."

"Then go faster. I don't think we can hold out for long."

**A/N: Just a question - is anyone still reading this? Or has everybody removed it from their subscription box? Am I just typing to an imaginary audience?**


	34. Chapter 34

**A/N: Holy shit! You guys know about the Blasto gag right? I found a video on the whole actual movie! It's watchable somewhere on the Citadel in ME3, but I can't seem to find it. Here's the link! :D I swear to God, if this ain't funny, I'll quit writing for the rest of my life. http:/youtube(dot)com/watch?v=NW4R606ldQQ**

**Ps: Hey, we still have two readers who survived my horrible writing! *high-five***

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Earth, London-

_Colburn_

"Alright, people. We've got to hold our ground until Shepard gets here with reinforcements. Right now, we have Reaper forces to the north and east, right across No Man's Land, and Ceberus to the south and west.", Anderson said as he pointed a finger towards the map on the table. "The north's especially vulnerable, so I need those vanguards at the frontlines. Captain, I don't care what you do, just punch a damn hole through their formation. Major, get a group and a few Makos and fend off those troopers at our west. The rest will go as planned. Understood?"

"Aye aye!"

Colburn was preparing to leave, when Anderson called for him. "Colburn, stay here for a minute."

He looked at the Admiral apprehensively. "What's up?"

"We have someone for you to meet.", Coats said. Major and Admiral shared a knowing look, and led the Captain to an LZ. _Great, wonder who's it this time._

"The shuttle should be here anytime soon.", Coats murmured.

"You guys mind telling me who our VIP is?"

"Someone who could possibly turn the tide of this battle.", Anderson deadpanned.

True enough, a distinctive blue Kodiak landed in front of them in about three minutes. The doors opened to reveal... "Finally. Let's go kick some Ceberus ass. I could use the exercise after that fucking long ride.". _Subject Zero._ The blue aura of biotics flickered around her arms, and Colburn knew at first glance that the power she activated was already enough to rip ten Atlases, though he sensed that it was probably less than ten percent of her full potential.

What was possibly Humanity's most powerful biotic scanned the Captain from head to toe. She gave a smirk. "Heard you worked for the King of the Boy Scouts."

Colburn turned towards Anderson. "You sure about this?"

"We're short of manpower. We're taking in anything and anyone that can hold a gun. Someone with a grudge against Ceberus? And doesn't get sick of ripping people apart? Even better.". _Guess I can't argue with that._

"You pussies gonna stop wanking or what? What the fuck are we waiting for?"

"Follow me.". Major Coats gestured for Jack to follow him, leaving Admiral and Captain alone.

"Anderson, there's something you're not telling me.". It wasn't even a question, but rather a statement.

"Look son, I've heard news."

"What news?"

"Your father's here."

Colburn smirked at the 'revelation'. _That's it? Damn. That's kinda anti-climactic._ "I can't think of anywhere else he'd be."

Anderson's eyes widened at Colburn's indifference. "You know where he is?"

"No.". He paused to muse at Anderson's perplexed expression. "I just know that he wouldn't be stupid enough to stay on Cronos."

"You're not worried that Subject Zero's going to take out those troops in the south?"

"Are you trying to say that I should be _worried_ for _his_ safety?"

"I figured you'd want to bring him in alive, interrogate him."

Colburn scoffed at the thought. "He's below my paygrade, Anderson. Well, if he isn't there when Zero's there, good for him. If he is... Well... All the better."

"You sure? I can still deploy her somewhere else."

"Come on, Anderson. We've got Reapers to kill."

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Normandy, hangar-

_Shepard_

They were all in their combat armour, fingers tightly gripping their guns, biotics at the ready. _This is it. _They were only five minutes to Earth, when they would leave the safety of their beloved frigate, and dive straight into Hell.

"People.". They all looked up towards their Commander at the sound of his voice. "We've come a long way.". He paused, thinking of what to say.

"We've experienced loss, sacrifice, the deaths of loved ones.". He locked eyes with Ashley, and then let his eyes drift to Liara, afterwards glancing at Garrus, before resting them on Kaidan. Out of his eye, he saw Javik give a small nod.

"But,", he continued, adopting a lighter tone. "We have also grown.", he said, eyeing Vega at the same time.

"As well as regain what we have lost.". Shepard flashed a smile at Tali.

"We did the impossible.". Shepard remembered the moment when they had successfully cured the Genophage. _Mordin and Wrex would be proud._

"Most importantly, we survived the odds. When they said that we would fail, we proved them wrong. Today, we will do the same. The Reapers will fall! And those who have fallen will bless us!"

"Hell yeah!"

"Damn straight we will!"

"We'll show the Reapers what we're made of!"

The hangar soon erupted into a huge cheering party, before it culminated into an unanimous "Hoorah!"

Joker's voice cut through the noise over the comm. "Light is green, guys! Good luck!"

The previous silence soon took over again as everyone climbed into their respective shuttles. Shepard made himself comfortable at the cockpit. For what could possibly the final time, he turned on the comm again.

"Godspeed, my brave soldiers! Make 'em proud!"

**A/N: I know this is kinda short, but... Forgive me? *gives puppy-dog eyes***


	35. Chapter 35

**A/N: Lo and behold! First of all, I want to thank this story's twelfth subscriber, DarkReaver724 for adding it to his/her favourite list. That's right, I haven't forgotten those who subscribed during the earlier stages of this story. Again, let me say how grateful I am for the support each 21 of you have shown. I love you guys.**

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Earth, London-

_Colburn_

"Anderson, this is Colburn. We've pushed them back, but I don't think they're gonna stay back for long. Orders?". Colburn panted slightly. The Reaper resistance had been anything but weak. They had managed to suppress the enemy lines temporarily, but his men were clearly worn out.

"Hold on tight. You've got reinforcements on your way. Once they reach, you guys pull back and get some rest."

"Aye aye.". Colburn glanced around him. The soldiers were still scanning their surroundings vigilantly, on the lookout for hostiles, but their body posture couldn't hide the exhaustion evident beneath their helmets. "Tell them to hurry up though. I don't think we can hold off another wave."

"Alenko and Tali'Zorah are on their way. You just need to hold the fort for a little while."

True to Anderson's words, they were approached by a small group of five shuttles. One of them opened to reveal two familiar figures. The three of them nodded towards each other in acknowledgment.

"Nice to see you're still alive, Colburn."

"Ditto, Tali."

"Sorry for running late. Had a, uh, VIP to extract.". Kaidan gave him a mischievous smirk.

He shook hands with Kaidan. "Yeah. Heard about your little escapade to Eden Prime. Not what we were all expecting, is he?"

"Give him a little credit, Cole. At least he didn't tear Shepard apart on sight."

"Excuse me, gentlemen, but I don't think this is the time to catch up.". Both men gave the Quarian a mock salute. _Yes ma'am,_ they mouthed. Colburn swore he sensed her roll her eyes behind her helmet. "Bosh'tets...", she muttered. "You guys must be tired after all that. Anderson-"

"Yeah, I know. Keep safe, you two.". Colburn turned around to his vanguards and adepts. "Come on, guys! To the shuttles! Chop chop!"

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Base camp-

_Liara_

_Goddess..._ "How bad was it when you left?"

"_Very._", came Ashley's short and curt reply.

Liara opened her mouth to reply, when something, _or rather __someone,_ caught her eye. "Nice to see you, ladies. Just in time for the party.". There was absolutely no hint of humour in his voice.

"I...". Liara trailed off, not knowing how to reply.

Colburn suddenly looked embarrassed. "Sorry... I- it's just that a lot's happened recently."

Ashley softly smirked. "No shit, Sherlock.". Secretly, Liara was slightly appalled at the way the couple interacted with each other. There was no _I'm sorry,_ or even the subtlest of displays of affection in public. But she also knew these two understood and cared for each other more than they would ever show to others. Liara was impressed at their ability of remaining strictly professional. As much as she was the Shadow Broker, such a manner of formality had never been achieved between her and Kaidan.

Liara studied his face closely. _Goddess, how long has it been since he stopped to take a break? _"It's alright, Colburn. I understand."

Their conversation was quickly interrupted. "Lieutenant Commander, Doctor T'Soni, you're needed.", came Anderson's voice.

"Well, guess that's our cue.", Ashley prompted.

Colburn gave them a small nod. "Better get going. Excuse me.". The Captain made his way towards what Liara assumed to be the base's medical centre. _He doesn't look to be injured..._

"Come on, Liara. Don't want to keep Anderson waiting.". Together, both women made their way towards Anderson's station.

"Are you not worried about him?", Liara asked.

"Who? Colburn? All he needs is time to cope. He'll be fine.". They continued their journey in silence, passing by Urdnot Wreav along the way, who was giving a speech to his Krogan warriors.

"Anderson.". Ashley saluted the Admiral.

"Good to see you. Now let's get straight to business.". He gestured for them to follow him to a table, where a holographic map was. "I believe you know a Steve Cortez?"

"Yeah, he was our pilot on the Normandy. Why?". Anderson didn't reply Ashley, opting to play an audio file in response instead.

_"Mayday! This is Lieutenant Steve Cortez! I repeat: mayday!"_

"Christ..."

"I believe you two know what to do."

**A/N: Yes, I'm scattering the squad in vastly different pairs. This is to avoid the cliche "couple fights alongside each other" syndrome, where their attention is taken up by the constant looking out of their, well, you know. Besides, I think it adds a nice touch of realism. I mean, if I were Shepard, that's what I would've done anyway. I certainly want my squad's eyes watching my six instead of each other.**

**Ps: I know I said Jack didn't exist in the earlier chapters, but I decided to add her anyway. What would a fight with Ceberus be without their biggest and most badass hater?**

**Pps: I've made Ceberus join in the fray as well. I mean, the Illusive Man is still alive, and I highly doubt he'd stationed all his troops on Cronos. He's a lot of things, but stupid ain't one of them.**


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N: Mind telling me what you guys think of it so far? Do you feel that I'm missing anything?**

-Crash zone-

_Ashley_

"Come on. He shouldn't be far...". Ashley looked at the holographic map on her Omni-tool. _Yeah, definitely. _"Cortez? You there?", she shouted.

"I hope he isn't pinned under those rubble...". As if on cue, a groan was heard almost immediately after Liara finished her sentence. "Did you hear that?"

Ashley strained her ears. It was faint, but undoubtedly present. "Move out! I want you guys searching under every slab of concrete!". The group of ten got to work quickly, searching for their fallen flight lieutenant.

"Over here!", one of the marines shouted. Everyone rushed to his location, where a moaning Cortez lay, pinned down under a fortunately not-too-huge piece of debris. A reddish trail of blood was slowly dripping from his scalp. After a few tries, the team managed to lift the concrete of Cortez, and successfully get him out.

Liara quickly came forth, medi-gel at the ready. "There...", she soothed. "Better?"

"_Much..._", he mumbled in return.

_At least he's safe now. _"Come on. Let's get him back to base."

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Base camp-

_Ashley_

As soon as the shuttle touched down, Cortez was escorted straight to the base's medical centre. Seeing that there was nothing else to do, Ashley followed suit, while the Asari went to Anderson. Doctor Chloe Michel had let out a gasp as soon as she saw the flight lieutenant. "Quick! Get him over here!"

_Oh well. _Ashley turned to leave, but her eye was caught by a familiar figure. _Colburn?_ The vanguard sat on a chair, back hunched forward, beside a bed ward. As she approached, the weariness was increasingly obvious in the man's body posture.

He jerked around as soon as she placed a hand on his shoulder. "Hey.", he said, voice emotionless just like before.

On closer inspection, Ashley saw the dark stubble on his usually clean-shaven face. His hair was even more rowdy than before. Ashley thought she saw a few strands of silver among the sea of chocolate-brown. Colburn's eyes lacked the usual energy, instead now looking dull, like the embers of a weak, dying flame, threatening to be extinguished by a sudden blow of the wind.

"God... You look like...". _Death._

"Yeah. So I've heard."

She remembered their previous brief conversation, shortly before their mission to rescue Cortez. _That was, what? Three hours ago? _The last she heard, Colburn had been on the battlefield for the at least ten hours. _That's thirteen hours, __at least._ Her eyes drifted over to the body on the bed. Her eyes widened at the sight of Lea Rodriguez.

"When did she-"

"Fours days.". _Four days? Wasn't that before her vid-call to him on Earth?_

"And you didn't tell me? Shepard? _Anyone? _", she snapped.

"Would it help if I did?". Again, his tone was flat. Colburn turned his attention back to the unconscious brunette.

"Does Samantha-"

"No.". _Should've known._ Colburn started speaking, though Ashley wasn't sure if it was to himself or her. "I can't lose her. Not again... Can't let history repeat itself..."

Unsure of what was best, she knelt down beside him, and forced him to look at her in the eyes. "Pull yourself together, soldier.". She paused for a bit. "You look like crap. Is that how you go to battle? Those men out there, they deserve better than having a screwed-up head!". Afterwards, Ashley adopted a softer tone, but it was still firm. "Go freshen up, grab some chow, then catch some sleep."

He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath. "Yeah, okay.". He got up, and headed for the door, but stopped short at the entrance. Colburn turned around. "Thanks... I needed the reality check."

"Always.". She shot him a grin. "Sleep tight.". He gave her a smile of his own, though this one was obviously half-hearted.

_Guess that's better than nothing._

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Aboard the shuttle, en route to base camp-

_Vega_

"What about lieutenant Steve Cortez?", Shepard queried. "Did he make it?"

"He did. Ashley and Doctor T'Soni got him out of the crash. He's receiving medical treatment as we speak.", Anderson replied.

_Thank God Esteban's alright. _"Given all the shit he's been through, Loco, Esteban ain't going down from a puny crash by those fuckers."

"Let's hope you're right, LT."

After riding in silence for another ten minutes, the Commander spoke again. "How's the overall situation, Anderson?"

"Bad, but it got better ever since you came, especially after you took out those guns. Colburn's been wiping out the resistance concentrating between us and the beam. Let's just hope his efforts don't go to waste. With luck, we'll be able to cross No Man's Land without much of a fight."

_Guess it ain't so pretty after all. _"Well, we've done crazier things. Hell, we even destroyed a Rachni nest. No reason why we should stop doing it now."

"I hope so too, James."

"Proceed with caution. It is arrogance and overconfidence that caused the downfall of my race.". _Oh great, now the Prothean troll has something to say._

"Sometimes all we need is that little bit of hope, Javik."

"We will see, Commander.". _Ass._

"We're reaching in five minutes.", Anderson announced.

_Well, let's get cracking._

**A/N: Well, time for bed! It's 12.30am when I'm typing this now. Lol.**

**Ps: You guys downloaded the Rebellion Pack yet? It's awesome!**


	37. Chapter 37

**A/N: Canadians are awesome. Any Canadian readers/subscribers out there?**

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-Base camp-

_Shepard_

"Comrades...", he started. "We have come a long way. From being total strangers, to forging a friendship, a bond that can never be broken or destroyed. This alone, is a victory against the Reapers.".

Shepard scanned his eyes across the view in front of him, where each and every member of his squad stood, eyes burning with that defiant flame. "We have all been though thick and thin together. From aboard the first Normandy, to the Collector base, the curing of the Genophage, taking back Rannoch... Of course, there were also losses.". Like Wrex, Mordin, Thane, Legion, Jenkins.

"But ultimately, we have all grown. Let their sacrifices mean something. We give those machines nothing less than our very best! Don't dwell on those we couldn't save, but rather, focus on those that we can protect. _Every mother, every son, every unborn child. _Just think of the safe and peaceful lives they'll live in, a future that would never be threatened by the Reapers!". Everyone seemed to straighten up at his words.

"The road will be long, the battle will be tough, but no one said it was going to be a walk in the park. You're all in the military! So suck it up, and give nothing less than your very best! Be fearless."

He started to quote a particular poem a particular someone had taught him.

_"Out of the night that covers me,_

_Black as the pit from pole to pole,_

_I thank whatever Gods may be,_

_For my unconquerable soul."_

Ashley smiled a little at his recitation. He continued on.

_"In the fell clutch of circumstance,_

_I have not winced nor cried aloud._

_Under the bludgeonings of Chance,_

_My head is bloodied, but unbowed."_

Her smile grew wider. He let her quote the third stanza.

_"Beyond this place of wrath and tears,_

_Looms but the horror of the shade._

_And yet the menace of the years,_

_Finds and shall find me unafraid."_

Little did he know, Kaidan joined in, so did Garrus and Tali.

_"It matters not how strait the gate,_

_How charged with punishments the scroll,_

_I am the master of my fate,_

_The captain of my soul."_

They can throw everything at us, shoot at us with their beams, send send waves after waves of husks. We'll stumble, limp, get battered mercilessly, but know this: we'll remain standing! Victory of failure, we're all on our own two feet!". He gave them a smile this time. "I know you'll make me proud, and I thank you, on behalf of the future generations you now fight so hard for."

He hoped his speech was good enough to make them forget about the most important of things. _He was wrong. _"Hold on, Shepard, who's going with you?"

He tried to purge all doubts and hesitation from his voice. "_Nobody._"

"What?"s traveled throughout the room. "You can't do that!", they all said.

He tried to calm them down. "Relax! I have Anderson and Major Coats with me, along with those Makos and a whole battalion. With covering fire from Joker and EDI, we'll be fine."

"Come on, Loco-"

"Shepard-"

"Commander, you can't-"

_Time to go renegade._ "I can! As of now, I call the shots here! You all have your respective duties, so go! That's an order!"

Reluctantly, they grumbled as they filed out, in a futile attempt to make Shepard change his mind. Soon, only two men were left to themselves.

"I hope you know what you're doing, Shep.". Colburn was expressionless, tone bland.

"Are you going to talk me out of it?"

"No."

"Then why are you still here?"

"To do the only thing I can - wish you luck."

Shepard tried to imitate his favourite Krogan. "Heh, who needs luck when you have ammo?", he claimed in a gruff voice.

"You'll need it all, Commander. _All of it._ Just don't make us get your sorry ass out of there like Cortez. Only makes our job worse at it is."

Shepard grinned at his XO. "_Copy that._"

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_Colburn_

"Please tell me you made him change his mind."

He kept his voice to sound oblivious to her statement. "Hey, Ash."

"Answer me, damn it."

He decided to play coy. "Whoever told you I stayed back to dissuade him?". His voice if not arrogant, was surely tempting enough for her to punch him in the face. To her credit, she didn't.

"Then what the hell did you say to him in there?"

"I wished him luck.", he replied nonchalantly.

"Are you mad? He's going to get ripped out there!"

He shoved her forward, making her face only inches from his. "Listen to me, _Williams,_ I know you guys can't lose-"

"Damn straight we can't! And you don't know _anything._ You weren't even _there_ when the SR1 got shredded by the damn Collectors. You've never _seen_ him suffocate in space right in front of your eyes while you're in a escape pod! You were _never_ part of the old crew. Don't you _dare_ think you know him better than us."

Each sentence was like a stinging slap to the face, _but only because they were true. _Colburn faltered slightly, but he didn't show it. Instead, he made himself sound more confident than ever. "Maybe you do know him better than me, so show it! Put your money where your mouth is. Because if you _really_ understand him, you'll know better than to go against him.", he taunted. She didn't reply.

"Think it about it, _Ash._", he said, this time much calmer, before walking off.

**A/N: Don't know about you guys, but I liked that lowblow, a lot. I mean, it's kinda normal for someone like Ash to just say everything out loud in an argument to win. And also, I thought it'd be more interesting to write an argument instead of those sappy farewell conversations or something. I told you I wasn't a romance person.**

**Ps: I just realised I'm such a meanie towards Cole. Lol. I keep getting bad stuff to happen to him.**

**Pps: Oops, forgot to add this in - the poem is called Invictus, by Henley. If any of you find it familiar, it's the one Ashley recited to Shepard at Huerta.**


	38. Chapter 38

**A/N: I don't know why, but the temptation to have Cole and Ash break up after all of this is... Hard to resist, to say the least...**

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_Joker_

"SSV Normandy, this Anderson. When Hammer goes on the assault to the beam, I want you staying back, but watching. Keep an eye out for anything and everything."

"This is SSV Normandy, we read you loud and clear. Aye aye, Admiral.". _Well, guess this is it._ He'd briefly considered playing _'Stayin' Alive' _over the ship's comm, but decide against it at the end. He preferred to be killed by an oncoming Reaper beam rather than have a group of very annoyed and irritated crew members storming up the bridge.

His short, momentary reverie of nonsensical situations was quickly broken at the screams and hails over Hammer team's comm chatter. "Holy shit, we've got a Reaper over here!", he heard a marine shout. One glance was all it took for Joker to recognise what it was. _Harbinger._

"Push forward! We can't retreat! Move, move!", Anderson ordered.

Joker temporarily lost the ability to react as the entire strike team, be it air support or ground troops, got decimated within seconds. He thought he caught a glimpse of Shepard's bright pinkish-red tech armour moving towards the beam, only to be obscured under a ton of rubble. _No..._ His mind flashbacked to three years ago, when Shepard had sacrificed himself to save him aboard the SR1. _Shepard can't die... He-_

His thoughts were disrupted when the SR2 suddenly did a full flip. "Joker!". Only then did the pilot realise he had been sitting like a rock at his seat, which also meant that the Normandy had been floating like a sitting duck. It would've been shredded to pieces by Harbinger's laser if not for EDI. "Joker, _what the hell are you doing? _", Garrus yelled over the comm.

It hit him that his daydreaming had almost cost all of them to die. No. No one dies. He piped up over the comm. "Alright, people! We got a Reaper to take down! Taking evasive manoeuvres!". He set the frigate's thrusters to maximum, and soon, they were circling the Reaper, skirting around its powerful beams. _Time to go on the offensive._ "Come on, Vakarian! Don't tell me those calibrations were useless."

"Heh. Don't worry about that. These Thanix cannons can do a fuckton of damage. Watch!". The Normandy fired, but to no avail. The Reaper could probably stand ten Collector beams at once.

_It was going to be a long fight._

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_Colburn_

"Hammer is down! I repeat, Hammer is down!". _What?_

"Coats, what are you talking about?"

"Hammer... It's gone! All of it! We have no choice, we're pulling back!"

"What about Shepard? Anderson?"

"Negative. I doubt anyone on the ground survived. All our shuttles were taken out within two minutes."

_Fuck it! _Tossing his overheated rifle on the ground, Colburn started to sprint. "This is Colburn. I'm heading towards the beam!"

"Are you crazy? Get back here!", Ashley demanded over the comm.

"What are you gonna do? Bite me?". _Come on, just two clicks to go._

"Cole, we all want to save Shepard, but you have to wait for backup! That place must be crawling with Reaper forces right now!", Ashley spoke breathlessly. _That means she's running too._

Now he was getting irritated. "Don't you get it? The Crucible! If Shepard didn't make it, we'll lose this war! I'm going there to activate it!"

"Wait-", he disconnected the link.

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_Colburn_

_Damn it. _The situation was worse than he had imagined. Chunks of concrete were all about, creating mini mountains. God knew how many soldiers were crushed and buried underneath it all. Smoking, charred shuttles were laying about everywhere. More often than not, they were in the form of broken bits and pieces, the insignia of the Alliance impossible to see. Oddly enough, the whole place was deserted, with no signs of movement.

_Crunch._ The sound of boots on gravel from behind got his attention. Slowly, his hand inched towards the pistol on his left hip. "Don't even think about it.". His eyes widened at the voice behind him, along with the unmistakable sound of a pistol unfolding, as he raised his hands up.. "That's a good boy."

Colburn tried to summon his biotics, but they couldn't seem to activate. _Fucking dampeners. Guess there's only one way left._ Immediately, he activated his Omni-blades, and slashed wildly behind him. He'd managed to disarm his opponent, and would've killed him, had he not backstepped in the nick of time.

The vanguard soon found himself staring at his father, or rather, the cybermetically fused and enhanced Greg Hutcherson. _"What the hell have you done to yourself?". _For the first time in a long while, Colburn found himself speechless. The question wasn't anything more than a mere mutter.

Hutcherson laughed loudly, which sounded more like a rumble of thunder, in actual fact. "I may have, well, gotten a few upgrades for myself.", he mused.

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_Ashley_

"Can't this thing go any faster? Damn it!"

"We're going as fast as we can, ma'am. The Mako isn't built for speed."

"I know, marine..."

Ashley was frustrated. _Very_ frustrated. Nothing ever seemed to go smoothly since they arrived on Earth. Joker and Garrus, along with the rest of the crew, were on the SR2, fighting off Harbinger. Colburn had ran off to the beam, _alone._ Chakwas was complaining about the lack of meds and beds at the medical centre. And now, both Shepard _and_ Anderson were nowhere to be seen. All those defences, decoys they had so painstakingly set up so that Hammer could succeed, went down the drain in minutes.

"Ashley, you might want to hear this..."

She turned her head towards Liara. "What is it?"

The Asari linked Ashley's comm frequency to whatever was playing on her Omni-tool.

"You're not human anymore...". _It was Colburn's._

"And you think of that as a bad thing?". The second voice sent a small shiver down her spine. It was Greg Hutcherson's, except not quite as human. "Yes, this isn't exactly pleasant to look at, but it's a small price to pay for eternal life. Oh, have I introduced you to the perks?"

There was the sound of something, or rather, _someone,_ being slammed against a hunk of metal. She heard Colburn start to breathe heavily. _"Biotics.",_ the menace declared. "You should be familiar with them, shouldn't you? How's it like, being on the receiving end?"

Meanwhile, the outline of a human's body on the screen of Liara's Omni-tool, labelled with the Captain's name, started to flash red around the torso. _God..._ Both women stared silently with each other.

_Bam!_ That dreadful noise came through the comm again. This time, the area of red flashed even more urgently.

_"Come on, son. I think it's time we did some relationship bonding."_

**A/N: Well, there ya go. Actually, I'm thinking of killing quite a few characters for the ending. I won't lie to you, Ash, Cole and a lot of others are on that list, though not together. For example, if I really do kill Ash, Colburn's probably gonna live. I always like my stories to end with a bit of tragedy.**

**Ps: I wasn't lying about breaking the both of them up.**


	39. Chapter 39

**A/N: Here's a few updates for you guys. One, I've changed my avatar to Shepard's face. Yes, that's the face of our very blonde and eligible bachelor in this story. Now can you guys visualise him? A lot of people say they stick to Sheploo because there aren't any good custom Shepards out there. Says who? Mine looks awesomely handsome! Leave your thoughts about my Shep in a review!**

**Two, there's this new image manager thing on the site, which allegedly acts as somesort of book cover. I still haven't figured it out yet.**

**Three, as you can see, my Shepard has a full paragon bar, and the renegade one is about half full. That's where I got the basis for Colburn's character. I needed somesort of a neutral guy.**

**Four, I am extremely distraught and saddened by the lack of reviews. I used to have at least one every chapter. :(**

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_Colburn_

Things were not going well. Inside his armour, Colburn was literally swimming in a sea of meds and painkillers. Medi-gel would've been preferred, but it was only used for external, superficial injuries. _Broken ribs weren't one of them._

Fortunately, or rather, unfortunately, the meds were the only thing preventing him from passing out due to the intense pain. But that didn't mean it didn't hurt.

"I thought you liked to fight back.", Hutcherson taunted. The bastard was literally tossing him around like a ragdoll, flinging him up and down, slamming him against the ground and whatever was in proximity.

_Fuck you, _he tried to rebut, but it came out as somesort of a groan instead. As Hutcherson hoisted him off the ground by the throat, Colburn took the opportunity to shoot him a defiant glare, daring him to just end his life right now and then.

His father merely smiled at him. "I'd everything planned for you, right from the start. Your future, _education, career, eventual marriage, everything. _You were supposed to have a bright future. It was supposed to be just us two, _father and son, _running an empire of our own!"

"You've lost it...", Colburn managed to croak, despite the intense grip around his neck.

His smile soon turned into a snarl, tone becoming venomous and vicious. "But you just have to run off with that good-for-nothing Spectre! And what have you gained from sticking with him? _Money? Power? Nothing! _"

And then, his face transformed into genuine disappointment. Colburn almost felt apologetic, wishing to return and be his father's son. _Snap out of it! He's influencing you!_ "But alas, that is the bitter truth.". He shook his head slowly in disapproval. "_After everything I've done for you, everything I've given you..._". He sighed. "Goodbye, Miles."

The grip on Colburn's neck tightened drastically, breaking off his supply of oxygen. Colburn's eyes widened in response, hands clawing weakly at his arm. His vision was darkening at an alarming rate. _Guess this is the end of the road._

_Bam._ The loud sound of a sniper sound being fired burst through the air. The hold on his windpipe went limp, and before he knew it, he was falling onto the ground face first. _Fuck it. _Despite the pain, the fresh rush of air through his throat was welcoming, to say the least.

He felt someone roll him onto his back. "Cole! Answer me, damn it!". _Ashley?_ Unable to give a vocal reply, he gave a thumbs up in return. "Are you okay?". _Obviously not. _But he gave her another thumbs up anyway. People tended to ask the most stupid of questions when they're worried.

He turned his head slightly, only managing to see the body of his would-be-killer slumped on the ground, head bloody, a bullet lodged at the back of his head. _He's dead. _He couldn't believe it. _He's dead, _he repeated to himself. "He's gone, for good.", he heard Liara say.

A sudden wave of exhaustion washed over him. Colburn felt his eyelids getting heavier by the second, threatening to cover his eyes. He felt a slight pressure over his torso, which was enough to elicit a shot of immense pain, causing his eyes to shoot right back open. "Don't sleep!", he heard Ashley order.

_No promises._

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_Vega_

"Come on! Show me what you've got!". Vega squeezed the trigger of his shotgun twice, taking out two Cannibals in succession.

Vega, along with his Prothean squadmate, were leading a band of Alliance soldiers, advancing towards the beam. Their progress was fast. _But not fast enough, _to Vega at least. High command had somehow managed to gather information that -contrary to what they all thought- both Shepard and Anderson were _alive,_ _and on the Citadel. _Now, they were making their way to the beam, to provide whatever support they could give.

"We have to push forward! We're too slow!", Javik shouted over the gunfire.

"Gee! Ya think?". Seeing that the coast was clear, Vega started running again. "Move your asses!". They had barely gotten a hundred metres when red beams started to cut through the buildings next to them, like a hot knife slicing through butter. The falling debris showered down dangerously close to them. The beam came again, this time aiming directly for them. "Find cover!"

Vega sought refuge behind a blockade, as it allowed him a full view of the Reaper, as well as any possible hostiles on the ground. Taking cover in a building would be just like digging their own graves. "Come on, Javik! You're the Prothean! Any idea how we're gonna take down that bigass motherfucker?"

"We need heavy artillery! Like missiles!". _No shit, Sherlock._

Before they could do anything, a bright blue wave arrived, passing through everyone and everything on the surface of the Earth. _What the... _Promptly, the Reaper in front of them, which was just firing at them a minute ago, deactivated and simply collapsed.

"Attention all forces, this is Admiral Steven Hackett. The Crucible has fired. I repeat: the Crucible is fired.". That means Loco got the job done...

"This is Major Kaidan Alenko! The Reaper we were fighting just crashed down!"

_We succeeded?_ "Lieutenant Vega, do you read me?"

Vega found himself staring into thin air, but quickly snapped out of it, managing to sound level. "Uh, yeah! Same here!"

There was temporary silence over the comm, but he knew it was only because they were trying to drink in the one fact everyone currently fought hard to believe: _they'd won._

_Oh, little did he know their sweet victory was shortlived._

"This is the Normandy! We're crashing! Mayday! Mayday!". The distress call soon turned into nothing but static.

_Dios mio..._

_Joker!_

**A/N: Told ya people were gonna die.**


	40. Chapter 40

**A/N: Woohoo! We've hit 22 subscribers! Welcome aboard, Dracconnis! Oh, and yes, there will be an epilogue. This story won't end anytime soon. For all we know, it might continue for another ten chapters. No need to be sad. Besides, did I tell you about the prequel I'm doing right after this thing ends?**

**KatieK98: Hey! You're back! Was wondering were you went! Oh, and you totally massacred the review button, but I love it. I went O.O when I saw my email inbox. Lol! Anyway, welcome back! Glad you love it so much. And you actually recommended it to your friends? Awesome!**

**Oh, and, yes, blue is the colour of the 'control ending'. But don't worry. Over here, there's no freaking ghost boy, no colour-coded options. There's only one ending - _my_ ending. The reason it's blue is only because it's prettier than green or red. Lol.**

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-Normandy crash site-

_Garrus_

_Spirits... _Garrus managed to rush himself off the floor of the Main Battery room. He checked his body for injuries. _Nothing hurt, only a sore leg. Lucky me._ Retrieving his Mantis from the workbench, he slowly made his way out.

"_For the love of..._". Garrus was flabbergasted. The Normandy was unrecognisable, with the random flame caused from the crash flickering every so often. The whole place was dark, pitch black even. Cautiously, he turned on the flashlight on his sniper. The whole crew deck was well, a shipwreck. Keeping his footsteps as light as possible, the Turian made his way to Life Support, where there was an emergency duct to provide access to the upper decks.

As he arrived at the door, he found the it locked tight. "Damn it.", he muttered. _Now what?_

"Allow me.". Vakarian jumped straight up at the electronic voice, before realising it was friendly.

"EDI?", he asked uncertainly.

"Correct.", was her reply.

"Did Joker make it?", he queried as he proceeded towards the ladder.

"Affirmative. My physical platform is currently escorting him to safety out of the Normandy, along with engineer Adams, Donnelly, and Daniels.". _Thank the Spirits._ "Most of the other members of the crew have already been evacuated."

_Most? That means not all of them. _"I'll go look for the others. Where are we?"

"Fifteen miles north of the beam.". _That's pretty far. _"I have detected no hostiles in the vicinity.". _At least that's better._

"Alright, got it. Have you sent out the distress beacon?"

"Yes."

"Good. Contact me when there's anything new. Vakarian out.". _Okay, I'm at the conference room... So CIC it is. _Turns out, EDI had already managed to get most of the basic powers back online. _Oh what I would do without her._

Scanning his eyes across the CIC, he saw no one. _Clear._ He had taken four steps towards the bridge, when he heard a soft groan. He abruptly turned around. "Anyone there?", he hollered.

He heard a vague muffled sound in the direction of where the galaxy map used to be. Rifle at the ready, he quietly moved towards the noise. _"Mmnph..."._ The sound was getting louder.

"Hello?". _No answer. _He was about to head back when something grab his leg. _Spirits!_ He was about to randomly spray the ground with sniper rounds when he saw who it was. _Damn it! _He quickly knelt down beside the fallen comm specialist. "Traynor! Traynor! Are you okay?" She let out an almost inaudible sound in response, weakly trying to get a grip on his arm. "Come on, let's get you outta there.". He tried to pull her up. _Once. Twice. No use._

Then he saw the real problem. There was a giant ass piece of metal laying on top of her, effectively pinning her down and trapped. Garrus tried to lift the hunk of metal off Traynor, but it was futile. He could hold it no more than ten seconds. He growled in frustration. _Think. _

_I've got it! _"EDI, I need your help!". In no later than three minutes, his favourite AI had arrived. The chunk of scrap was no big deal to the robot, who simply hurled it away like a datapad. Gently, Garrus lifted the woman up in his arms, and made his way outside of the Normandy, EDI by his side. "How long till reinforcements get here?"

"ETA is fifteen minutes. I have detected no further lifesigns aboard the ship. All twenty four crew members present and accounted for. There is zero casualties. The Normandy's emergency life support system has proven effective."

"Good.". Vakarian delicately set Traynor down on the ground. She was still breathing, _thank the spirits,_ but she was clearly on the verge of unconsciousness.

"Let me.", one of the crew said. _Rogers,_ as Garrus remembered it. The red-haired man was often found chatting at the Mess Hall. Rogers gently applied pressure onto her legs. "Is it painful?", he asked the specialist.

She slowly shook her head. "Here?". _Another no. _He turned his head to Garrus. _Not good, _he mouthed. Rogers moved closer to the Turian, and whispered softly. "I don't think she's going to be alright. Our best bet is to just wait for help to arrive."

_"Well then, pray someone up there is watching over her..."_

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-Base camp, medical centre-

_Tali_

_Keelah..._ That was the only thought that went through the Quarian's mind for the past five hours. Everyone was hurt in one way or the other. Liara and Ashley had come rushing in with an unconscious Colburn in tow, while EDI and Garrus had brought along yet another unconscious Traynor and a broken Joker.

Kaidan and her had been one of the luckier ones. The adept had been shot in the left shoulder, and was currently receiving treatment. On the other hand, her suit had suffered from only a minor rupture, which was quickly mended, resulting just a small fever, which felt kind of silly compared to the injuries of thousands of other soldiers and marines.

Though, Ashley, Liara, Vega and Javik had gotten away unscathed. Speaking of which, the Prothean had went somewhere no one knew, presumably to sulk and scowl and complain about his 'unfortunate predicament' of living with a galaxy full of 'backwards people.'. He hadn't even bothered to help, or even shown concern for any of them. _Just as well. We don't need his wonderful enthusiasm anyway._

"Are you alright? Liara told me your suit got a rupture.". Tali jumped in surprise at the sound of Garrus' voice.

"Oh... Uh, I'm fine. Thanks for asking.". _Why the hell are you blushing, you bosh'tet!_

"That's nice to hear.". There was an uncomfortable silence. Neither of them knew what to say.

"So... How is Samantha?"

"Oh, Chakwas is tending to her now...". _Okay, this is awkward. _To her surprise, Garrus spoke again. "Rough day huh?"

"Talk about it... Everyone's hurt, yet we don't even have enough supplies or beds."

"Damn Reapers. Well, at least we've defeated them for good this time round. Had hell of a fight?"

"You bet, Vakarian. Though I think Shepard and Anderson took the worst of them..."

If Turians could look surprised, Garrus sure did. "You found them?"

"That's the point... It's been so long, and we haven't found them!"

**A/N: Well, that's 40 for ya! And speaking of which, Second In Command turns 2 months old tomorrow! Whee!**

**And, I just created a new twitter account, so follow me, especially for updates with regards to this. Add me at Conviction_SC**


	41. Chapter 41

**A/N: Well, it's official! This thing is two months old now! Yay! And we have 49 reviews now? Wow!**

**1138: Well, I hope you're better now. Take care of yourself. Thanks for the review! And uh, I don't kill off characters just for the sake of it. It really depends on the possible plot twists and ways of developing the story that decides whether they survive or not. If I think it's going to make for a great storyline, I'll be willing to make Cole the antagonist/dead.**

**As for romance, well... I'm at this point where I can't decide whether to have Cole and Ash break up or not. Help me out a little bit? Leave your opinion in the comments!**

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_Colburn_

It was as if God was playing some kind of sick joke on him. Maybe He didn't like him. Or maybe he was thinking too much. _Maybe._ Bottom line: _he didn't know._

He didn't know if everything that happened was due to karma or not. Or if he had sinned too much, like Thane. He'd never went to church. He had never believed in God, or any supernatural, all-knowing being out there. _And he still didn't._

The raindrops hitting his shoulders, the all-too-familiar _pitta patter..._ It was as if whoever-up-there was mocking him with his tears of sadistic laughter. _That's what happens when you don't believe in my existence._

Colburn had no idea how long he had stood in front of the grave. Everyone else had returned a long time ago. Samantha had only stuck around for a few minutes longer. _Sam... Why her? She doesn't deserve anything like that. She just wants a small little house with white picket fences. Why remove her freedom to walk? Why?_

He read the words on the tombstone for the umpteenth time.

_In remembrance of Lea Marie Rodriguez. _

_A valiant soldier, heroine, sister, classmate._

_She will be remembered dearly by family and loved ones._

_"From ashes to ashes, dust to dust."_

The scene of her final moments flashed through his mind.

_Samantha was crying, in her wheelchair. The both of them were on either side of their sister's bed. Lea was clutching both of their hands tightly till her knuckles turned white. He didn't say anything. Just watching, standing as still as a rock. Her hands went limp. Samantha cried louder. He still didn't move. No tears, no shouting for his sister to wake up. Just standing, staring._

In less than three hours, he was already back to work, gunning down remnant Reaper forces on the battlefield. No one talked to him. They knew better than to approach him. Even Hackett left him alone. _Heartless,_ they called him behind his back. _Cold blooded_. _Unfeeling._ He didn't care. He didn't want to care.

There was no time for grief. He understood that. The Reapers were gone, yes, but that was only half the battle won. The rebuilding, recuperation, _both mentally and physically_. That was the hard part. But he would never heal. He never could. The only thing to do was to help others deal with their inner demons, _all the while pretending that his didn't exist._ Maybe that was his only way of escape or redemption.

It was a small, simple, quiet funeral. At the burial, he had not spoken a word. In fact, he hadn't said anything for the past two days. There was too much to say, too many to mention. So he opted the coward's way out: _remaining silent._

The familiar _ping_ of his Omni-tool sounded. _It was from Ashley._

_There's news on Shepard. Emergency meeting. Come back now._

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_Kaidan_

As everyone took their seats around the conference room of the SSV Shanghai, Admiral Hackett begun to speak. "The group of marines in charge of recovering Admiral Anderson as well as Commander Shepard have got some news for us after searching through the wreckage of the Citadel for the past couple of days. The reports are... Unfavourable."

"Before we begin, Admiral, there is an announcement I would like to make.". All eyes turned towards Miranda Lawson. "As per your instructions, all data regarding Commander Shepard has been collected. Lazarus 2.0 is ready to be initiated at any time."

Whispers traveled throughout the room, only to be shushed by Hackett speaking again. "Thank you, Miss Lawson, but I'm afraid that wouldn't be necessary.". A small glimmer of hope surfaced within Kaidan. _Shepard survived? But Hackett should be happy, right? Why didn't he tell us? _Similarly, soft voices resonated throughout the room again. Apparently, they all thought of the same thing. "They...". Hackett seemed to have trouble spitting it out. "Couldn't find his body."

This time, the soft whispers transformed into loud exclamations of disbelief. "What? Are you sure?"

"They've searched every inch of it.". The Admiral tried to placate the large group of agitated squad members. Out of his eye, Kaidan saw Colburn simply remaining in his chair, staring at Miranda Lawson, as if trying to dissect her through sheer gaze alone. "They've found the bodies of The Illusive Man, as well as Admiral Anderson's. But there is no sign of Shepard. They found his blood trails, leading up to the console that activated the Crucible, but the body's nowhere to be seen...". Kaidan hoped Hackett was kidding, but the Admiral's sombre expression told him otherwise.

_You gotta be pulling my leg. Is this some kind of stupid prank?_

**A/N: There you have it. Honestly, I'm more excited about writing the next chapter than you are! But since the next chapter is potentially the make-or-break chapter of Ash and Cole's relationship, it would have to wait. No promises though, because I have come up with at least ten different versions of chapter 42, all vastly different.**

**And yes, I don't mind if you think Colburn's a bloody SOB. He's kinda meant to be one, in a way. **

**For me, there are two rules to make a good OC story. One, readers can hate and love him at the same time. Two, no story is a story without tragedy.**


	42. Chapter 42

**A/N: You guys aren't making this easy you know. I NEED A DEFINITE OPINION! ROAR! LOL.**

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_Colburn_

"That will be all. If we have anymore news, you people will be the first to know. Dismissed."

One by one, everyone exited the conference room, going off to do whatever they were supposed to. _Time to act_. Colburn walked up towards Miranda Lawson. _"You.",_ he declared in a harsh whisper. "We need to talk.". The both of them walked to a quiet corner.

"How may I be of service, Captain?". _No way I'm buying that._

"Spit it."

"I don't understand.". _Don't play coy._

"You know something."

"Know what?"

"You _know_ _what._"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Colburn ran out of patience. He gripped her by the throat and pushed her against the wall in a chokehold with his right hand, biotics glowing in his left fist. "Don't lie to me! Talk!", he hissed.

Two pairs of hands quickly grabbed him from behind, and dragged him off the operative. "Are you crazy? Get your hands off her!". Colburn turned his head to see Kaidan and Ashley restraining him, while Lawson tried to regain her calm composure. He tried to struggle against them, but Ashley tackled him to the floor. "Get her outta here, Alenko."

_Damn it! _Colburn watched the adept escort Lawson away, while Ashley continued to pin him to the ground. She only let him go after seeing that the both of them were out of sight. "What the _fuck_ was that for?", he growled.

"What the hell were you thinking? Were you just going to kill her?", she snapped back.

Colburn merely stormed off. He couldn't be bothered.

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_Ashley_

Ashley wasn't one to be brushed off that easily, and so followed Colburn she did. All the way to his quarters. The Normandy had been repaired as quickly as possible, so as to allow the crew to move back in, in return providing more space for refugees.

Colburn had continued to ignore her, but she didn't relent. Only did he respond to her out of frustration when they reached the door to his room. "What can I do for you?", he asked with mock and sarcastic politeness. The urge to bite the bait was tempting, _but not tempting enough._

"Talk to me. What's going on?"

"There's nothing to say.". _Oh no you don't._

"Oh really? The Colburn I knew uses words, not his fist. What's wrong?"

"Are trying to ask who's the guy standing in front of you? Fine! The person standing right here is a cold blooded jackass who doesn't give a fuck about everyone else and beats the crap out of everyone just because he likes it.". He lowered his volume. "Happy?"

"I know you've been through a lot lately. Samantha's handicap... Lea... But that's not an excuse to self-loath like how Shepard did."

He scoffed. "_Self-loath?_ I'm trying to make things right! I messed up twice, Ash! _Twice!_ I told myself it wouldn't happen again. _And it did! _I failed four _fucking_ four times! Right now, I'm trying to make things right again!"

"Then let me help!"

"_Help?_ _She_ tried to help! And it got her killed!". _She?_ Ashley had a hunch that it wasn't Lea he was referring to. "Just... Leave me alone, Ash. I can't afford to screw things up anymore. I need to do this myself. For Shepard."

"What has this got to do with Shepard?". He didn't reply. "I'm not going anywhere until I get some answers."

"I don't know for sure myself. Maybe this is another mistake, or maybe... I don't know.". Ashley could see the genuine doubts and uncertainty in his eyes, but she also spotted that tiny glimpse of belief, _a conviction_ that whatever he was hoping for would be true.

"Let me know when you've got it sorted out, okay?"

He merely gave a nod of his head.

_It would have to do._

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_Colburn_

He waited until the footsteps behind the door were gone before literally destroying everything on his work desk. "God fucking damn it, Miles Colburn! What the fuck were you thinking?", he shouted out loud to himself. "You've almost lost the only lead you had!"

He covered his face with his hands. _You failed Lea... Shepard... And __her.__ This is your only chance, Colburn. Don't muck this up. _He knew what he had to do. He walked over to his private terminal and punched in a few keys.

He only had to wait for a moment before the other party picked up the call. "Hello?"

"Kasumi, this is Colburn. I need your help."

"How bad?"

"_Very._"

**A/N: There ya go. The question of breaking Cole and Ash still stands. Come on, there's 22 of you guys. A little help please? You can get a virtual cookie! :D**

**What exactly is our vanguard looking for? Take a guess!**

**Ps: I wonder how many of you actually read the A/N.**


	43. Chapter 43

**A/N: Alright guys, I've got good news. This story has 8,634 hits! Yay! Damn that made my day. Next, we've got member 23! Welcome, Sarge234! Woohoo!**

**Since three of you voted to have Ash and Colburn stick together, well...**

**Let's not touch on that in the meantime.**

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-XO's quarters-

_Colburn_

_"Yes, affirmative. The body has been recovered safely and quietly. No one knows about this. However, his sidekick apparently caught onto something. He's getting suspicious. We have to lay low for awhile... Understood. It'll be _done asap."

A soft beep marked the end of the recording. "Sorry, Colburn. That was everything I could get before getting noticed by Lawson. But I'm pretty sure no one could've known I was there..."

"Don't worry about it. What matters most is you escaped safely anyway. Besides, this little piece of intel's more than enough. Thanks again, Kasumi."

"You're welcome. But... Whatever you've got up your sleeves...". The master thief was interrupted by a series of footsteps behind the vanguard. "Looks like you've got yourself a visitor. Gotta go.". The terminal's screen promptly turned to black as Colburn spun round in his chair to find Ashley leaning against the wall.

"Hey.". He tried to sound as humorous as possible. "What are you doing here?"

"I should be asking you that question."

"What are you talking about? This is my room."

"Yeah, sure. I didn't know you live in a demolished room. EDI told me what happened after I left. Damn it, Cole. What aren't you telling me?"

"I've told you everything I know."

"You're lying."

"Look, can we not talk about this? I don't see why we should start screaming at each other every time we meet."

He watched her take a deep breath. "Okay...". She walked closer to him, opting to sit on his now barren desk. "How are you doing?"

"Surviving."

"Cole..."

"_Fine._ How about 'on the verge of insanity'?". She didn't say anything. "It's just... It's been rough."

"I know, but maybe you should try to look on the bright side. Samantha's receptive to the physiotherapy the docs are giving her. Maybe she'll be standing in no time."

"Six percent isn't very high, Ash. You don't have to act all cheery for me to see."

"I'm not acting, Cole. I really think that way. She's a nice person, God won't let anything bad happen to her."

_Fucking hell God will. Look at Shepard, Lea, your dad and grandfather. They're all dead and dishonoured for doing the right things. _But he bit his tongue before he could say it out loud. Colburn managed to let out a rather doubtful _"Maybe."._

"I figured you would be a little more optimistic."

"Why?"

"You've clearly forgotten about your job as Mr Counsellor."

_She's right. _Colburn found himself slightly perturbed. He realised he hadn't bothered to put on his 'think on the bright side' mask ever since he returned from his short absence due to the indoctrination treatment.

Ashley seemed to be able to read his mind. "I know, Cole. _I know_."

_She does?_ He felt a sudden, illogical pang of vulnerability, as well as a need to cover it up. "Well, now that you know, the show's over, huh?". He tried to be as casual as possible.

"You're a hypocrite, you know that?"

"Why?"

"You just told me to stop acting, and now you're doing just that.". _Maybe she does know me._ "We can't have secrets, Cole. Or else this thing won't work."

"It's going to be hard."

"If we could defeat the Reapers, I don't see any reason why we can't get past it."

"It's going to take time."

"We have plenty."

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-Next day, hangar deck-

_Kaidan_

"I still find it a little unbelievable that Javik actually saved millions of lives."

"Tell me about it. I bet that jackass couldn't speak a sentence without bitching and moaning."

Kaidan mused at Colburn. "You seem to hate him a lot."

"I'm going to be nice and polite and just say that he's the kinda guy only a mother could love."

"That's actually pretty mean."

"I could've said worse."

"Granted.". Kaidan let out a soft chuckle. "But, you have to admit, he's a hero. If he hadn't warned the Citadel Council about the Citadel being the Catalyst in the nick of time, they wouldn't have launched emergency evacuation plans. And millions would've died on the station, including-"

"_Ashley's family_. Yeah yeah, I got the message. Though I still can't believe the whole place is like, a bunch of debris floating over Earth now. Do you really have to rub it in?"

"Only because it's you."

"Wow. I feel so cherished, thanks.". Colburn's words were dripping with sarcasm.

"Really, treasure her, Cole. She's changed a lot ever since you two-"

"I know."

"She really wants this thing to work out. Any other fella, she would've thrown him out of the airlock."

The both of them laughed out loud, but stopped short when they heard the elevator door open. "Gentlemen.". _Uh oh._ Kaidan eyed his friend warily, just in case he tried to attack their visitor again.

Instead, Colburn merely smiled. "How may I be of service?". His words were viciously pleasant. Kaidan figured three biotics in a hangar full of weapons and vehicles and crates would most probably be a recipe for disaster.

"Can we talk?"

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_Colburn_

"Why, Miss Lawson, would you want to talk to me in private? You even had my friend leave the hangar."

"You know why."

"Oh my. I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. Besides, aren't you afraid I'd try to kill you?"

"You're not making this easy."

"Wasn't planning on it.". Colburn figured turn-about was fair play. He was better composed now. He could play all day.

"Well then, I see no reason in beating about the bush. I'm only going to say this once: stay out of anything that doesn't concern you."

_Just what I've been waiting for._ "Why? You're afraid that I'd tell the whole damn galaxy that you're hiding Shepard's body?". To make his intentions known, Colburn deliberately spoke loudly, resulting in an echo from across the big, empty hangar.

"Don't make me.". Biotics glowed in the operative's hands.

Before Colburn could do anything, a female voice he had never heard before came from the elevator. "Stop!"

The both of them turned towards the source. It was a relatively tall blonde lady, in her late fifties, wearing the immediately-recognisable Officer's uniform of the Systems Alliance. _She looks just like..._

"General Shepard!". Miranda Lawson seemed to falter in front of the lady. _Of course! Hannah Shepard!_

_Little did Colburn knew shit just hit the fan._

**A/N: Figured I'd be nice to Colburn for once. I mean, he has survived quite a bit under my writing. Then again, I'm an evil mastermind. We've gotta strike a balance, right? And I'm actually surprised (and kinda bummed) that you guys want Cole and Ash to stick together.**


	44. Chapter 44

**A/N: Colburn is dead. I'm not kidding. iBayne killed him in N7: Galaxy at war. Again, I say: Damn you, iBayne. Damn you.**

**Oh, and in case you guys didn't notice, most of the chapters ever since the end of the war has been in Colburn's POV. I'd wish there were some other way to give focus to the other characters, but I can't think of one so far.**

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_Colburn_

Colburn couldn't believe what he was hearing. "We had hoped that we would manage to get his body out of Earth, but alas..."

_This can't be. _"So, what you're saying is... _Shepard asked to not be revived? _"

"Yes, Captain, _yes_.". Hannah Shepard sighed. "It was my son's request. It was during our vidcall while he was on the way to London... However, such a thing could not be known..."

"_Now,_ do you know why?". _Great._ He felt like an idiot, especially with the oh-so-snarky attitude that was Miranda Lawson.

"But...". Maybe it was the fact that Shepard's mother was standing right in front of him, or maybe it was the notion that it was what his CO had wished for. Colburn found himself unable to rebut the words of both women.

"I understand your concerns, Captain.". The General tapped something on her Omni-tool. "These are the coordinates of where my son's body is held at. He will be shipped out on the day of his official funeral held by the Alliance two days later-"

"General-". Miranda Lawson tried to stop the older lady, but General Shepard paid no attention to her. Instead, she raised a hand to silence the operative.

"As I was saying, we will transport his body elsewhere during the day of the ceremony. Discuss this with your team. They'll get to say their final goodbyes to him. You might think of going there guns ablazing to retrieve my son. But I know you won't betray me, Captain. I place my trust in you as much as my son did."

_Great. Something else to make matters even more complicated. Now I'm a backstabber either way._

"Farewell, Captain.". And with that, the older Shepard left, operative alongside.

_Great, just great. Now what do I do?_ But he knew the answer.

"EDI, get every single one of Shepard's squad, both Alliance and ex-Ceberus. Tell them to meet me at the conference room in twenty."

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-Normandy, conference room-

_Colburn_

Things went crazier than the vanguard had anticipated.

"This is ridiculous!"

Colburn stopped a sigh from escaping his lips. "I know, Garrus. I know..."

"Well, since we know where Shepard's at, I'd say we just tear the place down and get him. You said there weren't much security, right?"

Colburn shook his head in exasperation. "Zaeed... She trusted me not to betray her trust... She didn't need to tell us where Shepard is. I think she deserves a bit of respect."

"But this is our only chance to get him back... We can resurrect him and... And it'll be just like old times, right?"

"Yes, I agree with Tali. All we have to do is get him back, then we'll wait for another two years, and Shepard's going to be as good as new again... It's gonna be like the old days."

_Christ, Kaidan. Not you too._

"Maybe not...", Jacob mumbled. "He was literally meat and tubes when Ceberus found him on Alchera. But now, we've probably got the whole body intact... We don't need two years. Six months, tops. Then he'll be up and running as always."

Colburn briefly looked towards Liara, the usual 'cool headed and logical' one for support, but immediately he could see the doubt in her eyes.

"Hey, why the hell not? Things are gonna be a whole lot fucking boring without the King Of The Boy Scouts."

"I support the human female. Shepard saved the Krogan from the Genophage. We will do anything to revive him.". Grunt might have been tank-bred, but he definitely thought like any other Krogan.

Soon, the whole room was in chaos as more and more people joined in the conversation, discussing plans and tactics on storming the area Shepard's body was held at, strategies, going 'dynamic' or utilising stealth... Colburn felt himself sway towards their stand. _It'd be so easy to just go with the flow. They would get Shepard back... Everything would be back to normal... Just a short six months..._

_But no. It would've been wrong as well. _So he did what he had to. He owed that much to Shepard. Everyone present owed that much to Shepard. _The galaxy owed that much to Shepard._

"SHUT UP!"

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_Ashley_

_Well, that got their attention. _The room turned silent instantly. Ashley stole a glance at Samara. The Asari Justicar was silent, so was Kasumi, the master thief. Miranda Lawson wasn't around, which was unsurprising, as Kaidan had told her about the operative's visit.

Ashley hadn't spoken either. She didn't know what to make of the sudden overload of information. Things would've been simpler if Shepard hadn't made that request, or if he really went missing. Then again, nothing was simple for them. Eden Prime, the 212... Snap out of it, Williams! This isn't about you.

"Listen.". Colburn's voice was pleading. She had never heard him speak like that. "I know you guys want Shepard back. So do I, more than anyone else. I know, out of everyone here, I've spent the least time with him. I didn't defeat Saren with him aboard the SR1. I didn't go with him through the Omega-4 relay..."

"What are you trying to say, punk?"

Colburn glared at Jack. "_All I'm saying, is that we try to stand in Shepard's shoes, _go with what he wanted."

"_Or maybe,_ you're just some indoctrinated asswipe who doesn't want Shepard-". Subject Zero had yet to finish her sentence before she went crashing straight into the far wall, an angry Colburn grabbing her by the collar of her jacket.

"_Don't you __dare__ question my loyalty._", he hissed menacingly. Ashley hurriedly moved forward and dragged him off the other biotic. Apparently, everyone else, including Jack, were still trying to recover from the sudden outburst. Ashley couldn't blame the vanguard though. After the issues with his father, it was no wonder that he was especially sensitive when it came to questions on loyalty.

"Look, I don't care how you look at me anymore. You either just visit Shepard peacefully for the last time, or you don't go at all. And don't even bother to try anything funny, because I'll be watching.". He stormed towards the entrance, but stopped short after a few steps. Without looking back, he spoke again, this time tone tinted with a mixture of disappointment, disgust, and exhaustion. "This isn't about you, me or anyone in the galaxy. This, is about Shepard. He's done more for this galaxy than everyone put together. It has always been others first, and himself last. He died _twice_ to save us. Maybe it's time we thought for him. Tomorrow, we come back to this room to do a vote.". He paused for a bit. "Think about it."

Colburn had already left for five minutes, but everyone still stood still, as if their feet were rooted to the metal floor.

Ashley was sure about one thing: _Nobody is going to sleep tonight._

**A/N: Well, there you go. Leave a comment on what you guys think of the ending so far. I've been trying to develop one that no one has ever thought of before.**


	45. Chapter 45

**A/N: Hey guys. Sorry for the slower updates. I've gotten a really really bad cold. The meds didn't help me stay awake. I'm like trying to type this out with a clear head, so bear with me for this chapter.**

**And I just read "Ashley bashing in Mass Effect 1" by morgan taylor. All I can say is that the author is a biased, immature bastard who clearly has an IQ level of a five year old. It took me all of my effort to NOT write a hate review. He's clearly like one of the guys from my class, who are as childish as wanking toddlers and don't deserve a girlfriend and should die alone in solitude, where no one knows he died until the body starts to rot and the neighbours discover a decomposing body lying on the floor seven days later.**

**Okay, that's enough of hating. If you guys wanna read, go search for stories including Ashley rated as M. (morgan taylor: if you're reading this, go fuck yourself you douchebag. That's what happens if you so blatantly post an Ashley bashing fic for invalid reasons.)**

**And no, I'm not bashing him because he bashed Ashley. It's because the reasons why he hated her aren't reasons _at all._ I'd bet that no self-respecting girl will even attempt to date him. In the unfortunate event that they do, they'll break up with him the next day. If they stick with him, they're probably just trying to rip him of his money.**

**And I'm not a blind Ashley supporter. There were times when I went "No Ash, what the fuck are you doing? You're so racist!" during the first game, but I thought she really matured in the third.**

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_Traynor_

"Yes, that's the way... You're doing well, Samantha. That will be enough for today. I'll see you tomorrow?"

Traynor flashed a smile at her physiotherapist. "Definitely. Have a good night, Dr Spencer."

Just then, the door to Traynor's ward swished open, revealing a friendly figure standing with what suspiciously looked like two cups. "Ah.", Spencer noted. "I see you have a visitor. Goodbye, Samantha.". The doctor acknowledged the other man with a smile as he exited the room.

"Hey there."

Traynor's smile grew. "Hey yourself, big guy. What are you doing here?"

Colburn walked towards the table and placed to coffee cups on the table. "What, I can't even visit my sister? Or did that cute doctor make you forget about everyone else?"

She playfully punched him in the shoulder as he sat down on the bed beside her wheelchair. "Figured you should've known my... _preferences..._ after so long."

"Hey, Citadel law didn't state that you can't swing both ways."

"If I did, I would've picked you.". She pinched his cheeks for further emphasis. "You're kinda cute, you know that?"

"What, you're a paedophile now?". He recoiled away from her in mock shock.

"So you finally admit that you're a babyface?"

They both laughed at the reference to a certain past event. "Wise ass."

"Aww. Don't worry. I don't need a very angry kickass military woman knocking on my door, or burning down my white picket fences.", Traynor teased. She bent slightly forward to reach for a cup, when Colburn slapped her hand away. "Oww! What was that for?"

"That's not yours, you glutton. _This,_ is yours.", he chided as he handed her the other cup.

"Something special about that cup?". She gasped in faux surprise. "You've got a treasure in there!"

The vanguard rolled his eyes. "Mine's tea, you dumbo. Yours is coffee."

"Since when did you switch to tea?". She leaned in towards his face. "Look at you. Those dark eye circles! Didn't know Humanity's next stage of evolution was transforming into pandas. Or did you try using eyeliner?"

He glared at her. "Just haven't slept well. Guess I got caffeine overload during the war."

Samantha knew the man long enough to know that whatever that caused him insomnia must've been really serious. She placed her hand on top of his. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

She took a glance at the clock, and it struck her. "It's Shepard, isn't it?"

"Sam..."

"Why aren't you visiting him?"

"I..."

"You won't get any chances after tonight. He's gone tomorrow."

"I know."

"Everyone's going to talk to him for the last time... Why aren't you with them?"

"I just... I just can't face him, okay?"

"Why?"

"Yesterday...", he recounted. "They were still planning to just grab him. I talked them down. Today, they all agreed and promised not to tell everyone else about it."

"So?"

"What if _I'm wrong,_ Sam? What if this isn't the best for Shepard? What if I thought wrongly? I just denied him of his chance at life. _I killed him._"

"That's not true."

"But we'll never know. He's not going to jump out and say _I don't want that,_ Sam. He's never coming back again, and I helped make it happen. _I_ persuaded everyone to not bring him back."

"You've never doubted yourself. Why now?"

"_This is Shepard. _No one knows what he really wants. It's always been what _we_ wanted. I've only been with him for _what?_ _Ten weeks?_ Others spent three years with him. Who am I to make that judgement call? How do I even deserve to make that decision?"

"And why did they listen to you in the first place? Because they know you know him best, Cole.". She lifted his chin up to face her. "I can't say for sure if it's the right call, but if General Shepard trusts you, I damn sure do.". She locked him in a tight embrace and whispered into his ear. "You did the best you could. Shepard won't blame you."

They remained motionless for ten minutes before he spoke again. "Thanks, Sam. I don't know what to do without you."

"I love you too."

**A/N: Here's some Cole/Sam fluff for you guys. Figured I should have a bit of her in it, since she's suffered the most out of everyone else. And yes, I do enjoy writing Cole/Sam more than Ash/Cole. Mainly because it's absolutely possible to throw in "I love you"s without the cheesy dialogue that come with couple conversations. We all know for a fact that Traynor swings for women anyway, thus it's completely impossible to have that degree of affection between the both of them. In my mind, she's like the ultimate shebro for guys. :p**


	46. The Epilogue

**A/N: Hello guys. Welcome to the last chapter of Second In Command. It's been a great journey, and I really hope you guys enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. This thing lasted longer than I thought. Two months? Wow. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that Colburn's story doesn't just end here. I've actually created a new story detailing Colburn's life story from 2174 to 2186. I hope you guys subscribe to it as well.**

**Web: s/8213007/1/**

**Mobile site: s/8213007/1/**

**All in all, thank you for the support, especially those that have been with me from the start. I love all 23 of you, and I hope to see each and every one of you guys at the new story, Metamorphosis.**

**Ps: Since you guys have been asking for Ash/Cole fluff, I'll give a you guys a large dose of it, considering this is the last chapter. You guys so owe me big time for this.**

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_Ashley_

The affair was anything but low key. Hundreds of senior officers, both Alliance and aliens alike, had attended the funeral. Despite the crowd, the whole thing was quiet, save for the chaplain's prayers. Ashley had given a speech, just like everyone else that had served under the Commander.

But despite the flowery words, praises, compliments, thanks and recognitions, the whole thing felt empty, hollow, meaningless. That was because they were indeed insincere. Everything they had said, were merely for show. Whatever they really wanted to tell Shepard, they'd already done it the night before.

During the ceremony, she had stolen a glance at Colburn, who was standing a few rows away, every so often. He had declined to say a few words about their commanding officer. Hell, the Captain hadn't even went to visit Shepard the previous night. Ashley noticed that Colburn had never once made eye contact with anyone, particularly General Shepard, or the empty casket that was in full view. His eyes were practically glued to his shoes.

They were currently at the Gallant Garden, an area which had officially been marked as the resting place of heroes who sacrificed themselves in the Reaper War. The small, light raindrops falling from the grey, overcast sky made Ashley wonder if God was actually mourning for Humanity's first Spectre.

"Hey.". A tall figure stepped up beside her, speaking in a soft whisper.

"Hey Vakarian."

"I still can't believe he's gone like that...". She didn't reply. "Before the final push, I was still talking to him about what happens if we died. He said that, if he was in heaven and I wasn't, he'd be looking down on us, watching our backs. You think he's doing that right now, Williams?"

She let out a small, harsh breath. "I just hope he's found peace with God. He's earned the rest."

"Yeah...". Neither said anything for awhile. "Hey, you see Colburn?"

"I just...". She turned her head around, searching for the XO, but he was nowhere XO be seen. "You're right. He's not here."

"Should we check on him?"

"After this thing ends. We can't just walk away."

"Good point."

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_Ashley_

Ashley had managed to sneak out during the luncheon reception, and had went to look for the missing officer at the only place possible: _the SR2._

What she _didn't_ expect, was running into a stumbling Colburn when the elevator's doors opened on deck three. "Woah there. You okay?", she asked as she caught him before he fell face first onto to hard metal floor.

"Thanks. I uh, yeah. Thanks.", he mumbled rather incoherently.

She noticed his hand clutching a small bottle rather tightly. "What's that?"

"Sleeping pills."

"You not sleeping well lately?". Ashley honestly had no clue. The both of them had never really spoken much to each other for the past couple of days.

"Caffeine overload during the war, I think. Switched to tea, but apparently it didn't work, so yeah..."

"Come on, I'll get you to deck one."

"It's okay. I can handle myself."

"No argument this time, tough guy.". He silently complied, allowing her to shove the both of them into the lift. "I didn't see you at the burial.". It was a statement, not a question.

"Didn't feel too good, decided to come back. Besides, we all know he's somewhere else right now anyway...". The doors opened to reveal the first deck, with Colburn not even looking at what used to be Shepard's quarters. "I can take it from here. You should get back. Didn't they say about a candlelight vigil or something?"

"It's okay. The thing's taking place a couple of hours later anyway.". She had reached for the console before Colburn could stop her, and the view made her stop dead in her tracks. The whole place was like a shipwreck. Datapads were strewn all about the place. Forty bottles of wine stood on the table in front of the couch. Angrily, she spun around to meet Colburn. "What the hell are you doing? Pills? Alcohol? What are you, a junkie now?"

"Just leave me alone.". He brushed past her.

"Not unless you tell me what's going on.". She placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"Why does _everyone_ want to know? Just pretend you didn't see anything!"

"You know we can't do that. We care about you."

"Then don't!". He threw himself down on the couch, running a hand through his hair. "This is just like Illium...", she heard him mutter to himself.

She sat down beside him. _Is this about her? _Ashley's eyes widened when she realised she had vocalised her thought out loud. All of a sudden, Colburn _broke down, right in front of her._ It was as if someone had opened the floodgates. The sight was pathetic, to be honest. The cold, objective driven Captain, reduced to mere tears. Immediately, she leaned forward, locking him in a tight embrace. She gently stroked the back of his head. "It's okay...", she soothed.

_"I killed him, just like I killed her..."_

"Let it out...". Colburn had finally run out of space in the backyard. She didn't blame him. She was sure what ever caused this temporary, instantaneous burst of emotions was something much, much more than Lea, Samantha, and even Shepard. Ashley made a mental note to ask Tantus about everything, but until then, the broken man crying out loud in her arms was of utmost importance. She planted a light kiss on his forehead. "It's okay..."

He cried louder than ever, shaking his head as he did so. He sank into her arms, wailing even more painfully as he did so. His whole body was shivering badly.

_"I'm here for you."_

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

_Colburn_

Colburn woke with a start. A warm, blue glow filled his vision. His eyes felt as dry as sandpaper. His first instinct was to stand up from the couch, until he realised the sea of black in front of him, and a weight on his torso. _What...?_ Then he realised the _black_ was actually _hair,_ and the _weight_ was actually _an arm_ draped across his stomach.

Somewhere through the night, the both of them had fallen asleep in each other's arms, right on the couch. He felt his cheeks blush slightly at what happened the previous night. He had _never_ cried, not for the past six years, at least. The only other time when he had ever broken down was with Catherine by his side, in front of _her_ grave. But another part of him was happy for the sudden, abet involuntary indulgence.

As gently as possible, he removed Ashley's hand, and sat straight up, trying to get a clear look at the woman beside him. She was still soundly asleep. _It must've been tough on her last night. _Carefully, he scooped her up in his arms and walked over to the bed. Slowly, he tucked her under the covers, making sure to take off her boots as well. Threading lightly, Colburn made his way to the bathroom to take a shower and freshen up. Ten minutes later, he exited to find Ashley awake, propped against her elbows.

"Hey there.". Her voice was still evident of sleep.

He walked towards her, smiling. "Good morning to you too.". He sat down on the bed beside her.

She took his hand. "You okay?"

"Much better. Truth be told, that was the best sleep I've had since... well, ages I guess.". She stifled a yawn. "You've gotta be tired after everything. Go get some more sleep."

She ignored the last statement. "Cole... Who is _her?_ You mentioned about Illium and..."

The temptation to shrug the question off was strong, but she deserved the truth more than anyone else. "She was... my partner for an op during N7. Things went bad, she got killed halfway through. She was a great woman... I promised her husband that we'd both be fine, but _I failed._"

"I'm sure you did the best you could."

_But it wasn't good enough. _"Hey, you're burned out after yesterday. Why don't you go get some sleep, for like, a few hours or so. Then, we can go get brunch together."

"Sounds great.". She slid back under the covers again. "Where are you going?"

"Somewhere I need to."

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

_Colburn_

The Gallant Garden wasn't hard to find all. Throngs of people in small groups carrying flowers were all headed to the same destination. _Another sign of the Reapers' damage._ Shepard's grave was easily spotted. It was grand, prominent, distinctly so from the rest. Colburn scoffed a little. It was exactly what Shepard wouldn't have wanted. He was a low-key person. If he wanted such a grand funeral, the Commander wouldn't have had his mother go to such troubles to hide everything. He could've just had a will sent to Hackett, saying that he would like to stay dead. But of course, they would've gone ahead with Lazarus 2.0 anyway. As much as Commander Shepard was a respected name, the man's wishes had no place against the 'I do what I want for my own interests' ways of the Alliance officials.

In less than three minutes, Colburn found himself staring at the dreaded tombstone. The image of an empty basket being laid into a earth flashed through his mind. _No, this isn't about her. Stop it. _He was there to make peace with his inner demons, and he was planning to do just that.

"Hey Shep.", he started. He didn't quite know what to say, but he wasn't going to just leave. "I hope you're wherever you want to be right now.". Go on. This is your only chance. "I hope I made the right choice. God know I tried to. We all wanted you back. It would've been just like old times. But we know it wasn't right. You deserved a rest. You've done a lot for us, Shep. I think it's time we returned the favour."

Oddly, the words tumbled out as he continued to speak. Gradually, Colburn felt as if an invisible weight was slowly sliding itself off his shoulders. There was none of the anguish. In its place, was the recounting of the old times, both good and bad. _The drinks, laughter, fun. The arguments._

"I'll miss you, Shepard. We all will.". _We already have. _This would be the final goodbye. He would never be coming back in front of this grave. He would move on, and never look back. Colburn had dwelled too long in the past. It was time to snap back to reality. "Goodbye."

He turned around to leave, when he found an unexpected figure looking at him. "General Shepard?"

"Good morning, Captain. Would you care to take a walk with me?". She gestured towards a skycar parked not too far away. "I'd like to thank you, Captain. I've heard that the squad had planned to retrieve my son's body, but you talked them down."

"He deserved it, ma'am. He's given his life to the galaxy twice. It's time we did something for him."

"Regardless, I thank you, on behalf of both him, and myself."

"Where is he now?"

"His ashes are currently on the way to Alchera, where they'll be scattered in the winds."

"Alchera huh?". Funny how things come full circle.

"Yes. He died when the SR1 got destroyed. I think it is only appropriate that he be laid to rest with his beloved ship.". The General took something out of her pocket. "_This,_ is his gift to you."

Colburn took one look and immediately declined. "I don't think..."

"Accept it. It's his last blessing for you."

"I...". He faltered. "Thank you."

"Keep it safe."

"I will."

"Good.". She nodded in approval. "Now let's move on to bigger issues. My son had mentioned about a certain transfer problem about you?"

He wasn't sure where the woman was steering the conversation to. "Yes ma'am. Why are you asking about this, if I may?"

"Well, now that your father's gone for good, what are you planning to do? If you'd like, I can have you transferred to the Normandy permanently."

"Thank you for the offer, ma'am, but I don't think that's necessary."

"Why?", Hannah Shepard asked, a puzzled look on her face. "I thought you'd always tried to get a transfer."

"I did, ma'am. But now that this thing's over, I don't really think I should remain on the Normandy, or rather, the Systems Alliance, at all. I'm thinking of going back to the old days, being a freelance merc and all that."

"A mercenary?"

"Yeah. My mentor's a bounty hunter, actually. I grew up gunning down criminals. Maybe I'll even strike it rich.", he joked.

"I was planning to maybe have you recommended for a promotion to be the ship's CO."

"No, really. Thanks, but I think I'd be better elsewhere."

"You're a fine soldier, Captain. It'll be a waste.", she said wistfully. "But I can see you've made up your mind.". She stretched her hand out.

"Good luck, Captain. I wish you all the best."

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

Epilogue

MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD

-One year later, the Shadow Broker Ship-

_Colburn_

"Well, I still think it's bullshit that you rejected her offer."

"Come on, Ash. I know what's best for me. Look at the past one year. I've done a lot more than I ever could in the Alliance. Besides, being a merc for Liara is probably the best job I can get. The Shadow Broker pays well."

"Guess you're right. I still can't believe you managed to buy a house in Vancouver in just two months for Samantha."

"Why, you jealous? You know, I don't mind if you joined Javik on Kahje. Maybe be their Hanar goddess or something."

"Jerk.". They laughed. "Anyway, we're like, a couple of hours away from Earth. CO says we've got like, a week of shoreleave. Planning to visit my mom and the girls."

"CO huh? Is that what you call Kaidan nowadays? Does he call you XO?"

"Shut up."

"Fine.". He raised his hands up in surrender. He was about to speak again when a green light blinked on his other terminal. He turned the screen on to find a message from Liara.

_We're landing in ten minutes. Get prepared. The Batarian pirates have heavy artillery._

"Well, guess I gotta go. We're raiding a Batarian pirate hideout. Landing in ten."

"That's the seventh time this month!"

"Hey, like they said: _no rest for the wicked._"

**A/N: Well, there you go. Again, it's been a really great two months writing this fic. I like to think I've improved in my writing, but it remains to be seen I guess. Do remember to join Colburn and I again on Metamorphosis, which already has its first chapter published yesterday.**

**Before you leave, I have a favour to ask of you. Considering this is the last entry for Second In Command, I'd like to ask each and every one of you to leave a review, stating which part of the plot/character of this series you liked the most, as well as hated. Please,please,please do leave a review. It's the last chapter. .**

**Also, here's a few things you probably didn't know about SIC and me:**

**1) Colburn wasn't meant to have a love interest. He was supposed to be single, with a sister-brother relationship with Ashley instead of Traynor.**

**2) The reason why he had one, was because of a very particular friend. She told me: "I know you're not a romance person, much less a romance writer, but just because you don't like it doesn't mean your characters should be emotionally (and possibly sexually) deprived as well.". So Cole/Ash supporters, you should thank her.**

**3) Every time I wrote a romance scene regardless if it was Cole/Ash or Kaidan/Liara, I wouldn't be able to sleep well for _a week. _Somehow, I would just keep waking up at least thrice a night. But since you guys like it, I plan to deliver.**

**4) I listen to sad, emo songs for fun scenes, and happy songs for sad, dramatic, emotional scenes. Wierd, I know...**

**5) Most of the time, I already have a plot planned in my head. I even have the specific dialogue ready. But when I actually sit down and type on my phone, everything goes out the window and I end up improvising along the way instead.**

**6) The epilogue was vastly different than I had planned... Really, really, different.**

**7) I've actually had some Prototype 2 references in one the dialogues. Wonder if any of you noticed it.**

**Well, that's really the end here. Honestly, I'm reluctant to end it. But at the same time, I'm curious to see what my brain can come up with for a totally, original plot for Metamorphosis. Again, I had a great time, and I hope you did too. See you at the other story!**

**- ConvictionSC**


	47. PLEASE READ VERY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

**A/N: Hey guys, what's up? Now you guys might be wondering what's a chapter 47 doing over here. Well, I have an announcement to make.**

**I'm starting another series. It's called Off The Record. No, it's not about Cole. Okay... Maybe it is... Gah, I'll just tell it to you straight. IT'S A ROMANCE SERIES.**

**YES, THAT'S RIGHT. YOU DIDN'T READ IT WRONGLY.**

**Well, you see, I still feel terribly guilty (and kinda empty) now that SIC's over, and that I've come to know that some of you -or rather 99.9 percent of you- were disappointed in the severe lack of romance content as well as humour/witty dialogue. Thus, I have created OTR as an outlet to group all of these one-shots of fluff, romance, and Garrus-teasing fun. And when I say romance, I MEAN IT. _Really._**

**Which to say, the entries don't have any over-arching plotlines. Just a bunch of unrelated, heartwrenching, tummy-aching stuff. Also, I will be posting prototype versions of content that I previously meant to include in any of the 46 chapters, but I scrapped them at the last minute. Think of it as a kind of 'behind-the-scenes' or a sort of 'deleted-scenes' kinda thing.**

**Now, some of you might think, "Hey, I thought you totally hate romance?"**

**Well, I still do. It's just that a good old friend of mind (aka the same bloody person that had me pair up Ashley and Cole) had managed to persuade me that I owed you guys the romance content, and that I should make it up to you guys. Well, I said yes, naturally. I really, really feel bad that you guys were disappointed.**

**At the same time, I've come to understand that authors, like actors, have to portray characters that are totally unlike them. It's just part and parcel of the whole deal. So, after realising what an awful writer I am, I decided to officially start this whole romance project.**

**So, good for you guys! (and for me as well, I hope). Maybe it'll make me get over the whole romance phobia thing. Or at least I wouldn't feel like vomiting every time I write those kinda stuff.**

**And, yes. You guys get to request for plots for the one-shots. In fact, I already have a request from that particular friend, to write a Garrus one. It goes like this:**

**I want you to write a short ficlet about Garrus dealing with a certain doctor by the name of Chloe Michelle, who has a BIG crush on him.**

**Well, guess what? I'm working on it right now.**

**So, I hope to see all of you (or at least some of you, since no one except for iBayne and Soviet Defector subscribed to Metamorphosis) at this whole romance nonsense of mine. Chapter 1 has been published already.**

**Once again, so long, my dear readers. Hope to see you guys at OTR at least...**

**- ConvictionSC**


End file.
